Start Over
by Tainted Grace
Summary: After a bad break up with her boyfriend of almost 2 years Bella decides to start over, the thing is he wont let her. AU fic. ALL HUMAN. Edward&Bella. If dominating Edward isn't your thing i suggest not to read.
1. Prologue: Im done

**Summary**: After a bad break up with her boyfriend of almost 2 years Bella decides to start over, the thing is he wont let her. AU fic. ALL HUMAN. Edward&Bella. If dominating Edward isn't your thing, i suggest not to read. xD

**Authors Note**: I dont really know why i came up with this idea, its my first Bella&Edward fic, i really dreamt once about another fic of them that Edward changed when he finally found a family or somewhere to be in this world and then suddenly he comes dissapointed with something or someone, he loses control of everything he worked and becomes raw and fury, he even burns up the city, it was a really good dream, that i'll try and give it a try, i had this dream before i even heard of Twilight. (in that dream there wasnt bella and edward but there was this guy that played Peter Pan and the girl)- okay why im rambling this? Dont mind me. Ok thiiis fic, its a totally new idea, where edward is rude, can she make of him a better person? If you guys like this prologue and idea ill promise ill write more, even if you dont, cause i got really good ideas for this one :D But just let me know your thoughts :)

**Prologue**:

I was done. I made sure he heard me when i spoke my words.

_Im done. Im done with you_.

The thing is; he didn't like to hear what she had to say, he didn't take anything seriously, he didn't take** her** seriously. That was her first mistake; how could she expect to take 'whatever they had' seriously, if he couldn't take himself seriously? It was a joke, all of this it was a joke to him. He didn't see past friday night. And she needed a serious commitment, she needed someone who could see past through high school.

For once she was done with this lifestyle he implanted on her, well...a lifestyle she implanted on herself by dating him, it was not the way she acted, it was not who she was, she was suddenly the typical stereotype of the girl who dated a jock, she started trading jeans for skirts, school for Seattle and books for sex, until there was nothing less but a restless never ending story that started over and over again.

She missed the boring life of simple Bella Swan, she missed the stay at home watching a movie on friday, she missed the time she had to herself and her dad, she missed to study, she was tired of being passed as a numbless dumb girl who failed math, when she perfectly was good at math but just didn't have the time to study because her jerk of a boyfriend wanted to 'fool around' 24/7, she missed her best friend, Jacob! A real best friend who wouldn't report back to Edward what she was doing or where she was or with whom when he wasn't sticking his tongue on her mouth...or dick...anyways!- she had been nothing but horrible to poor Jake, for Edward's request, she wasn't allowed to speak to him, see him was out of the question.

Well she was done with it, she was done with him.

She was just glad she could get out of it in one piece. Little did she know she will be having trouble getting out of it at all.


	2. Surprise, surprise

**Authors Note**: :O wooow i loooove the reviews you guys send me :O im still shocked, seriously like i read them over and over again. I feel so loved :) I dont think i deserve them. Hehe Thank you! 3 Im planning on making it worth your time. Hopefully (yn) :) You just say so when it starts to suck! :P

I always try to update as soon as i can :) Sadly by the mornings i work, so there isn't much time for me to do so, but in the afternoons i always keep writing, so please keep reviewing :)

**BEEP BEEP BEEP**

It was hard to get back on your feet after a nasty break-up, but what was even more harder was having to face the whole world on school the next day, waiting for yet another show in our parts, which they got a lot because Edward liked to be loud, and humiliate people.

Thank God i was done with that.

Sighing i set the alarm off before my headache grew.

I was not prepared for what was about to come, i had no intention what so ever to try and talk to those people, i didn't want to go back in there and put a hypocrite smile on my face and wave them off, that was not my thing. Things ended really bad with Edward, and i was **NOT** having any of their BS, i had to deal with my own problems, that thank God since this fine day did not include _him_.

I took my bag and ran down the stairs as soon as i turn to the kitchen i saw Charlie, zipping his coffee and reading the news paper, i smiled to myself, i barely had time to see him since he worked like 24/7, that and the fact that even if he was at home i wasn't.

He widened his eyes when he catch me starring, i sent him a sweet smile and sat beside him.

-Wow! Isn't it like too early for you to be up?- he sarcastically said to me, i rolled my eyes at him but couldn't stop the smile forming in my lips.

It wasn't really that early, i barely had like 10 minutes to make it at school in time, you see, Charlie used to be gone before i went to school, i used to tell him i'll be out 5 minutes after him, but he was clueless that i was late for school every single day, of every single week. That was because my ass of a boyfriend-wait...ex boyfriend used to ride me to school, only on his command, cause apparentely i couldn't ride myself to school, he wouldn't allow it, so i had to wait til' his ass was up so we could go, i could have complained, but i knew better.

-Did you had a fight with the toasts again?- i asked taking one of the almost black toast in my hand. He gave me a glare, holding his laugh.

-Hey! Watch it! - he pointed at me with his finger, i laughed.

-Now, what did that toast ever do to you?- i asked as if i was grieving for the piece of bread, that didn't appeal to me in the least.

-It was glaring at me- i heard him say while i got up retrieving my back from the chair, i laughed once again as i headed for the door.

-Leaving so early?- I nodded- What about Edward?

It was obvious my dad wasn't aware of my love life, and even if he tried to look interested i usually didn't let him, it was for the best, not giving explanations and avoiding him to know the awful relationship i was in. I wonder if he even knew i was not a virgin?

Of course i wasn't, i dated Edward Cullen for almost 2 years, i couldn't be. Its not like i planned it, he pressured me on it for along time, and finally it happen, it was for the best, i could avoid any more arguments.

I shrugged my shoulders at Charlie, and that's all it took for him to finish the interrogation, he knew i didn't wanted to talk about it, and that would be enough for him, at least till a couple of hours.

Before i could manage to get out of the hourse properly i heard Charlie's voice call out to me once again.

-I went to see Billy last night- i looked at him weird, he continued- Jacob really misses you- i sighed and moved my head to the side so he wouldn't see the pain in my eyes- You guys used to be really good friends- i cut him off before he had any chance to say more.

-I'll see you later dad!

_Jacob_.

I was pretty horrible to him, and it still surprised me he would even go back and try to talk to me, he always did, not once giving up, giving Edward more reason to punch him to the beat, images of Jacob's face will always be printed in my mind the day i ran to him after i had a fight with Edward, the first and last time i did that.

It was bad.

I could barely distinguish his eyes from his eyebrows, so after that i made it easy for the both of us, if i just stayed away, it was for the better. If i didn't went to him and stay put, Edward wouldn't have a reason to touch him.

And he would be safe.

I ran my hands though my hair as i parked on the lot of the high school, and the crowd was already there, and they we're waiting for someone, i sighed one more time watching them through my review mirror, there they are, each one of them attaching to their partner, i notice Edward wasn't there, figures!

After all we we're always the ones to come in last. Edward was grumpy in the mornings.

I walked through the lot, my hands firmly on my jacket pockets, decided to step in, i just had to walk pass through them and it will be over.

It was easy, i didn't had to be mean, i just had to wave them off. Maybe say a little 'hi' after all, they we're my friends too, we had fun together excluding the fact they didn't make my life easier with Edward but aside from that, they we're nice.

I politely smiled at them when i was close enough, they looked around me for some reason, looking...searching. I shrugged it off and put my hand out, waving them with a quick smile i kept my walk steady and firm for the entrance. I was glad my feet we're doing the job today.

-Bella?

-What's with the wave?

_Laugher _

-What is she doing?

I shrugged it off one more time and was glad i was finally inside the building, somewhere safe. Sitting in my class my mind wonder, what was that all about? Did they think i will feel comfortable being around them after Edward and i broke up? Of course not! I felt out of place.

They needed to understand that! Its not that i was trying to be mean or anything, its just... it was weird!

-Miss Swan! So glad you made it!- Mr. Clark notice.

I smirked at him, it was obviously odd to see me in first period, or second. I had to say, i still didn't like him, so i played it cool. I gained over the years one or two tips from Edward.

-Missed me?

-Yes, actually i haven't seen you since..- he pretended to be thinking- what was it?...freshman? - i smiled cooly at him.

-Brilliant, you can do math!- i fake amusement. He kept smiling at me.

-If you stay long enough i might give you a lesson or two! - he smirked, i send back a smile, but it finally dropped once he turned around- Allright class today...

I felt a nudge on the ribs once i picked up my math book, i turned around to see Alice giving me a look, that i should have known better. When did she get here anyway?

-What? - i hissed rudely, that's when i realized what i was doing, shock was now on her face but was soon recovered once she decided to speak.

-What was that all about?- my eyes furrow together, why was she that surprised?

-He's a smartass- i said pointing to the teacher - what was i- but she cutt me off mid sentence.

-This morning!- she snapped, her eyes we're furious, i was still confused- In the lot!- she snapped a little harsh.

Immediately i avoided her eyes that were piercing through mine, at any minute now she would killed me with those, she was tiny but she knew how to stand her ground.

-I just thought it would be easier, after Edward and i broke up- she widened her eyes in surprise?

Surprise? What the-?

-When did you broke up?- her voice was not surprised though, it was more like defiant. For a moment i thought Alice Cullen was transformed into Edward.

-What do you mean when!!? - by now my fists we're clenched, wasn't it obvious? After i stormed out of the house yelling: IM DONE WITH YOU!? After we spend hours and hours yelling each other in his room.

-You were there! We broke up!- my voice firm.

She let out a scoff, i watched as she sat on her sit comfortable that cocky grin all the Cullen's seemed to possess on her face. And i couldn't do anything just sit back down and stare after her, that's when i heard her whisper to me something that made my anger boil deep inside of me.

-_Does he know that_?


	3. Sanctuary my ass!

**Authors Note**: Thanks for the awesome reviews, i have received so many story alerts but no replies :) oh please do replie i want to hear your thoughts. Im really sorry for my raw writing you see english isnt my first language. :(

**Important Note**: flashbacks are in italics, if you please

Alice's words we're soon forgotten once i tried to pay attention to math, which i found it even more harder then i remembered, it was like i was living in the twilight zone, everything was a blurr.

Limits. Limits. Why couldn't i remember anything about limits? Where was i at that lesson?

Limits.

Oh right, i remember! No, i dont remember about limits. I remember where i was.

_It was Tuesday and the guys we're already fed up with school for the rest of the week. Or month, who knows? They have enough money to pay their way to collage. So we skipped and decided instead to go to our "sanctuary", it was this beautiful hidden please down the forests, trees were tall enough and everything was green, it was beautiful, there was even a little pound practically down our feet which we opted not to go in for a swim cause case number 1-it was dead freezing, and number 2: it was black, who knows what you'll find there. It still gave the place a strange feeling of danger and peace, that was partly why we crashed there the whole time, that and the fact that it was totally unsupervised. _

_Edward and I had lots of fun in this place, believe me when i say; lots. But once we we're all gather together we just passed the time laying back in the soft grass chilling and smocking, well...they did, i was not a fan. _

_"Why do you have to be such a bitch!?" Jasper yelled back to Alice trying to shut her up with a kiss, but she kept pushing him away with her tiny hands on his chest, apparentely Jasper was having the hots for Lauren Malory at school, or so she heard. Emmet and Rosalie we're having fun watching them argue and I was for once glad we weren't the ones putting out a show, i looked down on my lap watching his body fit mine between my legs perfectly, how the back of his head was pressed down on my chest and his back on my belly, his arms resting above my legs squeezing them a little every time his fingers traced up and down them. _

_He was not paying attention to the show he was busy taking a drag of the almost worn out cigarette, his expression was hard to read so i tried to lay a soft kiss on his neck to catch his attention, he simply moved his head to the side obviously giving me permission to continue, and as much as i didn't felt comfortable doing this around the guys i was kind of getting used to it. _

_Who am i kidding? I would never get used to it. _

_I continued laying hot kisses up and down his throat, nibbling lightly his neck, putting some kind of pressure on my lips the way he enjoyed it, the way he liked to do himself. Aside from that my attention on him was numb, he wouldn't once look up or tell me what was on his mind, so if this was all i could get then sure as hell i was gonna take it. _

_That's when i heard a slap, i turned my face around to see how Alice had that shock look on her face and Jasper's head was turned around lightly, all of the sudden it was soon recovered with Alice crashing in top of him and kissing him passionately, Emmet whistled as Rosalie laughed, my reaction was a soft chuckle. I grew jealous instantly, i wished i could do that. But hell no, that was totally out of the question for me, i couldn't possibly hit him/kiss him and get away with it so easily, i cant even remember the last time i tried to hit Edward, or the time i did for that matter. It was like my mind was blocking those memories for my own good._

_I felt a nudge on my leg bringing my eyes down on his, they we're dark, filled with lust. I know perfectly in what mood he was in. I brought my lips down to his and meet him half way for a deep filled with lust kiss, as per usual it was filled with that intense passion he put in all of our kisses, kissing him up side down was not a challenge anymore, i knew by far anything you need to know when it comes to private moments with your boyfriend by the age of 16, we had done more then 7 positions in bed by the time i lost my virginity, Edward was experienced, he had been with old ladies before, they took him for a grown up cause he could well enough pass up for one, sometimes i worried i might not be enough to full fill his needs but he teached me and so i learned. _

_His warm tongue parted my lips apart and made its way in, when i heard the whistles and cheers i pulled apart, they we're so childish. I blushed a little and my head tilted down afraid to meet their smirks, Edward wasn't completely happy about my move either, he growled under his breath and harshly hissed to me: _

_"Prude" i ignored him, not all the time i manage to get away with it, he was stronger than me he could have easily tackle me down to the floor and ravish my mouth, but today he's mood was at ease. I pressed my lips together and stared right ahead of me not once looking back at him or the group, eventually they'll get bored and take their attention to something else then my embarrassment. _

_"How do you even have sex!?" Emmet pushed. _

_"Like do you put a bag on your face or something?" Alice said teasingly. _

_"Let me guess you turn off the lights" Jasper was the next to speak up. _

_"How original" Rosalie smirked. _

_I stood there uncomfortable as hell, looking everywhere but at them. _

_"No, actually during sex she goes on top" i shot my eyes in pain, that was not something they needed to hear. How dare he?_

_"Edward, please" i hissed utterly disgusted by the conversation they we're having like if i wasn't in the room. _

_"Or she's down on her knees" he smirked at all of them. They laughed, i could hear Rosalie and Alice giving disgusted grunts, what a bitches! Like if i hadnt caught them giving heads to the boys! Hell or the time i found them having a threesome. Not one that Jasper was aware of course. _

_Or Rosalie. _

_"Stop that!" _

_"She even lets me finish in her mouth, take that!" I suddenly felt the need to get up and get the hell away from them as fast as i could, but as soon as i made the move i was back down on my ass, his hands gripping tightly my tights this time, keeping his hard weight on my body._

_"Stay put Bella" came his warning. _

_"Well are you done talking like if i wasnt in the god damn place!? Its not like im painted!" i spat harshly. I could sence a fight coming, he stayed put where he was though not bothering to look up at me or fight back for that matter. _

_"And you're not talking either!" he simply said. Everything felt quiet then, i could sence everybody stopped even breathing. _

_"Hey guys!" and that was what broke the silence, or the tension, whatever floats your boat. _

_I looked up to see none other then Jacob Black standing like a fish out of the sea, i shut my eyes in pain at what was to come, to his view i was probably growing annoyed by him, but in reality i was just fearing for him. _

_I heard Edward's demented laugh then. _

_"This can't get any better" he mumbles to the guys, i tilted my head down embarrassed to look at his eyes, if i did i would have probable notice the love glance he threw my way hoping i'd catch it. _

_"What are you doing here Jake?" i let out a frustrated sigh, but it was not about his presence or the fact that i was annoyed by him, it was for his own good, so he would understand there was nothing good about him coming out on us like this, it only made it all worse, for him and her. _

_"I did not have class, so i decided to join you" he smiled politely at everybody, probably trying to get in friendly. _

_I sighed one more time rolling my eyes, hopefully he will catch it as a sign to : GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE! _

_"Jesus Bella is that any way to greet our guests now?" Edward said rather enthusiastic. Jake had even a 'hopeful' look in his eyes, damn this kid needed to grow some balls. _

_"Come in now Jake, sit! We we're just talking about how good Bella is in bed" his words we're measured, making sure each one of them held the same hot whisper, as he said this he rub down his head against my breasts over and over again with a smirk on his face almost like he was getting in ecstasy, i blushed madly, but it couldn't be compared to the red that crept over Jacob's cheeks._

_I tried to move my hand so i could put an end to this but Edward took it in his, almost like if he was reading my mind. So i sat there unable to do anything. _

I wish to have studied limits instead of going to that stupid "sanctuary"!


	4. Game over

**Author's Note**: I can never be enough thanful for the amaziing replies you guys sent me, i really appreciate your time and your comments :D

Im terribly sorry for the short chapter im trying to study french for my exam tomorrow xD

OH a **thanful note** to **chelseapeeler** for editing this chapter! :D i cant thank you enough for the effort and the time :D

Now I don't like to brag, but I definitely deserved some credit for getting out of the Cullen's sight after first and second period; it was not every day I got lucky like this, even though I knew the worst was to come.

But why?

Why did I fear facing him? Alice's words echoed in the back of my mind; Does he know that?

I made it pretty clear if you ask me! Unless he was mentally challenged, I didn't see why he wouldn't get it. We were over! Done! Finito. The eeendoo.

What if he didn't want to grasp the concept of breaking-up? Why should I care? It was my damn right to end a relationship that I was just involved in it as he was, if not more; though he didn't seem to notice that. I didn't need his approval or consent to end things if I felt like they didn't go anywhere and I was getting fed up with this storm of a relationship, but try telling Edward that.

I knew one of the many things that had me so shaken up and anxious was the fact that Edward Cullen liked to be loud. I hated the fact that the entire population of Forks was involved in my love life because of the fact that he couldn't hold his tongue properly. He not only liked attention, but he demanded attention.

_I was adjusting my books inside of my locker reaching around for my red notebook when I felt rough hands grip me from behind. I flinched immediately and turned around. I was surprised at my actions because come on who else in the world would touch me like that? Who else would dare to touch me and pass through his command? Of course it was him. Who else? _

_But when my eyes searched for his I couldn't find them, instead I was glaring at Mike Newton whose speed increased once Edward moved to tower me. _

_"See you later Newton," he made sure he snapped the words harshly; yeah it was not over for poor, old Mike. _

_"What are you doing?" I hissed more harshly then intended. I made quick work in removing his hands from me as I tried to compose myself hoping they hadn't notice his hands on me. Edward's eyes fell down upon me now sending shivers down my spine. Confusion, surprise and anger were running through me and he obviously noted my sudden discomfort of his hands on my body, but didn't seem to really care. Hell, he knew I didn't like to be affectionate around people, let alone in school, but that didn't stop him from making sure that how profiles were kept low. I didn't like attention, but since he did that was all that mattered apparently. _

_His eyes fixed mine intently and I kept the hold of his gaze. _

_"You're my girlfriend! Why shouldn't I touch you?"_

_That being said, his hands didn't bother to stay in the pockets of my skirt where they previously rested, but instead hid themselves under my skirt gripping my left cheek firmly as he pulled my body forward to his with a sudden strong jerk. _

_Of course his words were spat harshly and they were loud enough to catch everyone's attention. Once again I failed in keeping people's attention away from me and once again he succeeded. _

_"Mr. Cullen, I'll save you a seat in detention today."_

_Mr. Lynus' voice broke the tension between our two bodies as I pulled safely backwards to the locker. In any other situation he would have resisted and stopped me from_

_doing so, but he didn't have a choice. He had definitely heard the voice from behind him, but I could feel his eyes buried deep inside my head as I kept my gaze steady to the floor. _

_"I'll be glad to join you," Edward's velvet voice spoke. _

I was shaken out of my thoughts when I felt my phone vibrate from my pocket. I saw the caller ID name and froze. Edward. Well I guess if I had to deal with him, the phone would be the safest and quietest way to do so.

"Hello?"

"Where are you?" he was frustrated.

"What do you mean? I'm at school!" I was confused.

"What do you MEAN you're at school? I stopped by your house and there was no one there! WHY are you at school?"

Now, this is just great! What the hell? I was kind of expecting he would forget about our break-up, but not that he would actually have the guts to do it.

"Edward, I broke up with you!" My words we're cut off just as quickly as they started.

"You did not!"

"I did! What are you like 5?" I snapped harshly like he was dumb.

"Do I seriously have to damage the piece of crap you drive again Bella?"

I ignored his comment like he ignored mine.

"Stop doing this Edward! Its over!"

My words were low, but firm and they had a menacing tone that I learned to possess in my after years of being stuck with a particular Cullen.

"Like hell it is. This isn't over 'til I say it's over!" I hung up, afraid that my words weren't strong enough and that they would tremble which would so easily give me away. I knew if I opened my mouth it was done, he would have the advantage and then

it was done, game over for me.


	5. Decisions

**Author's Note**: oh my god im sorry for leaving you hanging that long, I'll try not to do that anymore, I promise. Life is hectic right now :( Thank you so much for all of those amazing replies, they always bring a smile to my face. Thank you!

_I was struggling to organize my books in my hands while walking back to the parking lot under Edward's huge arm on my shoulder, I had so many stuff to do, Science's project with Angela, History essay, and Math homework, and on top of that I still got to head home to meet with Angela cause she was nice enough to tutor me for English! I needed the grades up, and I needed to focus on school at least for one weekend. _

"_What's all this you have going on in here?" Edward asked me taking my books from me clearly helping me before they would fall off while I still struggled to get some papers out of my bag. _

"_Homework" I whined annoyed. _

_Once in the car I started whining on how much stuff I had to do before tomorrow. _

"_Edward I seriously need to get back home, Angela has even offer herself to tutor me and help me get my grades up, she's so nice but I hate Jessica she's been bitching about everything lately, and oh my God I swear to god hates my guts, he's gonna fail me I can tell, I need to get back to Charlie, Edward! I have to find the rest of my books and take my project with me-" I found myself rambling a lot through all this, surprisingly Edward nodded at me, in understanding. I might have gotten to him perfectly. _

_Maybe today I could back to my place and start doing homework on my own, that was unlikely to happen. My hopes flew out the window when he turned around to the big old Cullen Mansion, I sighed loudly and turn towards him. _

"_I told you I have things to do" I spoke softly trying to get to him the nicest way possible. _

_The engine went dead. _

"_Stop complaining Bella" he said while getting out of the car. _

"_Edward-" I tried to fight but once again my words fell on the air. _

"_Get out of the car" his velvet voice spoke softly. _

"_NO!"_

"_Fine" _

_And with that he marched towards the door, I contemplated my options and walking towards my home would take me some time let alone walking in the middle of the forest with no guardian, and besides it would only take Edward a few minutes before he'd toss me around his shoulder and carry me back to his room. _

_Ugghh damn hi m! _

_Slowly I made my way in, catching a glance to Esme who was cooking dinner, I smiled at her and waved. _

"_Hi Bella!" _

"_Hey! You seem busy" _

"_Well it's a bit crowded in here" she laughed. _

_HA! Really? _

"_Tell me about it" I felt bad, this people had no consideration what so ever with her mother, she seemed a slave, half the time I bump to her she was fetching dinner, and the other half she was doing laundry, I frowned, that wont be my life at all. _

"_You lost Edward?" she half grinned, she knew what was on my mind of course. _

"_Hardly" I groaned loudly. She laughed. _

"_It'll get better, when he begins to grow up" she winked at me, and if I waited for him to grow up I'll be here for awhile. _

"_Need some help?" I offered kindly. _

"_Oh im about done in here" I nodded turning around when her voice stopped me "Do you want your salad with tomatoes Bella?" _

_I frowned and turn to her. _

"_Actually im not staying for dinner, sorry" I smiled apologetic. "I have to get back to my place-" I stopped when I saw her stare, it was somehow worried. _

_But I was indeed standing my ground, I had to go home, I needed to talk to Charlie and I needed my homework done and ready for tomorrow. _

_I jumped the stairs two at a time going straight for Alice's room, when I found her doing her nails I sighed in relief that was a first! _

"_Hey you" she smiled widely at me, I closed the door behind me and lay down beside her taking her magazine away from her, before she had the time to question me I spoke up. _

"_Jasper's not here?" _

"_Nope. He's late again, we we're supposed to go down to Port Angeles and watch a movie" she gave me a frown whining. _

_I smiled at her. _

"_He shouldn't be long" I comforted her. _

"_I tried calling him but he's not picking up" she seemed kind of worried and it didn't seem a right time to ask her for a ride. There goes my chance. There was no way I could ask Emmet, he would himself stripe me to Edward's bed and make sure I didn't leave the house. He said I entertain him. _

_Asshole. _

"_Why are you here?" she asked all of the sudden, I shrugged my shoulders but her intense stare knew better. _

"_I kinda needed a ride?" I asked with too much hope. I heard her laugh and frowned again, I was getting pissed by the minute. _

"_There's no way im giving you a ride and go against dearest brother!" she laughed. _

"_Alice!" I whined. _

"_Im sorry" our rant was stopped when the door swing open and Edward's face stuck out of it. _

"_Jasper's downstairs" he said simply, I heard Alice shriek beside me, im pretty sure the message was pretty clear I frowned one more time my way out of here was long time gone. _

"_You coming?" was the next thing I heard from him, starring blankly at me and then shot the door close, I knew perfectly fine what he meant and that was no question that was my cue to follow him. I glared at Alice one last time before I slammed the door closed behind me. _

_Making my way to Edward's bedroom was hard when I had to pass through the longest hallway ever which lead close to Emmet's bedroom, every time I passed there a new prank was waiting for me, once I did pass through he came out of his room I tried to run but he was already halting me with his big bear arms and spinning me around wildly through the air, how much force did this kid possessed on him? Seriously! _

_He put me down when I was dizzy enough, he gave me a kiss on the cheek and left in a hurry down the stairs not before yelling at me: _

"_I would of take my time but im in a hurry Bells, see ya'" and he was gone, I stood close to the wall for support I needed it after all. _

_The wooden door closed behind me after I walked in with Alice's magazine still on my hand I plopped down to the bed and started scanning through it . _

_Edward had just gotten out of a shower and stood there looking unbelievingly sexy with his hair wet and messed up, shirtless and with only a pair of jeans on, I could feel myself drooling, but I snapped out of it, I was mad at him! _

-Talked to Edward yet?- a cheerful voice from beside me shook me out of my thoughts. Alice.

I sighed.

-Yes, I did- simply I admitted, putting my bag in my locker.

-And?- I heard her breath steady, she was persistent, and I knew she was getting fed up with my lack of information, but I could still see her eyes were perky and cheerful…that was just annoying to me, like she knew something I didn't.

-AND HE KNOWS!- I snapped at her pissed, slamming my locker closed, her face jumped in surprise at my sudden out burst.

I was trying to tell that to myself, cause her words earlier still stung in the back of my mind and they we're annoying the hell out of me.

I turned around harshly just to be met with Edward Cullen's hard face, jaw clenched. My stare moved to Alice, who was smirking.

"I told you she was serious" she told her brother crossing her arms against her chest, she was just waiting a fight, she was waiting the moment he would snap at me, I hissed at her "Bitch!"

_While he worked with his stereo I did a good job at ignoring him and just kept my eyes steady on my magazine which was interesting enough to keep my attention from Edward's tanned hard and beautiful chest and abs and biceps and- damn! My control was slipping. _

"_I would have invited you for a shower but you we're busy bitching around Alice" so he heard. _

_I scoffed at him, what made him believe I would get in that easily with him? _

"_Yeah right! Alice stopped you from doing so" I let him know better, he should have known better god-damnit! I was no kid and I was definitely not going to let him in that easily. _

"_Im sorry you see it that way Bella" _

"_Im sorry I bruised your ego" I snapped._

_He seemed to have finally set for a song cause next thing I knew he was making his way to me, hovering on top of me in the king size bed, I sighed and put the magazine down, waiting carefully for his body to lift up towards me, his mouth covering every inch of my body tracing down to my leg and up to my stomach where he lift the shirt up, brushing his soft lips on my hip bone all the way up to my ribs and finally getting in my face, when he wasn't happy at my reaction of my cold eyes towards him he settle his lips down my neck. _

_Strongly and at the same time softly my arms brushed up and down his trying to gain attention. _

_But he didn't saw it like that, and that was only a motivation for his hormones to go forward, his knee parted my legs apart but I did a good job keeping them tightly closed enough, which went to hell when his hands roughly parted them wide open. _

"_Don't keep me away from you Bella!" he hissed. _

_I groaned at his 'excitement' when I felt it being pressed up against my center, really pressed up, making my back arch forward to the head board, the last thing I needed was my control slipping away._

_I was aware of his big hands working on the buttons of my shirt, but I knew he would be unable to stop without a fight. _

_Slowly I took his face with my hands lifting his gaze towards mine, his eyes were full dark almost black as night. _

"_I really need to go home" the words were out of my mouth slowly and delicately, with so much love, trying to get to him the nicest way possible to get me home and if not at least so he would stop. _

_He shrugged my hands off of him and pinned them above my head, dismissing my words the minute they came out, wasn't enough to be with him all the time? But when I needed something he couldn't be nice enough to grant me one wish. _

_I was not having it. _

"_Ok, STOP!" I pushed his hands away, he gave me a look, but I was more then decided and strong in my decision. _

_His hands took my shirt off my shoulders but before it could go down I held it firm to my body and did my buttons. He stared at me carefully measuring in which mood I was in. _

"_God-damnit Bella stop!" he halted my actions gripping my hands in one of his, moving forward to my body, while his other hand had the courage to undo my jeans button._

"_You're not a kid anymore god-damnit!" he pushed, the nerve of this guy! _

My eyes went back to Edward's , and to my surprise I could hold his dark hard stare just fine, I guess with the years I got better at fighting him off.

I crossed my arms against my chest standing my ground.

"Get out of here" I knew perfectly fine that was not directed to me, but I moved anyways if he shot the words and gave me free will to get out safely sure as hell I was going to take the best of it, Alice moved the same time I did, difference was she wasn't stopped dead in her tracks when she did so.

He was leaning down against the locker with his whole weight in his hand, blocking me. Being this close to him send shivers down my spine I could perfectly fine smelled his after shave and cologne, it was all a fest of smells that send my mind in overdrive thinking of the whole nights filled with lust and passion we shared on his bed, or mine, or the kitchen, the floor, whatever.

He noticed my sudden discomfort or was it pleasure? And I remembered then if I wanted to win this fight over then I'd have to be aggressive like he was, I had to demand things not ask them, I had to scream if it was needed, I have to keep myself steady and not flinch when his words would come out.

"What do you want?"

"Right now? You in the back seat of my car" he whispered hotly, I surprised him when I didn't flinch or shuddered at his words, hell I even surprised myself, that didn't happen every day.

"That's likely to happen after hell freezes over so-"

"In 5 minutes it will" he rudely cut me off, his lips didn't held a smile or grin, hell even a smirk, no they were shot in a tight line, matching the perfect serious tone his voice held.

Instantly I felt my body being pressed to the lockers, and I let him do so but my eyes were firm in his eyes, his body sent shocks of electricity through my skin when he touched me, and after years of being his girlfriend I had manage to get used to it, and love every minute of it.

"I seriously meant every word I said" I whispered, his eyes were no longer on my own, they were on my lips, filling with darkness.

"I have a hard time believing you when you're smelling like sex" immediately I turned around at the harshness of his words, he always had to be very bold.

"Have fun Edward" I heard him sigh when I began to walk away but his hand grabbed my arm halting my actions.

"I just want to talk" his voice was soft and didn't held the same aggressive tone they did seconds ago.

When I searched his eyes, I could tell they were in pain and suddenly afraid, it wasn't the first time somebody left Edward Cullen, he knew what was like the pain of being left alone in the world, and suddenly I was bringing back that same pain.

But I couldn't be left alone with him, cause then I might be afraid of what he'll do he'll trick me into staying with him, and I needed time for my own, I needed space, and for once I was standing my ground, and starting over for good.

"I don't think that's a good idea" I sincerely noted, giving him an apologetic smile, his eyes grew even more in pain, almost felling down to the floor in my obvious rejection, but then, soon recovered with anger, and a cocky grin in his features.

"What? You don't trust yourself with me?" he snapped with a smirk.

I knew what he was doing though, he was disguising his emotions, he was putting them away, the real emotions he felt right now at my rejection, he was blocking them away, like he did all the time when he was with me, he was not letting me in.

"Don't worry Bella, I'll make sure your libido doesn't bruise" I shook my head, with pity in my eyes, and I knew I was making him angrier by the minute, I was pushing it far this time, but I didn't care.

"I've made it clear it was over Edward- he tried to stop me- please please for me! Lets move on" I pleaded with him, my eyes breaking. He shook his head at me.

" I wont" I shook my head at him.

"Its not your decision to make, its over!"

_I pushed him off hard, I heard his grunts of complain but my anger was taking the best of me, I stood up and gather myself together taking all of my things, his hand stopped mine. _

"_What are you doing?" _

"_Im leaving!" _

"_Like hell you are" _

_I shrugged his hands off slapping his hand away when he tried to take my bag from me. _

"_You wouldn't make it to the corner" he laughed crossing his arms against his chest. _

"_Im leaving __**YOU**__" apparently I was being really amusing to him tonight, cause he kept laughing at me. _

_I ignored him. _

"_Why is it that you always have to get away with everything?" _

"_You can do your homework here Bella" he sing song, daring me to say otherwise. _

"_Well I don't want to!- my arms crossed against my chest-I wont!" I throw a fit. It was time to stand my ground this was not about where I fucking did my homework this was about decisions, and I was a big girl to make my __**own**__ decisions._

_He turned around to glare at me. _

"_Im done with this Edward! Clearly we cant be together anymore if this keeps up! In fact im calling it at end, im done with this Edward, I cant do this anymore- the words broke in my mouth and I was almost surprised, my eyes water, I guess i couldn't take the words back now even if I wanted to- im done Edward" my last words we're soft trying not to hurt him so much, he looked down at the floor and I almost cried and broke down right there, I almost launch myself into his arms and kiss him till tomorrow, when he looked up at me with a quizzically look. _

"_You' done?" _

_I snapped._

_Took my things and ran away from there screaming to the whole mansion I was done, and through with their crap. __**His**__ crap. _

I could see I got to him when he stopped me abruptly with confusion on his face, there was no anger or annoyance, there were just so many questions.

"Bella stop!" he pleaded. I took a deep breath, I needed to make this decision. For myself.

"Im done Edward" I gave him a tired look, and he knew he was not getting through me, right now everything he said will just hand lose in the air, there was no game to play anymore.

It was game over for him.

And for me.


	6. Aint Missing

**Author's Note**: Thank you guys! Please keep those replies going. Here we see yet another one of bella's memories.

"Charlie im home!" I called but there was no answer.

Figures!

When I made my way to the kitchen I saw a note on the fridge.

_**Bella,**_

_**Ill be at home by 5 **_

_**Love, dad**_.

When I took the note from the fridge I could see a small picture Edward and I took when had been dating for 7 months, we we're both happy and it was still fresh, I sighed, I missed those days.

It was so easy. And we we're careless. Why had I taken his crap for so long?

Looking back on today I knew for sure things wouldn't be the same, hopefully they will be better, it was not a lesson I was trying to teach him so he could make it up for me, but maybe a reminder for his next serious relationship.

I found myself shivering, why the thought of Edward and another girl had this affect on me? It was like a dagger piercing through me, but then again I don't think he ever felt comfortable dealing with me and other guys either, not even a guy friend, that was out of the question.

He used to tell me "once you earn my trust back, we'll talk about it".

_Once again I had been dragged to another party, I fought way out of random people trying to find Edward he had been playing poker earlier and by the third round I left his side to start to wonder, which was a bad idea cause I was a little bit dizzy I stumbled around and before I could hit the ground Tyler Crowley lift me up. _

"_Wow, careful there Bella" he laughed, I was way to drunk to notice if he was tipsy but it seemed to be, at least he was happy, like cheerful, it made me join him in his laugh while I kept walking but his hand stopped me one more time. _

"_Hey Bella? Are you okay?" he asked me, his voice echoed in my ears way too loud. Everything was a blur after that. _

_Next thing I knew two strong hands were roughly pulling me up and I heard yells everywhere the room. Wait! Room? How the hell did I end up in a room? _

_Edward's face was fixing me, wait-scratch that out, Edward's __**disgusted**__ face was glaring me. My body shake roughly in the weight of his hands. _

"_Edward stop!" _

"_Jazz stop him! He's going to kill her!" _

"_What the HELL DID YOU DO!?" he screamed at me, every syllable made my body shake in fear, my eyes drifted from Edward's hard expression to Alice's worried looks. And all I could think was that my head was killing me. _

"_Ed-ward what-"_

"_ANSWER ME!" he yelled fiercely at me, I tried to shift from his grasp but he gripped me hard if not harder now that I was trying to get away, trying to understand._

_Looking around the room I saw Tyler Crowley in the floor, blood spilling from his nose and a broken lip, and I could see a possible black eye, Jasper was standing close to him. _

"_Tell him Bella! We didn't-" I didn't let him finish. _

"_OF COURSE we didn't!" I snapped harshly shaking Edward's hands from me, but his jaw clenched, his fists tightened on me, and his lips trembled and I don't think it was because he was at loss for words. Anger was spilling everywhere from him. _

_I couldn't remember anything. _

"_Bella we found Tyler on top of you, you we're both pass out but your skirt was up- Alice explained and I could feel Edward's hands tighten on my shoulders, i flinched but he hold his grip and his stare on me while I was looking at Alice-his hand was…well…his zipper was down and well-" the words wouldn't come out, I widened my eyes, what did I do? _

_There was no much to remember, I shook my head 'no' it was impossible I didn't. _

"_I didn't! I swear!" I started crying looking at Edward who only kept glaring at me. _

"_Tyler?" Jasper spoke. _

"_I cant remember" I heard a snarl coming from Edward and my whole body trembled. I was completely wasted last night, and I only remembered Tyler's company, it was a good company, but I couldn't remember how we got here. _

"_I didn't Edward! I swear!" I cried letting out a sob trying to take his face in my hands, but he shook me roughly not letting me come anywhere near him, I sobbed harder. _

_Next thing I knew Rosalie and Emmet we're in the room worried looks on their faces, Emmet's fist came naturally on Tyler's face, punch him hard in the chin, I cringed, I don't think Tyler had anything to do with this, nothing happen last night. _

"_Emmet don't!" I snapped and I heard Edward's growl even harder, his eyes dark as night. _

"_Ahh" I cried his hands we're gripping me so hard they'll probably emerge bruises in the next 5 minutes. _

"_God-damnit Edward! Let her go! You're hurting her!" Rosalie yelled trying to push Edward off of me. _

"_Im sorry, im sorry!" I trembled, the worst part was I couldn't remember anything, someone thought it was funny to put something in my drink, cause I perfectly knew this was not effects of alcohol, this was definitely something else. _

"_I think it will be best if we take a look Bella" I heard Rosalie hissed at me, but my eyes we're focus on Edward who was still hovering over me like if his eyes we're trying to read any lies, and I was not! Not lying! _

"_I think we should" I felt Alice's hand tugging my shoulder, I cried even harder. _

"_I cant remember! Im sorry!" I covered my eyes with my hands and the next thing I heard was a huge scream and moan coming from Tyler's , Edward's feet had made contact with his stomach kicking him hard. _

"_Stop!" I cried, Rosalie didn't succeeded trying to lift me up, I would not endure this, I had no reason to! Im sure I didn't do anything! I was positive. _

"_No! let go!" I cried shaking their hands off of me. _

_I saw Jasper step in between Edward and Tyler's body before it got too far. _

"_Let go of me!" I yelled "don't touch me!" _

"_You will get up!" Edward ordered. I shook my head 'no', covering my face with my hands, crying harder. _

"_GET UP!" he yelled once again standing over me, I only sobbed harder, Alice sat beside me trying to comfort me with her hands on my back. _

_I leaned over her trying to get away from Edward but his hand gripped my shoulders again and tried to lift me up, I stood my ground and pushed back trying to stay in the bed. _

"_Lets GO!"_

"_No please don't!" I begged. I heard Alice's sob but it could not be compared to mines, it was a sob that she was afraid for me, and at the same time she felt pity towards me. _

"_Let us do it Edward! Please! Let go of her!" Rosalie tried to step in between. _

_Edward's grip in my shoulders did not cede he only pushed me up harder. _

"_EDWARD PLEASE!" Alice cried, Jasper took him out to calm him down a bit while the girls tried to reason with me, but I was not having it, I did nothing of the sort. _

_I panted harder, pressing my hands between my knees, I was not sure of anything anymore. I was only afraid. Edward paced the room behind Rosalie and Alice. _

"_Bells please come with us!" Rosalie took my hand tugging at it. _

"_No, no no no-" I shook my head fiercely. _

"_I will do it for them Bella" his warning came next. It was like if he was giving me an option and if I knew better I would take Rosalie's hand. I didn't. _

"_We need to make sure Bella, please!" Alice sob escaped her mouth. _

"_I didn't, I swear- I cried- I didn't!" _

"_Bella-" they tried to reason with me. _

"_No! I wont" my response was weak, my eyes were already burning and red. _

"_That's it" he was not having it. _

_Next thing I knew I was being toss around his shoulder unwillingly, Alice's sob parted her lips, I kicked and scream up in his arms trying to reach for something to hold on, anything, trying to get out of his grasp, my arms flying everywhere trying to grip tightly the walls, shelves the dorm frame, anything to keep me away from the bathroom and Edward. _

"_Let her go Edward!" Rosalie pleaded following us close with Alice behind her. _

_All of the sudden I was sitting in the marble sink, my back hitting the huge mirror, my hands fight against him trying to keep him away, pushing at his chest, his face, anything to keep him from a good distance from me. Rosalie and Alice didn't dare to move an inch when he was like this, surprise was they we're courageous enough to speak up. _

_His hands parted wide open my legs, but as soon as they we're open I closed them shot again, not giving him free will, he snarled at me, obligating me to keep them open. _

"_DON'T DO THIS!!" I yelled, my hands against his chest, once again my legs we're open and then his rough hands lifted my skirt up all the way, I cried even harder, not only I was afraid, in pain and embarrassed but I was disoriented and afraid to know the answer to everybody's question, even my own. _

_Alice's hand pushed him away but did nothing to his strong force, I closed my legs once again, and once again he parted them wide open harshly. _

"_If you know what's good for you, you'll keep them open!" I cried, I could tell his eyes were watering and his words spilled fear "you had no trouble doing so last night!" _

_And then a slap came his way. _

_As expected. _

_And it was not from me. _

_Alice. _

_I covered my face crying, sobbing hard against my palms, I heard the door close and Rosalie and Alice inspecting me, searching for something they didn't find, conclusion was, Tyler and I just passed out in the bed laughing, and we never crossed the subject again. Ever again. _

That was the first time I lost his trust, he could never forgive me after that, or himself for that matter.


	7. Slaps

**Bella's POV**

"Bella?" i heard Charlie call from the doorway, i lift my hand up not moving an inch from the comfortable couch.

"In here!" I called, next thing I knew he was in my face sitting in the coffee table facing me with a worried look. I gave him a look taking my eyes off of my book, before I could question him he spoke first.

"I was wondering if you would like to go out with me tonight?" he asked hopefully, I smiled at his nervousness. I was about to say yes when he cut me off again.

"Billy invited us for dinner and to watch the game you know…" he stumbled a little on his words, I sighed and sat up.

"Before you can say anything, im not trying to pull anything down your throat or order you to come its just I thought you might wanna use a friend right now, and you know Jake misses you-sigh- and I've notice Edward's not around lately- I groaned loudly begging him to stop- and I just thought it might be a good idea if you could have fun-"

"Dad! Stop!"

"On your own for once"

His words hit me hard, when was the last time I had _real_ fun? Maybe Charlie was right for once, maybe it was time to get back on with my life, I did my moping already maybe I could learn to do my own friends for once, and start over and maybe just maybe with time I could learn to let go of Edward and forget. And forgive.

He saw my hesitation and that would explain his awful wide grin.

I rolled my eyes at him in return I earn a big laugh from him, he knew he had won already, so he started to pick himself up and go to the kitchen.

"I will think about it!" I yelled trying to burst his bubble, but he was already into it cause he was laughing and whistling? Damn! How much hyper he could get?

"Dad im going to take a shower!" I yelled while I jumped the stairs. I heard the ring but I was already in the shower to care.

**Edward's POV**

I had no trouble in tripping the old tree and opening the window of her bedroom, sneaking in and surprise her, like I did so many times when dear old Charlie said it was 'enough' of my company for the day, more like 'he' had enough of me actually. I never got along the old man, and the only reason I was nice it was because he was Bella's dad.

Many of our arguments were due to the fact the pathetic chief Swan was trying so hard to force Jacob Black on Bella's throat and I was not having any of that. I made him know one too many times where Bella's place was, to him and to the whole town of Forks.

But the very first day I let 'him' know that was priceless and still manage to put a smirk on my face. She was so drown to me at the time she did everything to please me, and to be quiet honest I missed the old days, I guess she really got fed up with me this time.

_I knocked on the door waiting for Bella to come out, she was late and once again she made me wait way too long on the car, instead of waiting for her there I decided to come in and make my presence known, I was her boyfriend after all, it was only fair! _

_A growl came out of Charlie when he notice me standing on the porch, I smirked at him, my hands still hiding in the pockets of my jacket. _

"_Edward" he greeted me coldly. I kept smirking at him. _

_Sometimes I wanted so hard to remind him who his daughter was sleeping with. I'd like to picture him thinking about us naked in a same bed, her under me screaming my name at the top of her lungs, I bet he did thought about it, every time he saw me. _

_Whenever I asked Bella if he had any clue she was not a virgin she shrugged her shoulders and blushed, irritated by the subject of thinking if her dad pictured her having sex, she told me talking about it was out of the question and not to give him any ideas, well every time I smirked at him I made a point to remind him I went all the way with Bella, and I mean __**all**__ the way. _

_An accomplished grin printed in my face every time I saw his face I really wanted to scream at him how incredibly hot Bella looked on top of me, I bet if it was Jacob Black to pop her cheery he wouldn't throw a fit or have a heart attach, pfft. Whatever. Fact was she was mine. _

"_Where are you going tonight?" he asked crossing his arms against his chest, he was probably putting the over protective father figure on him, which didn't help much, when Bella spend 24/7 with me, doing anything but watch movies like he thought we did. _

"_Watch movies"_

_I knew he wasn't half stupid to believe that, he was a man, and a young one too, he knew what happened with teenagers, hell Renee and him had Bella in an early age. _

"_I remind you to bring her back by 9, there's school tomorrow and she still has to-" I cut him off, I decided I had enough of him ordering me what to do. _

"_You know there isn't really anything you can say to keep her away from me" he widened her eyes in surprise at my attitude. Good! _

"_Excuse me-" _

"_You know Bella doesn't listen to you, and you're losing her, well more like you already lost her, so all this curfews and keep her in the house all the time doesn't work" I let him know coldly. He grew angry of course. Good! _

_Well I was getting fed up with the curfews and the send her back home earlier and not be allowed on her room, or 5 minutes more with her, I was tired of that bullshit, she was mine, he lost her along time ago when he didn't pay attention to her life and minded his work. Well now there was no turning back, she didn't want anything to do with him. _

_He had made a decision and didn't include her in his life, well then so be it! She was in mines now. _

"_Who the hell-" he began to yell I cut him off. _

"_You know who she belongs to" I snapped. Of course! That was way he was so exasperated. _

"_GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" _

"_We cant both have her sir" my tone was still perfectly respectful but I meant every word I spoke. _

"_OUT-" just right then Bella swung in the room launching herself at me, her arms wrapped around my neck as I lifted her up the floor, my hands on her waist pressing her up against me, I smirked even more at Charlie from her shoulder, he glared at me coldly. If looks could kill! _

_The thin yellow material of her shirt rise up a little when she hugged me, which made her lower back expose itself a little, carefully, gently and possessively I traced my fingers in there slowly going up to caress her back, the whole time I smirked at him, and I could tell he was holding back itself, clenching his jaw. _

_I let him wonder where else did I touch her, how I made her feel, how I fired her up every time I thrust into her, harder each time, I let his mind wonder how she was excited every time she saw me. I was sick, I know. But I liked the feeling of letting him know there was nothing he could do to send her away from me. _

"_Bella get inside!" Charlie snapped infuriated at my cleverness. _

"_What?" she snapped pulling out of me giving him a puzzled look._

"_You're not going anywhere tonight" I stood there smiling, every day I succeeded in taking her away from him, I could say one or two words and then he was doing all the job. _

"_You cannot make me!" she snapped. _

"_I sure can! Im still your father!" he raised his voice. _

"_Oh now you think you are!?" she raised her voice as well, standing her ground, gripping my hand tightly. _

"_Bella-" she cut him off roughly._

"_You cant just wake up one day and say; 'oh okay! Today I decide to care!' it doesn't work that way 'CHARLIE'" she yelled emphasizing coldly his name. _

"_You're still a child, and you're still living down my roof so-" _

"_SO ill move out, I don't think Edward has any problem welcoming me" as the words left her mouth her gaze turned towards me, I simply smirked at her for confirmation. _

"_You know I have no problem doing so, babe" I grinned pressing my lips with her own, I felt Charlie flinch instantly. _

"_I SAID OUT!" he yelled. _

_And as he said that, Bella was closing the door behind herself and gripped my hand tightly walking me to the silver Volvo. I turned my head around to give Charlie a final smirk when he opened the door harshly, letting Bella lead me to the car. He lost her to me along time ago. _

I grinned at the memories at the time she gave herself completely to me, when did I lost her? At the time we could be careless and she would follow my lead, when did she thought to walk in front of me? When did I lost her?

Well I was not losing her, not without a fight first!

When I ring the bell I flinched sure as hell I didn't expect to be that hard. But when I saw Charlie's grin on his face as he crossed his arms against his chest, he already knew he had won. I tried not to lose it and launch myself at him.

"Look what the cat drag in!" he smirked, the same smirk I gave him long time ago, when I was sure I won the war.

"Where's Bella?" calm Edward, that's the best way to go for it.

"She's just getting ready to go out with me down to La Push, just now!" he widened his grin, and I smirked back, not giving him the satisfaction of watching me squirm. Sure as hell she wasn't going anywhere near La Push.

"And you must be loving that!" I grinned. He laughed.

"Well, I know she is! It was all her idea after all!" I gritted my teeth together, preventing a snarl to go out of my mouth, I was not going to lose it here. Remember that Edward!

"May I see her?" I kept it steady and perfected a smile.

"I don't think she'll like that, now if you please-" he was about to close the door in my face but I put my hands on it.

"You know you and even her can keep up with this for one or two days, but it wont be long till she goes back to me, you know that!" I smiled "And when she gets back on the saddle- " I saw him flinch at my pick of words, I laughed, taking advantage of the situation.

"Please! Did you honestly thought she was still 'innocent'?" immediately his hands grasped my jacket holding it tightly and threatening me.

"You little-"

"DAD!"

**Bella's POV**

"…_did you honestly thought she was still 'innocent'?" _

I knew that voice all too well.

"_you little!-"_

That was all it took to set my dad on fire.

"DAD!" I snapped, jumping down the stairs in a swift motion lucky enough I didn't fall, wow, that was a first! I couldn't actually believe the words coming out of his mouth!

"Dad! Let him go! NOW!" I yelled furious. He did so giving Edward a final warning glance, I took my dad's hand and gave him a reassuring look, his eyes never left Edward's though, who I knew perfectly well was smirking from behind me.

I patted my father once again and let him go to the kitchen, that's when I stepped outside and closed the door behind me.

"Took you long enough!" I heard him.

I bet he didn't expect what came over him next, immediately after I turned around I shoved him off with all my force, even if it didn't do much it still pushed him a little giving him the idea of what I had in mind.

"What the hell is wrong with you!?" I hissed giving him a disgusted look.

"There's no way you're going to La Push" I ignored him.

"How could you tell him that!?"

"OH PLEASE!" he let out a frustrated scream "Like if he didn't know how many times I fucked you!"

And then I slapped him, hard, making his face slightly turn around at the punch. I regretted the last time I punched him.

_I was walking down the hall through the crowd trying to find Edward he had skipped second period and when he came back he was a little bit drunk, I was kinda worried and needed to know where he was and if he was okay. When I saw Emmet and Edward making their way through the crowd towards me, I stopped letting them reach me, Edward's face snuggle inside my hair, to my neck. _

_I tried to find his eyes for an explanation of his sudden attitude of why he felt the need to get himself drunk this early in the morning. _

"_What are you doing Edward?" I whispered so only him could hear. He pulled his hands at my neck closing the little gap between us and forcefully put a kiss to my lips, deepening the kiss hungrily for a response I pulled back easily, even if his drunken state didn't help him. He felt to the lockers, I rolled my eyes, he grinned at me motioning me to come forward to him, I did, planting a sweet kiss on top of his lips hoping it will enough for him. _

_It wasn't. _

_Michael Newton came up and whistle to me, I knew Edward catch that and his motions were more demanding then before forcefully trying to slip his tongue inside, his hands roaming under my skirt, and after a certain detention he got a few weeks ago I was not about to stop him. _

_He was making sure to Mike and every other guy in the room I was his, and nobody should dare to even glance my way, or even breathe the same air. I was intoxicated by his kiss when I felt Emmet's voice bring me back to present and what we we're doing in the middle of the school hallway. _

"_Geez, piss on her already" Emmet laugh and I rolled my eyes pulling back and taking his hands out off my ass for good. I ignored the warning glance he gave me while he pressed his hips with mines. _

_I caught the glare he send me before answering Emmet's comment. _

"_I should seeing she doesn't seem to get the point" _

_Pfft. I tsked. _

"_I did something a lot similar the other night though" he smirked, I immediately turn my head towards him and gave him the coldest glare I could muster. _

_Emmet laughed he was getting the point, and made other were paying attention too. _

"_She quiet enjoyed it" he grinned at me moving my hips to his. I was shocked, no words would come out. _

"_What did it taste like!?" and then I slapped him hard! _

_I ignored the fact he was drunk and that he would probably take back the words by tomorrow and be sorry about them, I ignored that, because I was getting enough of it. So I slapped him. Hard. _

_But as soon as my hand was red I regretted it immediately, his face turn around to me coldly, his eyes were dark as night, and I was afraid, I instantly launched myself at him and kissed his cheek trying to make the pain go away, trying to redeem myself, it did nothing to his growing need to humiliate me some more. Or to his anger. _

"_Get in the car Bella" he ordered darkly, I flinched. His hands rested on his hips leaning closer to me, towering me. _

_I tensed and tried to move, but my feet were glued to the floor, my eyes never left his, as I tried once again to kiss him and make everything go away, but it was too late he was angry. _

"_Get in the car now, Bella" his voice was calm, but I notice the dark venom in them. I gulped and ran past him towards the lot, my face facing the floor. _

"_C'mon stop that!" Emmet tried to stop Edward putting a hand to his chest so he would let it go, but he walk past him not giving him a second glance his stare was too busy burning a hole through my head. _

_******************************************************************_

**Author's note****: how much did you hate it? Lmao. I know he's an ass, I like assy Edward, and I just wanted to let you guys know it will take a long in him to change, or to stop being such an ass! Im sorry! ******** haha****. I think I would let you know in my next chapter what happens after Bella slaps him, the first and the second time :D only if you want to**** xD hehe.**

**Thank you once again for the amazing replies you guys send me, and to add this story to favorites who ever did should check themselves out xD Thanks for the support. **


	8. Butcher

**Author's Note****: **WOOW those replies :O thank you very much for all the love ive been getting

**Guys****; I have this ****new story****, so if you guys are into ****dark****Edward ****can you guys check it out? Its called "****TO LIVE****" I promise it will worth your time :) I have big plans for that one, with many Edward dark hotness. :D soo can you ****pretty please ****take a look and let me know your thoughts? :) thank you!**

Oh and please people remember flashbacks are in _italics_.

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_When we step out of the school parking lot everything was silent, he gripped tightly the steering wheel and I swear at any minute he will rip it off, he was thinking, analyzing the situation probably try to find the worst angle to hurt me, he'll probably succeeded like he always do. _

_The speed meter went high and higher, 100… 120…130…I was getting scared, I never liked how he drive, I was scared all the time, I tried to close my eyes but it was worse I couldn't see the road and it did nothing to my nerves. _

_So I spoke up. _

"_Edward please" my words broke in my mouth. _

"_What is wrong with you Bella?" his hand gripped my tight, rubbing his thumb forcefully in circles. _

_I stared at him, how did this became my fault? _

"_You got in my last nerve Edward!" I snapped furious snatching his hand away disgusted, not at his touch but at the situation. _

_But as soon as his hand was in the air it was back down on my tights higher up now. _

"_How many times do I have to warn you not to hit me?" _

"_Then stop harassing me and embarrassing me in front of everyone!-" _

"_You do know how horrible you look hitting someone?-" I glared at him one more time-"makes you look like a tomboy, like a butcher" _

"_Ok, enough- you know what,- this" I stumbled on my words, the nerve of this guy! _

"_Its bad enough you dress like one, but you have to go act like one too? What's next spitting out your gum?" _

"_WILL YOU STOP IT?" _

"_Im not dating a fucking butcher Bella, so I suggest you began to behave properly!" _

"_Stop the car!" tears threatened to fell out of my eyes, never in my entire 18 years old of life had I felt so humiliate it and wrong at the same time. _

"_I have to stand it from Alice, but not with you Bella"_

"_Stop the car!" my voice was calm but demanding. _

"_Why you feel like grinding-?" before he could finish the sentence I opened the passenger door which brought him to halt in the breaks immediately. _

"_WHAT THE HELL, BELLA-" but I was already out of the car and slamming the door shut behind me, walking back us. _

_I heard his own door slam shut and instead of keep walking I decided to side track and stop near by a tree, I needed time on my own to calm down, and I was not getting it with him screaming at me to go back in the car or tossing me around his shoulder. _

_I hide my face away from him, covering it with my hands, making sure he didn't catch any of my tears and thought I was just mad, of course he didn't buy any second of it. _

"_Don't cry Bella" his voice was soft, but was somehow restraining anger and irritation, I knew him far well to notice this. _

_A car pulled over and then Ben's voice was heard. _

"_Hey Edward!" _

_Edward gave him a nod of his head, not really in the mood to deal with him right now. _

"_Is that..- Bella?" he called out to me. _

_I didn't care to turn around, if he was smart enough the situation will kick in and will realize it was not the time for greetings. _

"_Hey!- Edward once again greeted taking Ben's full attention now-We're kinda in the middle of something Ben-" he said apologetic. _

"_Oh sure, im sorry, I was on my way to Angela's"- he stopped rambling while turning the engine on once again. And then he was gone. _

_I heard Edward sigh loud and then his strong arms embracing my tiny frame from behind, I sobbed harder and my chest did splints, he felt it and tensed, I felt his hot breath down my neck. _

"_Im sorry" I tried to shake his hands off of me roughly, "try" being the key word. _

"_Im sorry im an ass!" he apologized and he seemed sincere for the first time "Ive been going through some stuff-" _

"_And WHY IN THE WORLD do I have to be your punching bag!?" I snapped furiously trying hard to take his hands away, resisting his embrace. _

"_I know its not fair to you-"_

"_Well you keep doing it Edward!" I yelled turning around to face him, his face became serious "And im done with it" _

_The words were out there that was the first time I had made a decision in dumping his ass, but the minute the words were out of my mouth I didn't dare to put meaning into them and he ignored them just as I did. _

"_Lets just calm down and go home" his eyes were pleading, and grasped my hand tightly leading his way to the Volvo. _

_I spend the whole afternoon crying, in the car, in his house, in his room, I was deeply hurt and all he could say in his favor was that he wasn't himself and he wont do it again. _

_Emmet came into the room right after he got home, and just to make sure I was okay, he saw me crying in the right side of the bed crawl in a bed with Edward by my side trying to wait for me to calm down, but tonight nothing could keep me calm, I was offended and embarrassed. _

"_What the hell Edward!" Emmet's voice sounded irritated and mad, he was standing up for me how he used to do. _

"_Leave Emmet" came Edward's response. _

"_You're an ass!" he raised his voice. _

_Edward stare at his hands hidden in his lap and say nothing more, I could feel Emmet was gone when the door closed, then Edward put himself behind me so I was in between his legs, his arms wrapped themselves around my tiny waist and his lips touched my shoulder carefully while I soothed down my sobs. _

"_I had a fight with Carslile" I was hearing but I didn't look up once at him "He wants me to talk to my…"dad" his voice changed from worried to angry when he mentioned "dad" I knew he was adopted hell, every one at the Cullen family were adopted! But this was the first time I've heard him talk about his past relatives. _

_I was paying attention now, my eyebrows furrow together and my hand came down his cheek reassuring him I was here so he could keep talking, that night Edward told me how he threatened to leave the house if they made him even see that 'guy' that dumped him along time ago, and to my surprise and his Carlisle reassured him if he didn't talk to his dad he would be the one kicking him out, it lasted for along time and I heard him patiently giving my 2 cents from now and then, and for the first time I felt we we're really a couple, and it was not one sided, where I talked and he pretended to listen, this time we we're discussing his life and what was bothering him, eventually he took my hands in his and kissed them lightly. _

"_Im really sorry" he whispered maybe afraid of hearing himself, it might irritate him, well if he wasn't ready to hear himself messed up then that was okay, it will take some time to get there. That's fine as long as someday will happen. _

_It never did. _

His eyes remained closed for a long time and for the first time in months I wasn't frightened to see what color they were, probably pitch black, and surprisingly I was okay with that if he was mad or enraged. I was not gonna make myself responsible over it again. Not ever again.

"You're done bashing me?" I demanded furious.

He towered over me menacing and firmly I held his darkened gaze.

"I just wanna have a word with you" he hissed between teeth I could sense the anger behind it.

"Well you can stick your word where the sun doesn't shine as far as I care EDWARD!" I turned around to go back home but his hand stopped my moves instantly turning me back to face him.

"Stop doing that!!" he raised his voice, but I notice something in his eyes, they were concerned worried almost, like the last time we talk in school when he understood I was completely serious in my decision and I was not backing down. He was afraid.

I sighed. This was going to be hard for me if he was gonna be like that. I took his hand and lead him on the stairs of the porch nudging him to sit down, I plopped down beside him.

"I need space Edward, I cant be with you right now"

"Why?" he cut me off.

"Because I want to be alone" I went for the safe choice.

"Then be alone with me" he grinned inching his way closer to my face his lips almost pressing mines, I turned my face around and glanced the other way, he was tempting me.

"I don't want to see you with another one" I couldn't reach his eyes, he was not gazing or fixing me, his eyes were everywhere but with me, they were far out of my reach. His hand gripped mine while he spoke.

"I cant stand to see you with someone else, so if there is someone el se Bella i-" I cut him off.

"There is no one else Edward" my words broke, hurt at his thoughts.

"Then stay with me! Don't leave me Bella, I need you!" he pleaded, he was not helping me at all.

"I cant be with you Edward! YOU'RE NOT THE GUY I FELL IN LOVE WITH!" I cried out, he sighed exasperated, the frustration evident in his eyes and even if I tried hard to reach them they would not glance twice my way.

And all of the sudden his breath was on my neck, snuggling closer like he used to do a lot of times after sex, his lips laying butterflies kisses on it, I tried not to flinch or let out any emotion, but it was hard, it brought back the good old memories, I turned around my face hoping to get away from it, but he turned my face around and crashed his lips on my own, I didn't answer back even if I wanted to, I was in pain, I couldn't believe he was doing this to me.

He bit down my lower lip, in that awful way he knew how to turned me on and then he stared deeply in my eyes.

"You're done?" I didn't want to speak the words I didn't want to let them out, but I needed to for my own good, even if it hurt me, even if I didn't want him to stop, even if I wanted him to take me in his arms and carry me out of here.

He bit his lip and got up I soon followed him out to his car, he notice the tear strolling down my eye and he kissed it away. Whispering a few words when he did so;

"I'll see you later Bella, but do us a favor and dont go to La Push tonight, I don't want to cause you any more pain" I hold back the sob that tried to escape my lips, he was threatening me again.

He tugged at my shirt and gave me a final kiss in the forehead and with that he was gone.

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_HES SUCH AN ASS! But in the next chapter ill have sweet Edward! _

Guys please remember checking out my other story TO LIVE. I have nice ideas for that one :) 


	9. Stop asking! Demand!

**Author's Note: **thank you very much for all of your support guys means a lot :D you're awesome have a happy holidays!

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**Edward's POV: **

I had a hard time processing what was happening, everything went down hill with Bella, she was serious this time, dead serious and I was hating every second of it. I had to do something drastic cause nothing was work with her.

I had tried to keep it cool, I didn't ambush her on the hallways, I didn't scream or yell, I didn't raise my voice, I asked nicely to talk to her she said no, well fine, then I went to her home and…well…I kinda might have said something to her dad, put her on the spot light…but…he was asking for it, ok fine, but I tried to talk to her! I had tried to have a conversation with her and she wouldn't give me the time of the day, and then she slapped me!

Slap in the face! Like a damn tomboy! I wanted so hard to pin her against the wall and make her take it back, so she would make it up for me…in more then one way. I fought the urge to take her back to my home when I had to leave.

It would cost me nothing to toss her around my shoulder and drag her all the way back to my house, but I was trying not to push her, I did my best and what did she do? She's going out to stick her tongue down that puppy's mouth. I was not having it if Bella went to La Push I would stop trying to talk to her and just have my way with her, wouldn't care about her warnings or punches I would take her with me.

While I was debating with myself I walked down the stairs knocking on Emmet's door while I did so, he came out of it with his car keys in hand and his coat, perfect.

"What is it that we're doing then?"

"Call Jasper and the guys" calmly I spoke taking my phone in my hand so I could make my own call. That would decide how the rest of the evening will unfold.

"_Hello?" _

"Is she there?"

"_Oh man- the voice in the other end whined-You know im not a snitch! And why do you care anyways?"_

"Don't fuck with me Clearwater, is she there or not?"

"_Look…stay put don't do anything rush please! Do you seriously think this is the best way to work it out-" _

"Seth put your sister on the phone" I demanded cutting him off rudely.

"_Edward man, c'mon…is this really how we're gonna spend our night? You calling all the time to see if-" _

"Put your sister on the phone Seth" I raised my voice gaining attention from Esme.

"_She's not here yet but she is coming"_ I recognized that voice as Leah's. I could hear in the other end Seth complaining to her _"You're such a bitch you know that?"_

That was all it took I hang up with not another word and took my keys in my hand.

"So kidnapping sounds about right?" Emmet ask me ready to roll.

"Im not sure right now" before I could say anything else Esme was on our way.

"Im not letting you guys go" simply she called out. I sighed and laughed, Emmet sighed he always had a hard time standing up to Esme or Carslile he always wanted to keep it respectful and nice, I had no problem in snapping when I was furious so I didn't give a damn really.

"Im going anyways" I smiled, she dropped the hard stare and focus her eyes in me trying to reason with mine, but my mind was made up a long time ago.

"Why don't you try to calm down and work out for another way to get to her, cause obviously what you're doing its not working and its wrong!"

"Obviously it doesn't matter, cause im not hearing any of it"

"Edward c'mon!" Emmet snapped at me, apparently I was being to harsh.

"NO" I snapped.

"Sit down Edward!" I heard Rosalie's voice called out from the stairs.

"If I have to do this alone I sure as hell will" that was clearly directed to Emmet, he sighed, he didn't wanted to leave me alone but didn't want to put himself at dangerous with the rest of the family, I was in another world seeing only red, and Bella was white, I needed to see her and make her understand I needed her in my life.

"You're not thinking this through! Maybe you could just play nice and romantic for one night so we wouldn't have to ambush her all the time!" he snapped.

"He's got a point!" that was Alice.

"If I wanted for your opinion I would have asked" I glared at her.

"Sit down a minute Edward" Jasper took me by my shoulder, how did the tables turn around? First they had my back and now they were doing anything to piss me off.

"Are we ready or what?" Ben asked from the door with the rest of the guys, apparentely they notice the sudden discomfort cause next thing they we're standing back outside.

"We'll just be over here in case-" I cut him off.

"Im ready to go!" I stepped in but Jasper was on my way giving me a stern look.

"Wait a minute" Rosalie mumbled apologetic to Ben and the rest of the guys closing the door behind them as he nodded.

They sat me down to the couch and tried to get through me, I heard countless of stories and how I could win her back, how they could help me and how they we'll be willing to help me without the strict measures I insisted to put, I sat back down and listened every offer, every comment and every suggestion, I leaned back and kept quiet and for the first time **listened**.

_My hands wanted nothing more then to explore every inch of her body but instead settled to lift her face to my own so I would gain her eyes on mine, looking at my eyes she noticed I was serious about what I said, I wanted her to come with me to Alaska for the summer and I wanted her to try hard and do anything to convince her father, cause I wouldn't be able to take it if she wasn't with me, I wanted the rest of my family to know her and I wanted her to be with me when I had to…see 'him', somehow the conversation got too serious and it was all silenced when I told her I wanted her for good in my life and for a true commitment, she thought I was kidding and I would just move on with another line but instead I took her face to hold my gaze and told her I loved her. _

"_Today, tomorrow and so on" _

_I kept kissing her lips like if it was the last time I would, slowly savoring them like if it was the very first time, my tongue demanded entrance and didn't wait for acceptance it urged its way down her mouth tasting every inch of her as my body leaned forward towards hers, when I pulled forward she leaned back making her lay on her back in the bed, responding every demand my mouth had over hers right now, just the way I like it. _

_I moved so I was straddling her lap, parting her legs apart with my rough hands I made way between her legs and towered over her like I did many times, I knew where and how this make out session will end, and I was glad for it, it has been days since we hadn't done the deed and I was growing in patient, I was in serious need for her and she had been doing nothing but tease me lately. _

_Tonight I was not having it. _

_She grinned between my lips when she noticed my furious arousal, I didn't smirk or grin my face was serious my lips tight in a hard line, my eyes were pitch black filled with lust I needed her bad tonight. She noticed and she gave me the most beautiful smile and eyes I could ever ask for, I wasn't sure if I deserve them but they were there. Those eyes that told me she was going all the way with me tonight, right here in this moment. _

_I leaned my forehead against her breathing her same air, starring the whole time at her lips, I rocked my hips forward pressing down on her while I watched her eyes closely for her reaction she gasped and squeeze her eyes shut at the feeling, but I was having none of it. _

"_No, no, open your eyes Bella" a light pink brushed her cheeks when she held my darkened gaze. _

_Slowly my hands travel to the button of her jeans, undoing it slowly without a hesitation, when my hands slipped inside it she flinched I noticed her hesitation but dismiss it, no matter how dangerous grounds we've been through together she will still be shy about me pleasuring her. _

_Her hand took mine when my fingers barely grazed her already wet lips. _

"_C'mon lets just do it already, you're killing me-" she blushed, she was uncomfortable with it but it only pushed me to be persistent about it, I wanted to see her squirm under me, to see her moan in pleasure while I satisfied her. _

"_None of that- I cut her off- I want you to come for me" as expected she turned her head around blushing like mad, her chest accelerating moving up and down like if she had already reached ecstasy. _

_My other hand gripped her face, turning her face around to face me once again. _

"_Edward, why do you have to be so demanding? Why everything has to go your way? Why cant you just drop it-" but I cut her off sliding one finger inside her, her words hand loosely on the air, I grinned when she gasped and bit her lower lip, I knew she was trying to hold her emotion, trying to keep them in check and I also knew she was having a hard time doing so. _

_Quickly I fitted a second finger inside, her hips bucked instantly and I smirked working my way faster, all of the sudden her phone rings, my actions didn't dwell once. _

"_The phone" she managed to say between gasps of breath. _

"_Ignore it" I demanded nibbling her neck furiously. And it was soon forgotten, the beep of the answering machine echoed in the room. _

'_**We're not home right now..'**_

"_Edward" she moaned louder, I felt her about to come so I took my hands out she groaned and I smiled. _

"_Don't worry love I'll quickly make it up for you with something thicker" I smirked on her lips, she giggled. _

"_But not much longer right?" she teased I smirked at her giving her a warning look. _

"_Hey! May I need to remind you?" _

'…_**please leave your message' **_

_This time when I kissed her I was raving her mouth so hard I wanted nothing more then slip right now inside of her as I undid my pants. _

"_Bella is dad…look-" the voice started as I dragged her hand to feel my erection she gasped I smirked. _

"_C'mon quit, I should pick up-" I shook my head 'no'. _

"_I was just calling to tell you-" _

"_Edward!" she laughed with a whim "I cant do this with my father online c'mon!" she laughed, I grasped her hand tightly to my shaft and I had to shut my eyes in pleasure at the feel of her tiny hand grasping my very hard member. _

"_nana's…well..she…is very bad, she's at the center hospital, she collapsed and" _

_Then she took her hand away and I had to gather myself for a minute to realize what had happen, to figure out what had just hit me. She pushed me aside and stalked her way back up to the bed taking the phone in her shaking hands, tears welling up in her eyes. _

"_She's gonna make it right?" she asked in the verge of tears, I felt a sting in the back of my chest, worried as hell I sat beside her holding her hands tightly, reassuring her I was here and not leaving nowhere… _

_Nowhere…_

_And now she was the one leaving me. _

_After her grandmother passed away Bella pushed me away for weeks, she didn't let me see her or talk to her, she missed school several days and snapped at me several times in the middle of the night, calling me all sorts of names, but then one day I found her on my bed after I came from school, her hands covered her face her elbows resting on her tights while her legs plopped down stretched on the bed, I didn't need an explanation or an answer, I put my bag down along with my keys and dropped down with her both of my legs in each side of hers, hugging her in a tight embrace from behind, my arms crossed over her chest below her breasts bringing them up at the same time with her arms, my chest pressed down her back, she cried hard that night sobbing and panting for along time, and I just held her all night reassuring her everything was gonna be ok. _

I knew I was an ass a good part of my time but damn I had my moments! And I perfectly well knew she was only going down to La Push to annoy the crap out of me and I was not allowing that! Ever!

She wanted to play it harsh well then I might as well do the same! I had enough of trying to talk her out of it, trying to persuade her to reason with me, and give me a second glance, well I might as well take manners in my own hands.

I sighed one more time, putting my hands to my face, hearing the last of Esme's and Emmet's warnings. What was I going to do?

**Bella's POV:**

"And then he asked me straight forward if I was gay!? WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?" Quill snapped as every one followed in an eruption of laughs and giggles, my own laugher escaped my lips while hearing yet another funny story from the guys, we were all sitting at the bonfire hanging out and telling stories and I don't quiet remember the last time I had fun like this, instead of just going to another random party grinding and having sex, this was definitely different, this I could handle in my life, I was shy and quiet down to earth Bella and bonfires in the top of a mountain sounded just about right to me.

I snuggled myself closer, wrapping my arms around me when the cold breeze of the night brushed me, when I felt a coat wrapping in my shoulders I looked up to see Jacob offering me a smile, I took the coat willingly and responded with a shy and kind of embarrassed smile, he winked at me and sat down next to me, he didn't notice the stare I was giving to him while he talked about the night they crashed into their high school looking for Embry stuck in the janitor's closet when he was trying to get the cheat test of the next exam, and I was glad he didn't caught me watching him either, don't get me wrong my feelings weren't mixed or anything I loved Edward Cullen with everything in me, but I had a strong feeling for Jacob and I was grateful that through everything I had put him through after everything I had done to him he could still sit beside me and laugh about silly jokes and pranks.

I was and will always be eternally grateful for his friendship, but in the back of my mind I knew I had to be careful not to put anything to the mix or give him wrong impressions I didn't want to hurt him more then I already did. All I could give him was my friendship, no matter how much Charlie wanted otherwise, or how much Jake did, or Billy, or hell how much Edward thought I did.

I was already stoned by a bronze hair and brown eyed boy and that would be my one regret.

I went to the small kitchen Billy and Jake shared on their house and neared Charlie who was with the rest of the grown-ups.

"Hey you" he called stretching his hand out for me to reach, gladly I took his hand in mine and gripped it tightly, he gripped me closer and pulled me down to whisper something in my ear.

"Having fun?"

I rolled my eyes, he really wanted to push me at all the chances he got to spend time here…with Jake.

"Im talking to you! How more fun can I get?" I grinned trying to tease him a little. He rolled his eyes at me.

"Whatever!" I laughed at his attempt to come out at me like a teenager, he was my dad after all! It was a rule to disagree with your parents! Period!

My laugh was cut off by strange noises on the porch where I was just minutes ago with the gang, I heard bang noises and horns of cars, and blasting music through stereos. My chest rouses heavily, in fear and expectation.

I stood calm by Charlie it was probably just a hallucination of mines, I was stressed and couldn't take my mind off of Edward.

But then I heard it again, horns and strange shouts on the entrance, my eyes searched in fear for Charlie's brown eye balls and they were just as confused as mines, I patted his shoulder letting him know I'll check out to see what was all the fuss about.

When I neared the doorway I only saw Edward's hands roughly shoving Jacob off of his face, I took a load of breath but I couldn't help my legs to shake, snap out of it Bella! You have to put an end to this, the rest of the gang was already on his feet preparing themselves for a fist fight!

"Bellaa BOO!!" Emmet's voice sang along with some laughs.

Damn!

When I saw Jacob immediately stand up again on his feet I put my brain into overdrive and started making my way outside, standing between the two before it got more hectic.

"Bella Boo boo boo!" Emmet sang loudly over the music, I knew he was drunk out of his ass.

"Stop it!" I pointed to Jacob to start anything, the only thing they we're searching was a fight and I was not letting them hurt Jacob, I was not letting Edward get away with it, he couldn't just come and interrupt this reunion because he felt like it.

Edward was grinding from behind me and instantly I backed away turning my furious gaze to him now.

"What the hell do you think you're doing!?" my eyes gave him pretty much a view of how upset I was right now.

"Hey Bella c'mon! Its not a party if someone doesn't crash it!" Emmet shot out loud, ignoring him it was easy and I was still waiting for an answer.

"I warn you not to come-"

"I warn you to stay out of it-"

"Well im tired of asking favors!" he snapped angrily, this new attitude of him amused me, he was angry as far as I knew, his attitude didn't match the one I found him in earlier at the porch of my house.

He really have some balls to come at me like that! Well I was not having it!

"You know there's something else you can ask the door shut in your face, get out of here NOW!" I snapped back.

"I will! right behind ya'" he towered over me protesting fervently, his hand pulled me harshly towards his hard chest, which brought up multiple complaints from Jacob and the La Push gang, Jacob took one step closer ready to bit the hell out of Edward, but Edward had people on his back, and they were all waiting the moment to get into it.

I squirmed under his pressure pulling at his chest, his eyes never left mine and if I knew better he was trying to tell me something, he was like warning me to not put a fight and follow him, I shook my head fiercely.

"Let go of my daughter Edward" Charlie's voice called from the doorway and right there I knew we had our own audience. My eyes begged to Edward to just let me go and move on.

I didn't wanna do this right now or ever! He was embarrassing me yet again, and my father was here! What was he trying to get at?

He didn't let go of me even if I twitched and squirmed under him, trying to push him away. He was holding my gaze sternly.

"Leave Edward" I whispered to him kindly, so I wouldn't expose him in front of everyone.

"I will once you're in my car and ready to go" he hissed.

"C'mon Bella lets just goo! I wanna goo!" Emmet shouted out loud trying to kiss Rosalie who was sitting uncomfortably on her seat.

"If you pull me out of here like this I will NEVER be able to forgive you" I warned him he shook his head with a shrug.

"Kinda like last week when you begged me to take you?" he smirked I gave him a glare.

"Stop it"

"Let go of her!" Charlie called out for one last time.

"Stop dad!" I warned, he was only making it worse, eventually Edward did let go of me but he sat on the hood his hands resting in each side of body hid head hang lowly I tried to reach his eyes but I had a difficult time, all I knew if I didn't talk to him I would let this party go down into a fight and probably more screaming I knew what I had to do, I had to follow him and sit back and talk…yell about this.

I looked up at Jacob with an apologetic look, and I was about to say something when I heard.

"C'mon Bella, get in the car" he sing song, I shook my hands in the air to put my thoughts together, what should I do?

"Jake im sorry, I'll call you" he sighed and turned away from "Please! Hear me out!" he turned around forcefully eying me.

"What do you have to say to me Bella?" he snapped.

"Get in the car now Bella" I ignored him.

I made my way towards Jacob and gave him a hug whispering some words on his ear.

"_Im not going back there" _

I turned around to Charlie giving him a reassuring look, telling him everything will be okay and I had it under control.

"Bella don't-" but I was already making my way towards the Volvo and the rest of the guys.

"ALRIGHT!" Emmet shouted loud and turn his engine on, I stepped in and Edward followed close behind me opening the door for me with a serious look on his face I sat down the passenger seat and waited till he made his way on his own seat to drive at an a ridiculous speed.


	10. Slipping Away

Charlie immediately stood up from the couch once he saw me come in, setting my keys on the table by the entrance. I smiled at him, reassuring everything was fine. Well, scratch that actually.

Everything was not fine, but soon it would be.

I took several steps closer and hugged him begging him not to start a conversation or ask me any questions. I really didn't feel like talking or answering anything about how I felt.

I was torn between what I wanted and what I needed. I wanted Edward to realize I was breaking every time he treated me like badly. I wanted him to understand I was fed up with his attitude. I wanted Jacob to remember me as a friend. I wanted Charlie to be proud of me. I felt all of this yet at the same time I wanted to take Edward back because I need him and I wanted him. I wanted to feel his strong protective arms around me. I wanted his lips to dance along with my own.

Was it wrong to say I missed him? Because I did, every second of every day. Nights like these stuck in my mind when we would just pass the time fooling around in the back seat of the Volvo.

But what about what I needed? I needed a new start for once. I needed someone that wouldn't have multiple temperamental mood swings of temper. I needed someone that wasn't angry all the time and wouldn't make me feel like a lesser person. I needed someone stable at my side that could be supportive when I needed them to, not bring me down.

"Bella, I'm putting an end to this for you," Charlie warned once I stood back up. I sighed. My night was far from over. "I'm going to talk to Carlisle . . ."

"Edward hardly listens to his dad" I said cutting him off.

"Then I'll make him understand to stay away from you for good!"

I sighed through his warning. "Dad don't!"

He watched my face carefully.

"Stay out of it!" I asked, harsher then I wanted to.

"How can I?" he said raising his voice. "I'm your father for god sakes! He's not . . ."

"Gonna stop!" I finished for him. His eyes were glued to mine, I was serious and he knew it.

"Bella . . ."

"Do you ever stop to think that maybe I want him around? You're not doing this because Edward is stalking me, you're doing this because you always wanted Jacob for me and you're forcing it down my throat Charlie!"

"Bella for god sakes the guy is completely out of it . . ."

"Edward's behavior is just your poor excuse so you can finally put an end to it."

"He won't step a foot in this house!" he snapped as he stormed out of the room. I sighed in frustration, I was yet again on someone else's "I hate you" list. _Great._

_Once Edward stormed out of La Push everything was dead silent. My eyes never left the window, so I sat gazing at the trees watching as they passed by faster and faster. I didn't even look at the speedometer; it was probably at 170 by now. I didn't make an effort to care. _

"_I tried to warn you to stay out of La Push, Bella," Edward breathed out. _

"_I wasn't aware I was dealing with a 5 year old," I whispered to myself but it was loud and clear enough for him to hear. Good. _

"_What was that?" he snapped daring me to speak up again. So I did. _

"_You're a 5 year old! Didn't you catch it the first time or do you need me to spell it out for you?" I said calmly turning to catch his glare. _

"_What the hell is wrong with you?" _

_I chuckled, the nerve of him. _

"_Edward, stop the car will you?" _

"_Oh yeah, I'm gonna do that!" he snapped sarcastically. _

"_Stop the car Edward! You wanted to talk, lets talk!" _

"_We will once we're back home," he mumbled. _

_I shook my head . "Don't even go there Edward! You're not taking me to your home," _

_He laughed bitterly. _

"_Give me a reason why I shouldn't," he chuckled. _

"_Because I'm not planning to walk home." _

"_You won't have to. I'll get you back safely in the morning . . ."_

"_I have no intention whatsoever of spending the night with you Edward!" I cut him off rudely. I couldn't believe this guy! If he thought he could work his way back into bed with me that easily after all the shit he put me through, he had another thing coming. _

"_Just give me 5 minutes in the same room," he winked at me giving me that fucking grin on his face, inviting me to say otherwise. _

"_Stop the car Edward," I sighed, exhausted of his game. _

"_Why? Can't you wait until we get there?" _

_Once again I ignored his smart ass comment and let it slide because he actually pulled the car over, Suddenly, Emmett's face appeared at the window. _

"_Go on we'll catch up to you later," Edward spoke giving him a nod. Emmett grinned widely and then made a sign for the other guys to move their butts. _

_Kicking Emmett's butt was definitely on my list once this was over with. _

_As every car drove past us, I noticed ANGELA sitting next to Ben in his car – TRAITOR! I glared at her and all she gave me was an apologetic smile. I knew she wasn't to blame, I've been caught in that position with Edward before. _

_Finally, once all the cars were gone he turned to me. _

"_So . . . Jacob? How is he? Did I leave the two of you alone long enough or is he really slow?" he gave me an apologetic grin. I shook my head with a sad smile grace my lips._

_I knew he thought my behavior was odd. He expected me to snap at him, yell, scream and kick. But I wasn't going to let him get to me again. Every time he spoke, he was only disappointing me further. Actually, he was making it easier for me to let him go._

"_You do know you're only making this easier for me?" I continued sadly. I never thought Edward and I would end up like this. I always thought he would fight me if we broke up but not like this. I wanted him to be truthful to himself and realize how he treats me. I wanted him to really try and make it up to me. It never got there. _

_His eyebrows furrowed together in confusion. _

"_You know, playing the asshole role only makes me realize I that it was a good thing that I dumped you," I snapped and he grew furious._

"_Bella I swear to god . . ."_

"_Stop threatening me Edward, its not working!" _

"_YOU don't leave me any other choice BELLA!" he snapped furiously. "You're slipping away from me and there's nothing I can do anymore!" I caught the glint in his eyes; it was sad - really sad. _

"_You never tried!" I laughed, my own eyes watering. _

"_Bella, I want you with me!" he turned his face away so I wouldn't see his eyes. _

"_Edward . . ." _

"_I WANT YOU . . .," he stopped talking, trying to soothe his voice. He was really trying to remain calm but it was not working. ". . . to end this bullshit. I want you back, I want you to stop putting me through this . . ." _

"_EDWARD! I only want what's best for the BOTH of us!"_

"_OH, the BOTH OF US?" he raised his voice. _

"_YES!" I snapped "Can't you see you're over the edge? YOU'RE LOSING IT EDWARD!"_

"_OHH, so now I'm crazy!" he laughed. _

"_Ugghh," I groaned in frustration. He was just mocking me now. At this point, I jumped out of the car slamming the door behind me. He followed me right at the same time, he could still read my moves before me. _

_I took my hands in my face trying to understand what to do next, when I felt his hands tugging at my jacket pulling me closer towards his body which was sitting silently over the hood of the Volvo. _

"_Edward, don't even!" I pleaded so he would give me some time alone. He sighed, as I pulled away from his touch. _

"_Fine," he mumbled under his breath, making his way back to the car again. _

_I took my time, I still had to analyze the whole situation. And even with back to him, I could feel his eyes boring in to me, almost burning a hole right through me. He was never the one to take defeat or rejection, it was a surprise to me he let me go when I told him I wanted to be alone. _

_I couldn't stay away from him too long though. Slowly I dragged my feet back towards the car. And I wasn't surprised when I opened the driver's door where he sat watching me. As I opened his door, he turned towards me so his legs were out of the car and offered his hands to me. I took them and didn't hesitate when he pulled me to his lap, he sighed in contentment smelling my hair and letting his hot breath down my neck. _

_I also sighed taking his hands in my own and rubbing my thumb across his palm. His chin was resting on my shoulder. _

"_You can't keep me away from you Bella," he breathed. I felt he was sorry when he said this but not completely. "You're the only thing that I've done right," he pressed. _

"_OH, so you've DONE me huh?" I teased laughing, but he hugged me tightly to his chest from behind. _

"_I'm serious Bella!" and his voice confirmed his words. I turned around to face him and moved a leg around him so I was straddling his waist. I noticed the surprise on his face and, to be honest, I surprised myself by this action but I was just following what I wanted now, my own desire. My hands intertwined themselves when I wrapped my arms around his neck, his eyes never leaving mine. They were filled pitch black with desire yet at the same time they were threatening to overflow with sadness. _

"_If you want me back, why don't you just try to be . . ." he cut me off attacking my lips, not harsh though just intense and needy, as if he was tempting me to follow him but this time I wanted to. _

_I felt my own lips pressed over his, moving along and then his tongue traced my upper lip asking for permission. I gladly give him access and now he was turning us around making me fall into him with the steering wheel against my back; the door closed and his arms that were wrapped around my waist tightened even more. _

_His forehead rested above mine, his lips parting from me with only our heavy breathes breaking through the silence. _

"_I need you with me Bella, today, tomorrow, the next day and so on, remember?" I smiled, remembering the last time he said this to me, it was more then just words, it was a promise. _

"_I can't be with you like this!"_

_He cut me off once again but this time it was a little bit rough. I knew he was getting frustrated but I couldn't help it. If we were doing this I needed to something real in the morning, and not just a promise. _

_His lips pressed hard over mine making up for all the time lost. His tongue took mine and started a war of its own. I was pulling in towards him clenching and fisting my hands in his hair, arching my back to reach over him but he pushed me right back down letting me feel his hard arousal, letting me feel all of him. I moaned in pleasure while he took my neck in his mouth ravishing it, while his hand kept a death grip on my hips, his hard manhood almost coming through his pants. _

_I took his face in my hands parting my lips from him. _

"_I cant . . ." I said as he growled in frustration, pushing me away onto the passenger seat. I knew he was completely angry and I bit my lower lip because I never intended to come across as a tease but . . . _

_Who said it was over? Just when I thought he was done he was straddling me, towering over me having jumped over to the passenger seat with ease. I tried to hold his gaze as it darkened. _

_He pulled the seat completely down so we were leaning back, I grew nervous because he didn't like people to tell him 'no'. _

"_Ed- . . ." I kept my hands on my chest so there was a barrier between us but his ego was bruised was in control._

_One of his hands took both of mine and pulled them above my head as his body pressed tightly onto mine, while the other one . . . was he undoing his pants? _

"_Edward," I said calmly trying to bring him back to sanity. _

"_You finish what you started!" he snarled, his mouth falling roughly to mine. _

_He confirmed my thoughts; he definitely thought I was behaving like a tease. _

_By this point, I realized he was in his boxers pressing through to my center and not in his pants anymore. I struggled to get my arms free and once I did I pushed him back by his shoulders. _

"_Stop this Edward!" I said. _

"_I want you now," he snapped in my ear pulling back in. _

_My whole body was pressed down by his making it impossible to move, so instead I tried to talk him out of it. _

"_You're doing it again," I spoke calmly. He growled. _

"_And it's not working," I continued. His lips only attacked my neck furiously. _

"_And before it's too late, let me go," I said. He sighed frustrated and rolled over to his own seat. _

"_I'm not happy about it Bella," he let me know trying to gather himself back together, we were both breathing heavily when he moved away. _

_I took his hand so he would look at me, when he did I smiled. _

"_This is a big step you've never let given me a choice before," I chuckled at the irony of it; he had a problem with getting his way all the time. _

"_You're coming back to me then?" he asked surprised, I shook my head no and he sighed. _

"_I don't want to play games Isabella," he said emphasizing my name which didn't make me feel comfortable at all. _

"_I'm not trying to prove a point," actually I was but he didn't need to know that. _

_He didn't say much after that and to my surprise, and I bet to his as well at his level self control, he took my home that night. He held my hand the whole drive and let me know I was his girl and he would get me back. _

"_I'll see you tomorrow?" he asked. _

_I rolled my eyes. "Don't push your luck."_

_He smirked at me. _

"_Luck pushed me first," he winked. I just rolled my eyes; he was totally using Pushing Daisies quotes, he hated to watch the show and only did when he was around me, which was all the time so it was doomed to happen. _

"_Don't mock me!" I warned and then opened my door, but his hand stopped me for a minute pulling me back down to him. _

"_C'me here," and he captured my lips in the most intense and slowest kiss we ever shared. It was filled with angst he felt in trying to do a perfect job in letting me go, it was filled with every bit of passion he felt for me and it almost made me changed my mind - damn was he dazzling me with his kiss? Was that even possible? I pulled apart for my own good with a loud groan. _

_I felt his smirk through my lips. _

"_Stop it!" and with that I left. He turned on the engine once he was sure I was in the house and waving at him. It wouldn't be long enough till I'd be in his arms, I knew that, and for an instant that thought scared me, yet at the same time completed me. _

*******************

Here you go guys! So how much did you hate it?

I hope you have an awesome Christmas!! :) best wishes from me!

A special thank you to margaritama (margarita) *hugs* she was sooooooooo nice to beta this chapter :) thank you very much I appreciate it a lot :D


	11. Ice creams and Coffee

I heard my phone buzz on the side of the bed, i jumped on it and check the caller ID; Edward.

Figures!

"Space Edward! Space!" I answered dismissing the 'hellos' and not giving him a chance to speak.

"That's what im trying to do!" he sighed over the phone.

"You're not doing a great job at it" I sing song perfectly aware that would get to him.

He sighed frustrated, he was probably running a hand through his messy bronze hair, I could read him so well.

"I was wondering if I could come over?" I could tell he was making a lot of effort to sound nice and not demanding.

I thought about it, and I don't think Edward's presence will sooth well to Charlie he was already having a hard time trying to be okay with the fact that I still loved Edward after everything.

"No, I don't think its such a great idea" I mumbled with a sigh even if I really wanted to see him that bad I knew I just couldn't do that to Charlie right now, it will be like a dagger to his heart.

"No? why not?" he did the best in him not to sound irritated or angry but I noticed his measured tone far too well.

"Charlie's here" he chuckled.

"I should probably do something about that" he mumbled, involuntarily my eyebrows furrow together, was he serious?

"Are you serious?" I almost laughed.

"Shut up!" he growled.

I could already picture Edward buying a car to make it up to Charlie, it was his way to say sorry to people. He didn't know how to apologize! Ever! So he thought the best way was to give away expensive presents, which brought a new fight most of the time.

"So how about ice cream?" he offered a defeated sigh broke his lips.

I thought about it, I was trying to make this guy suffer! What was up with that?

"Edward, we hang out last night" I tried to reason with him but he was not too pleased with my clever remark so he cut me off even before I finished my sentence.

"AND SO WHAT-?" I stood quiet hearing how he lost control of his patience.

Finally he let out a frustrated sigh one more time, realizing it might not be the best move for him to lose it. If he wanted me back how he claimed he did then he was going to have to make it up for me.

"I just wanted to see you" he admitted in his tender tone of voice that made my heart melt.

"I'll meet you there" I promised with a smile printing on my face.

"I can just pick you up" he cut me off.

"I can drive myself" I said firmly hoping he would let it go. He didn't do such a thing.

"Why???"

"Edward, let it go" I sighed.

"Are you coming with me?"

"NO!"

"Why not?" he demanded.

"I'll see you there Edward" I sighed frustrated hanging up.

It will take him awhile to get there, I knew this. He always liked to be in control, to everything go his way, and I liked to prove him wrong from time to time.

I took a long shower and after that I took my blue jeans that I felt extremely comfortable in, that I was not aware to use since I dated Edward Cullen, put a soft pink blouse on and took my keys.

Charlie saw me going out and just grunted at me from the couch, sighing I made my way over to him, things didn't ended so good last night and I didn't want him to think I did this because I was daring him, or because it was a temporary teenage whim.

I wrapped him with my arms from behind, kissing his cheek, he was not happy with me at all. All I got in response was "mmhhmm" and a grunt. I rolled my eyes at him and speed down to the door.

The cafeteria was already packed up when I got there but there was no sign of Edward anywhere, I thought I was running late after all my old pick up truck wouldn't run after 60 an hour.

I took a seat in the far booth we always hang out to, and order my cheery ice cream with royal cream and just regular black coffee for Edward he was not a fan of ice creams and this early in the morning the only thing he needed was coffee.

I saw him make his way in and I didn't have to wave to him to let him know where I was he was already standing above me with a grin on his face but his eyes were covered with his black Ray Bans, he leaned in for a kiss but will just have to settle for my cheek as I sternly looked at him.

"Behave" I hissed at him, I felt his lips grinning against my cheek. The close proximity of him made my legs shake, I could smell his after shave and his cologne, or even felt drop of water falling from his wet hair. Everything about him dazzled me and he was not even looking at me yet.

Instead of sitting next to me like he usually did he sat across from me that smug grin still persistent on his face.

"You weren't complaining last night"

"Very nice" I glared at him teasingly.

He laughed, as the waiter put down our orders, I gratefully smiled at him and he responded, my eyes met Edward then, I could still not see his eyes but I could tell he had that annoyed look on his face, before I could say anything or even gave him a strange looked he turned his face around as the waiter gave us a good day and left.

"What?" I snapped trying to bring his face back to me.

"Nothing" he mumbled not starring at me.

"Its not nice to keep a lady waiting you know?" I avoided an argument. }

"I bet you had nice company" he smiled wide.

I laughed at him, holding my spoon on my mouth.

"I cant believe you will freak out over a smile!"

"Im not doing such a thing"

"God-damn! You would have had a heart attack if you had heard him asking me out on a date a few minutes ago!" I teased not meeting his eyes that were suddenly everywhere on me, with a tight line on his lips.

"That's funny" he fake smiled at me playing with his car keys on his hands.

His gaze was lost on the table as he refused to meet me yet again.

"What's up?" my tone of voice was serious by now dismissing every hint of sarcasm.

"Carlisle left the house" he explained both of his arms crossed over the table as he leaned forward, my eyes were overwhelmed with sadness immediately, fearing for him.

"What happen?" I asked my voice shaking a little and my lips trembling.

"I guess he had enough" he shrugged his shoulders and once again shield his face away from me.

"Edward" I tried to take his hand.

"What? Just one more to leave me" I shook my head as my eyes parted away from his breaking ones, I couldn't believe he was turning the tables around on me.

"Don't do that" I took my hand away.

"What?" he snapped.

"Don't do that!" I snapped back irritated looking down at my cup "Manipulating me like that" I grunted at him.

"Im not doing such a thing" he called even though he kept starring down out the window.

"Its not fair!" I had the sudden urge to hit him very hard right now.

"Forget I said anything" he mumbled and once I again I grunted at him very irritated at his comment.

"I hate it when you do that Edward!"

"Ok ok! Forget it! Let it go!" he raised his voice trying to take my hands in his "Im sorry!" he sincerely admitted. I took his hands in my own and kissed them lightly.

"Do you see why I cant be with you?" he stared at me for the longest time ever, and I felt his eyes pierce through me.

"Is that what you really think of me?" it was a tiny whisper but loud enough for me to hear.

"Oh hey guys!" I didn't cared to turn around and neither did he as we kept starring at each other his sun glasses finally off.

"Are you guys back together yet?" I recognized that cheerful voice of Jessica, that's what brought me back to present taking my hands down to my lap. I frowned a little at the 'yet' but Edward kept a grin on his face staring at me almost laughing at my discomfort, surprisingly he didn't respond with a clever remark, he just waited my response.

"No, we're not..-" I shook my head fervently at them, Mike nodded but Jessica was far from getting the point.

"Oh..but do you like-" Mike cut her off sensing the uncomfortable tension in the air.

"We should probably go. Bye guys" I waved them off, relief they were done and didn't say anything more inappropriate.

That's when I caught Edward's appreciative look down to Jessica's ass, my anger boiled inside of me, the nerve of him. He didn't seem to acknowledge the fact I noticed though.

"Jess is a nice girl" I called to him he nodded at me uninterested.

She was more prominent then me that's for sure, and cutest, and tanned…whatever.

"You seemed to notice" I accused.

And he just laughed at me! Shaking his head lightly. I glared at him wondering at what he was up to.

"Im far away of trying to get to Jessica's pants to get you jealous Bella"

"Im not-"

"Yeah, try again!" he snapped a little to harsh then he meant I believe "I don't do that" once again I was private of his eyes.

I bit my lower lip nervous as hell. He never cheated on me before, not even now that I was not tied to him.

"I'll get you back on my own Bella" he promised, this time his eyes showed me the whole emotions dripping from him, and I could tell he was serious and that he wouldn't stop at nothing.

After that the tension became too much to bear, finally I finished my ice cream and stood up.

"I should get going" he nodded and put some cash on the table getting up himself.

Then I saw how his eyes traveled my body up and down and he frowned all the sudden.

"What?" I snapped, I knew he had something to say to me.

"Are we back to that?" apparently my out fit didn't suit him.

I rolled my eyes at him and walked out of the coffee house, feeling him close behind me, he took large steps in front of me to open the car door for me while I searched for my keys in my purse I gave him a small smile when I climbed the truck he didn't wait for his chance he leaned over the door hoping to catch my lips in his but I was faster quickly I took his face in my hands and gave put a kiss on his forehead, he sighed but as soon as my hands left his face he leaned in stealing a peck from my lips, involuntarily I blushed, which was stupid after everything we've been through.

He gave me a smirk and walked himself back to his own car. I didn't wait to see him speed off, I decided against it and brought my ass back home like a nice girl, controlling my instincts in jumping him and make my way with him, I'd like to think I was stronger then that.

He had something different in him, I could tell. It felt like he was resigned in following my rules, and I didn't know if that scared me or If he was just losing this fight.

His words hit me like a thousand breaks.

"_Ill get you back on my own"_

He didn't feel the need to make me jealous with another girl, he felt I would jump back into his arms willingly and at whatever he did.

Cocky bastard.

I pulled up to my driveway and sighed when I caught a glance of Jacob Black sitting in my porch, stupid me forgot to call him!

Why did I always hurt everyone around me?

Edward was not with me anymore to take the blame. This was just me being a lousy friend.

"Im sorry!" immediately I said jumping out of the truck while stalking my way towards him.

He shook his head with a laugh, I could see the sarcasm dripping in him.

"Im so sorry!" I pleaded with him, trying to gain his eyes on me.

"You owe me big time!" I nodded.

"I just got caught up-"

"Ok, whatever Bells-" I smiled at his nickname. I knew he couldn't stay mad at me for too long "Geez I just cant believe you will put yourself through that again!" weakly I smiled.

"Bella you deserve better!" he tried to reason with me, my eyes parted away from him, I didn't want to hear this.

"You deserve me!" I laughed at his cocky attitude; he smirked with a cocky grin on his face.

"Alright Jake, I'll keep that in mind" I flirted back.

"You should! I'll be nice enough and forgive you" I rolled my eyes at him, he laughed.

"I'll even let you spend a whole afternoon with me" I gasped in fake enjoyment.

"Oh my god! What did I do to deserve such an honor?"

"Im a forgiving person!"

"I should let you down more often" I grinned at him and I could swear he blushed.

"Nobody said it was going to be pretty" he gave me his widest grin and I rolled my eyes once again, the nerve of him! He was even cockier than Edward!

"You don't know how much sorry I am right now" I stopped my fake sarcasm, and he let out a big laugh.

"Well like it or not you'll have fun!" he winked at me and he stood up ready to leave.

"You're leaving?"

"Care to join me?" he moved his eyebrows suggestively and I blushed. I cant believe this! Why?

"Im gonna have to pass up"

"You wont be that lucky next time" he promised while he sang the words to me, I frowned.

"Ok this is getting scary" he laughed and I walked him back to the truck promising him I'll make it up for him and watch him fix a car when I had the chance.

It wouldn't do me any good. Specially cause I didn't know what I was getting myself into and I was dealing with strange feelings when I was around Jake, and I didn't want them. I shouldn't want them.

******************

Thank you once again for the amazing replies guys :) my holidays were ok thanks! Love you all.

Ok ok don't be afraid, im not trying to put a Jacob/Bella whatsoever! Im just trying to have her deal with her thoughts like we saw on ECLIPSE, I hated her back then so hopefully you'll resent her just a little or not because Eddy was a little jerk with her all the time so this is different.

And I'll try to put more boring sweet Edward for you don't worry! xD Just for the moment then we'll see. xD

Ok ok any thoughts?? :)


	12. Im cheating

Surprisingly Edward managed to be in his best behavior when it came to spending time together, he wasn't bossing me around or stalking me 24/7 which was always a plus since i started hanging out with Jake a lot lately, not one thing in particularly that i wanted him to know about. Or that he needed to for that matter.

I tried to tell myself this way was the best way, nobody got hurt, and I could hang out with two of my favorite persons in the world. My best friend and my lover.

And I couldn't figure out who was each one.

What? I didn't just say that. I wouldn't.

Jacob.

It was try to describe what was going on with him, mainly because most of the time we spend together he kept flirting at me, and I kept flirting back which didn't help to solve my problem. I couldn't figure out If I was just following a game or if I wanted something in exchange.

But once again if I wasn't flirting to gain something why did I felt like I had to hide so badly to Edward what I did most afternoons? I used to tell him I'd hang out with Jessica and Angela for the most part he bought it not that he was extremely happy about it either, he knew hanging out with Jessica consisted in meeting new people, or hanging out with a drooling puppy as was Mike Newton.

But whenever we got into the whole Jacob discussion he will froze and not let me utter one word. That was back when we were together of course. Now I just hide Jacob from him.

And part of me thought Edward's treatment towards Jacob subject was the fact he knew something was going on with him, and he definitely was sure it wasn't one sided.

So that was his biggest fear.

I needed to get my priorities straight and soon.

I stopped brushing my hair when I felt my phone going off, I read the caller ID and was not surprised.

"Still hangover from last night?" I asked with a smirk.

"HAHA" sarcastically he spat, I laughed and I heard his groan "Not so loud" he whined.

"That's what you get for trying to drunk/seduce me with sexual hints" I really wished I didn't cross that line. It was too late to take my words now. Once he goes off there was no way to stop him.

"OH…please! You were the one jumping on me sticking your tongue down my throat" I gasped at his remark.

"You're so full of it Cullen!"

"You totally took advantage of me" he pretended to be mad.

"Yeah and you took my under wear with you! And I wanted it back!" I could totally feel that smirk.

Now I really wanted to play hard to get but I was intoxicated so was he, and we were good.

_He pulled me against the bathroom door almost knocking himself out to the floor, he was totally drowned in booze, whenever we were together he didn't enjoy himself like this, instead he stayed put and sober so he could always keep an eye on me, eventually he lost it and started drinking and soon I was following right after him. _

_He managed to lift me up with one arm strongly wrapped around my waist while the other hand was busy with a drink, I laughed and even if I wasn't half as drunk as he I followed him suit, he pulled us to the dark bathroom making a mess out of everything trying to find the light switch, soon enough he did and with a smirk planted on his face that im pretty sure he was born with it lifted me up to the sink, ravishing my mouth and there was nothing sweet about it. _

_His moves were fast and firm, his tongue battling with my own, exploring my mouth like he didn't in awhile, he didn't even asked for permission when his tongue controlled every inch of it, it was too fast. He was impatient I could tell. _

_His hands parted my legs with their pressure on my tights, I betrayed myself when from my lips a moan was heard giving him only permission to continue, even if I knew this wasn't gonna end the way he'd like to. _

"_God-damn" he was getting frustrated that we still had so many clothes on. I laughed at his eagerness, and stopped his hand from zipping his trousers, he brushed it off though continuing his movements this time under my skirt though. _

_I arched my back at the new found touch, of his hand working down on me, his touch always used to make me shiver and grow instantly hot, but I was keeping it under control, or was i? _

_I grasped his hair with a fist on my hand giving his mouth permission to work on my neck. _

_I groaned once again when his hand made contact with my wetness which couldn't have made him happier. _

"_Are you happy to see me I see" he cleverly remarked with a smirk. _

_His hand came down to my bottom and firmly grasped it pulling me roughly by his own pelvis, I groaned. _

"_Not more then you I see" my turn to smirk while I watched his face in amusement, he laughed and charged at whole speed his lips on mine, this kiss was not tender or sweet or something to write home about, it was a pure bliss of sexual frustration. _

_I pulled him closer by his hair and didn't realize his hands were tugging down bringing something with them, so when I felt a sudden cold I jumped. _

_That was my cue to stop him. It was my fault for letting it go that far after all. _

"_Oh NO, no, no" I pushed at his chest, he glared at me pulling back a little. _

"_No way this is happening" I shook my head at him and I did caught his eyes glint with two things; confusion and rage. _

"_Stop teasing me Bella!" he growled back at me not letting me enough room to breathe. _

"_Im not!?" I offered. _

_He laughed at me and put his panties on his pocket, dumbfounded I looked at him weird. _

"_I'll keep this as I reminder im still getting you wet whenever I wish" he smirked, even if I tried to snatch them away he was too big and hovering over me like the Eiffel tower so I had no chance. _

"You want them back? Well then come and get them" he challenged, I rolled my eyes he was so desperate.

"Keep them as a reminder you're only having fun with that" I snapped, and he scoffed.

"Oh c'mon you cant handle one visit? You know how dangerous you'd get uh?"

"Please…if only dangerous you mean trying to get your sister killed for dripping every drop of that water bottle on me! Which I definitely didn't found funny at all"

I heard his chuckle.

"Yes I bet you didn't love the attention you were getting from Tyler watching your-" I cut him off instantly.

"DON'T YOU EVEN FINISH THAT SENTENCE!" I blushed madly, I was wearing white after all.

"So you're coming or not?" he let out in a quick mumble it came out with a little bit or resentment and harshness in his voice and he didn't do a great job at covering that.

"Edwar-"

"We can pick up where we left off last night" he hinted. I sighed loud for him to hear.

"I'll see you around Edward" I tried to finish the conversation but he was faster than me.

"Please! Wait! We're going out to the movies tonight all of us, come"

"Are you asking me or are you telling me?"

"Im telling you" he scoffed, I rolled my eyes he'll never change.

"Goodbye Edward"

"Wait! C'mon it will be fun, its not another party just us going to a movie, that's it!" I gave it a lot of thought and I didn't know if it was such a great idea.

"Who is coming?"

"You know the usual, Emmet, Rose, Alice, and Jazz-" I cut him off.

"And me and you!" I sighed "Like a triple date or something"

"We can just go as friends" I heard his own irritated sigh.

"Oh really?" I laughed, that didn't go so well last night, I wanted him to work hard and all he had to do was give me a few pick-up lines and then id be jumping back into his welcoming arms, right then I realized I wasn't frustrated at Edward I was frustrated at myself and the lack of control I had whenever I was around him.

"I mean if you can control yourself"

Damn! I hated it when he read my mind.

"I'll see you around" I said finally giving a defeated sigh he knew what that meant.

"Sweet! I'll be there at 7!" and that was the last thing I heard from him.

I tried to focus on my homework while I could, staying in my room and trying to avoid another fight with Charlie, I hadn't probably said sorry for what had happen but I didn't intend to do so either, he never gave Edward the chance or the time of the day, he never tried for starter so I wasn't going to say sorry that easily yet.

Suddenly I heard a knock on the door and as soon as I lifted my head up it was already open but it wasn't Charlie, it was none other then Jacob Black. I furrowed my eyebrows together in confusion, well…Charlie ever let Edward come in the room, he'd say it was inappropriate but of course he didn't mind letting Jacob in.

"Hey" I gave him a big smile which he took enveloping me in a bear hug, wow he had gone so big lately! And he was a few years younger than me.

"Hey you! Just thought I'd stop by" I nodded.

"What's up? What are you doing?"

"Homework" I let out an annoyed sigh.

"Oh cool, I can help you"

I accepted his offer and I for once I was glad, because I really needed the company and because it was nice for once to do something productive and laugh at the same time, and I managed to laugh a lot when I was around Jacob.

"So what are you doing tonight?"he asked I flinched a little and I was glad he was talking again before I could utter one word out "Cause the guys want to go to the beach tonight, thought It'd be fun" he shrugged his shoulders.

"As much fun that sounds I was thinking in finishing up here"

What the hell? What was I doing? Why could I bring myself to say the truth for once?

"Oh that's cool I'll help you"

Damn! Do something!

"Oh no that's fine! Actually me and Charlie we're gonna hang out, he says we've been missing father/daughter time together, so" I gave him an apologetic smile.

I was such a bitch! I don't know what came over me anymore! I was not only lying to Edward but now Jake too.

Great!

"Oh no that's totally fine, besides I wouldn't want to miss the beach, they say a lot of waves are gonna be up so!"

He started to get up and I knew that was cue to do also following right behind him.

"Then I'll see you…" he wanted me to finish that sentence for him, I rolled my eyes at his persistent mood.

"Tomorrow?" I offered.

"Oh yes, I have a bike to work on, and maybe I can give you a ride on it once we're done"

Wow! That sounded nice!

"That sounds great Jake!" I squealed. He laughed at my eagerness.

"Then I'll see you tomorrow" he smiled turning the engine on.

"Count on it"

Now I was really excited, not only did I get to see Edward tonight like in a few minutes but I also got the chance to ride a bike! Not that he said he let me but hey he wouldn't ever say no to me.

*******

Im trying to update this as soon as possible cause I want to start working on my other story and besides I left you with no updates for way to long! :D so expect more updates to come soon.

**Thanks once again for the support, and I know right now this sounds boring but it will get interesting soon. :D **


	13. Movie Night

At 7:15 Edward was at my door, instead of honking on his claxon he actually stepped out of his car and knocked on the door like a normal human being or real boyfriend would do.

He gave me his widest grin at my shocked face, and leaned in closer; close enough for me to breathe in his scent, damn him! Immediately, I turned my head so his lips landed on my cheek, I blushed and could feel his smirk against my skin.

"You really need to stop doing that! I broke up with you remember?" I taunted.

He rolled his eyes at me and tugged at my tank top pulling me closer to him.

"C'me here," he breathed huskily.

His hand still gripped my shirt, keeping the gap close between us his whole weight hovering above me like he was some Greek God.. My legs felt weak and I could feel myself almost falling.

Feeling that kiss coming, I snapped out if as his nose brushed mine.

I was a little angry, actually. Angry, at myself for letting this go so far, and at him for not keeping his promise.

"Are we going or what?" I snapped a little harsher then I intended, walking past him to the car when his voice stopped me.

"Bella! What . . .?" his voice was confused and I got even angrier, he couldn't do this to me.

"Friends remember?" I yelled opening the passenger door and climbing in, slamming it shut after me. He climbed in beside me wanting some answers.

"What was that?"

"Are we still pretending like nothing ever happened, and you didn't treat me like shit for the past 2 years or what?" his eyebrows immediately rose together, his expression becoming worried, confused and annoyed.

"Bella I thought we were working on . . ." but I cut him off before he could finish.

"OH . . . that's how you work through things? Stalking people and invading their personal space?" I barked, glaring at him, thinking if going out with him right now will do any good.

"You sure didn't complain . . ." he replied heatedly.

"Stop that Edward!" I raised my voice, my hands violently shaking.

"What do you want me to say?" he yelled each word, staring at me.

"I want you to apologize and mean it for once!"

He sighed, ending the staring contest.

"We should get going," and with a last sigh he turn the engine on.

At that point, I decided it was best to stay at home for the night, especially after how things just ended.

"Maybe I should just . . ."

But the car was already moving and with a final roar I remained quiet, waiting for him to say something or do anything but he never did. He seemed to be lost in thought just like me. I pulled my hair to use it as a curtain so I didn't have to deal with his eyes looking at me and so I wouldn't catch a glance of him either. It would probably scare me.

Once we arrived, he parked the car and I opened the door ready to climb out but he didn't move, he just sat there gazing out the window.

"Are you coming or not?" I sighed, a little saddened at how the night had begun. Why was I being such a bitch?

"I don't want it to be like this," he said tightly.

"Lets just forget about it and have fun . . ." but he cut me off, once again surprising me.

"I'm sorry," he blurted out, for the first time being completely honest. I knew him well enough to notice this.

I grew exasperated when he didn't turn once to me, so I took his face in my hands and made him face me. I flinched a little when I noticed his eyes were in pain. I bit my lower lip gazing at him.

"We really should go see that movie." I smiled letting him know I accepted his apology and all was okay.

He nodded and climbed out. A second later he was at my side, not holding hands, not wrapping an arm around my shoulders, not pulling me closer by my waist or my ass, but actually he put his hands deep down his pockets and walked right beside me.

Surprisingly, he didn't sit beside me and I didn't know if I was grateful or saddened about it. The latter won. I wanted my distance right? He was giving it to me.

Stop complaining then!

I looked over to my side just in time to see a tall blonde with high heels and mini skirt make her way over the seat beside Edward. Intently I watched the scene before my eyes clearly hearing that pitch high tone when she asked, "Is this seat taken?"

"I cringed a little. Oh no! That was not happening any time soon!

I stood up and quickly passed over Alice and Jasper, making my way to Edward when I saw him shrug his shoulders.

"Yes it is," I snapped giving her a nasty glare, she rolled her eyes and turned around, her hair flipping back. Edward kept a finger on his temple while he smirked at me, I glared at him and pointed at him.

"Shut up!" I warned him. He let out a laugh and put his hands in the air promising he wouldn't tease me as I sat down and punched him right on the shoulder.

********

"I'm not having nachos ever again!" Emmett whined, complaining about a broken tooth.

"Like last time?" Rose taunted, and he grinned at her.

"Having nachos from your mouth is another deal babe," eliciting a concerts of 'ews' from the crowd while Emmett kept his steady grin on his face.

"Whatever! Bella are you coming home with us?" Emmett wiggled his eyebrows at me. I rolled my eyes at him and of course I noticed the grin Edward sent his way.

"I don't think so," I said, rolling my eyes slightly annoyed.

"Not tonight," Edward confirmed.

"Oh c'mon Bella! Was he that bad?" Emmett pushed.

"He was bad," I confirmed, nodding my head I could feel Edward's stare. But he was not frowning, he was simply staring at me with a small smile. Maybe ashamed or maybe sorry, I couldn't tell.

"Does that include bedroom time too?" Jasper teased, making everybody laugh. I remained quiet and surprised myself when I didn't blush. Clearly they were waiting for an answer and I decided to tease him, his hot intense stare on me the entire time.

"Ehh . . . you know," I shrugged my shoulders like there was nothing worth to remember which was clearly a hard punch to his ego. His eyes widened and I could feel his body tense, ready to go ballistic as everybody laughed.

"OH SNAP!" Emmett shouted out loud.

"Wait a minute!" Edward tried to talk over the loud noise; finally I let my laugh get the best of me dropping the dead serious stance.

"Nothing to write home about," I continued.

"That's it!" he finally snapped and didn't even give me time to run when he was tossing me around his shoulder.

"I'll give you a reminder if you guys don't mind," he shouted with a smirk on his face.

"No, no, no let go of me!" hysterically I laughed, finally being able to stand on my own. However, when I did I didn't plan on being this close to him with only a small space between us. My chest was still heaving from laughter when suddenly everybody kept walking leaving us behind.

I smiled at him while biting my lower lip.

"So I'm not worth remembering?" he asked towering over me.

"Hey! Life is full of disappointments don't worry," I patted his shoulder trying to move away, but when I moved left he blocked me leaving me no way out. I grinned.

"I bet blondie wouldn't agree with you," he smirked at me, I glared at him.

"You said you wouldn't . . ." but he cut me off.

"HEY! You said I was bad in bed! Everybody lies!" he taunted, I stared at him mouth dropped open.

Unbelievable!

"Fine!" I scoffed walking past him to the car, he grinned back at me.

The ride back was pretty much silent; after we got home he parked the car and turned around to face me.

"You still don't wanna take that back, love?" he grinned.

"You're such an ass!" I mumbled under my breath thinking this would be the perfect time to go inside.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he grinned.

"In your dreams," I snapped opening the car door ready to get out of here.

"I know I'm in yours," he replied, I stopped to glare at him one last time.

"What? You do talk in your sleep Bella it's not my fault!" he defended himself. Was he for real? I blushed madly.

"Completely . . . I mean."

"UGGHH," I slammed the door behind me, completely furious.

"Good night honey," he sing-songed at me, opening his window showing me a clear view of his cocky ass face.

My response was slamming the door from my house. He was such an ass. But I had fun. Edward would never change and at this point I didn't know if I wanted him to.

Suddenly I felt my phone buzz in my pants I picked it up and read those three words that would make any girl melt.

"I love you"

And I love you too, I said to myself with a wide smile on my face I went to sleep that night, knowing rather well where my heart stood and that was a fight I wouldn't be losing any time soon.

********

**Author's Note (IMPORTANT):** ok guys I just want to let you guys know this is NOT a JACOB/BELLA story! Im just trying to tease Edward! Don't hate me too much though, im still not over j/b just yet, but next chapter I'll be done I promise.

Thank you so much for all those replies guys *hugs* they make me happy. :D

A special **thank you** to my beta **margaritama**:D shes awesome! I owe you big time! Thanks again!

I hope you all have a great new year! :D


	14. Lies and liars

**Author's Note:** here we go again! Hopefully with this chapter you **wont** hate me _too_ much.

I really want to bow down to my beta once again **margarita** thanks for doing this :D I really appreciate it a lot, I really love how you beta my work :D You are really **awesome**!

And of course I want to thank each one of you for being so patient with me, and for replying like per usual! You guys rock!

****

**Bella's POV:**

I woke up with the biggest grin in my face that morning as events from last night replayed in my dreams. I had the urge to text Edward back and tell him I was in the same boat as he, but I held myself from doing so.

I step into the shower and had a relaxing long bath. When I was finally done, I wrapped a towel around me to walk back to my room, nearly jumping out of my bones when I saw the person standing before me.

"What are you doing here?" shocked I didn't hear her come in.

"Well, Charlie let me in and besides I couldn't wait to tell you this," she chirped sitting on the bed looking at me like she had the biggest secret.

"What?"

"Oh, c'mon show some excitement!" she pleaded, clapping her hands together.

I rolled my eyes at her child-like eagerness at almost everything.

"C'mon Alice get to the point," I said grabbing panties and a pink bra from my dresser.

"Well guess who's in love?" she put her best dreamy eyes on. I laughed at her slipping on my underwear.

"Easter Bunny?" I offered but she chuckled at me.

"Whatever Bella!" she pouted. I laughed, not minding putting in a little bit of effort.

"C'mon!" she pushed. "You're dying to know!"

"I'm not," Actually I was scared to know the answer.

"Well, whatever you're no fun! I'll guess you'll have to find out for yourself," she said giving me best Alice smirk while getting up.

I nodded at her shaking my head at the quick visit; she was probably stopping by the neighborhood to pay a visit to Jasper.

Before she was out the door she stuck her head back in asking, " You're going to our Christmas dinner right?"

I groaned. I was so not looking forward to that.

"I think I'll stay with Charlie," I explained but she cut me off before I could continue.

"He said he'd be in Charleston?"

I widened my eyes in shock. "WHAT? CHARLESTON?" Now I was very confused. Judging from the way she shrugged her shoulders I could tell she was telling the truth.

"You know what? I'll have to get back at you." I stated.

She nodded once again.

"Ok, see ya'," and with that she was finally out leaving me to deal with my own thoughts.

I couldn't believe Charlie was abandoning me on Christmas! Ok, maybe we were not the best daughter/father role model but hell it was Christmas! Maybe I should just go to Phoenix, Renee will be there, unless she was off somewhere between Hawaii or Thailand. Really, who knew with her sometimes.

I sighed, this had happen before.

I ran down stairs glad to find Charlie watching the game with a bag of chips on his lap.

"Dad?" he snapped his head back to look at me.

"What is this about you going to Charleston?" I asked a little hurt.

He sighed and stood up.

"I guess you talked to Alice," he sighed running a hand through his hair.

"Are you for real?" I raised my voice a little.

He sighed.

"I'm so sorry Bella, we're working on this case, and I need to be there for a the few weeks before and after Christmas so I decided to just stay there instead of flying back and forth. . ." I huffed, how was I becoming the bad guy here!? I will not keep him away from his job.

"NO! No! Its okay," I reassured him giving him my best smile "Its just that it took me by surprise when Alice mentioned it and you didn't say anything."

"Oh, that's because I told her not to leave you alone on Christmas." I furrowed my eyebrows as I followed him to the kitchen.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well, I don't want you to be alone for the holidays, go out with your friends! Have fun! Just don't stay at home!" Ok, now I was even more confused.

"With the Cullens?" I said slowly. Charlie sighed and I bet he wanted me to let go of it, but I wouldn't.

"I . . . You know, if those are your friends and . . ."

I gave him a look.

"Fine! I've seen you do have fun with them . . . " he gave me a nod and I motioned for him to go on. "And he has . . . gotten good to . . . you?" he stumbled making me almost laugh.

"So, if you really have fun and everything is cool . . ." I ran up and hugged him not letting him finish. He was finally coming around and I made a quick note to remind Edward to make it up to Charlie if he really wanted to work things out with me. Charlie was still my dad and important to me.

"Edward is getting better," I reassured Charlie hoping it would ease his concerns.

He returned my hug, squeezing me tightly to him.

**********

I grabbed my yellow hoodie and headed out into the cold air. I did a pretty good job of not slipping on the wet pavement while I climbing into my truck, putting Edward's old CD I made my way down to La Push.

Maybe today was not the greatest day to ride a motorcycle, weather plus my clumsiness was not a good combination.

Those thought flew out of my mind when I saw Jake standing between one red bike and another blue motorcycle, both waiting to be put into action. I smirked climbing out and launched myself at him.

Where did that came from?

"Whoa go easy, they're barely stable," he tried to hold me back but I too excited and looking forward to riding one.

"Well, then get your ass out there and start them!" I demanded.

"Only if you'll assist me," he grinned widely at me.

I laughed at his poor attempts of flirting.

"You know I will," I winked going straight to the garage not giving him a second look but knowing full well he would follow me.

But, of course, being me, I made a mess out of everything. First, I scattered the tools all around the floor trying to find some kind of special key he needed, so when I let the oil fall I was pretty much ordered to stand aside and watch him work his magic.

"Oh! C'mon! Let me help, I really feel bad Jake!" I whined, feeling completely useless.

"I think you've done enough for today thank you," he chuckled, his eyes trained on the bikes.

I sighed, crossing my arms across my chest.

"I'm not happy about this," I spat. He rolled his eyes at me.

His next thing question took me completely off guard.

"So, how's Edward doing?" my mouth dropped open as I stared at him. He let out a laugh but I could tell it was filled with sadness which I could see in his eyes. "What? You think I didn't know that you were sneaking around?"

I frowned, I didn't like that word. I was not sneaking around, I was allowed to do what I wanted with my life and I didn't needed Jake sticking his nose in my business.

"Jake . . ." I started but he barely let me talk.

"I wouldn't hold it against you," this time he turned around to let me know he was being sincere, but he was also hurt, deeply hurt. "Maybe you should learn on your own that he's not good for you," and with that he turned back to work on the bikes.

I sighed, this was completely wrong in so many ways. Suddenly, I felt the need to go back to Edward, where I felt safe and not . . . awkward.

"I should go." I got up taking my car keys in my hands, he froze and stood up completely taken aback at my behavior.

"This is not a good idea," I said started walking back to my truck, only stopping when his arm brought me back to him. I stared up at him shocked, for a 15-year old he was _strong_.

"Don't leave," he pleaded, his eyes glowing with hope. "Im sorry I snapped at you," but I shook my head.

"This is not about that Jake!" I let out in a frustrated sigh, glancing everywhere but him not aware that his hands were still holding me.

"We should stop pretending this . . ." I motioned between me and him ". . . is going anywhere." I caught his defeated stare and to my surprise my own words hurt me just as much. I knew I felt something for Jake and was desperately trying to deal with those feelings.

"How would you know that if you just let yourself continued to be pressured by Cullen?" he snapped furiously.

"I'm not being pressured by him Jake, it's my choice . . ." I stated, he cut me off with a laugh.

"Please Bella! You barely have a choice when you're with him." I glared at him like he had grown a third head, was he for real?

"What the hell is your problem!?"

"If you give yourself the chance to be happy, _really happy_," he emphasized, "with somebody else you would see what's happening with him."

I listened intently.

"He treats you like his property, clearly not respecting your thoughts. He doesn't let you hang out with your friends, REAL friends, and he disrespects your home, YOUR FATHER!" he yelled. I shook my head not believing he was saying this to me.

"He's really trying!" I defended.

"BECAUSE HE WANTS YOU BACK!" he snapped tearing his hands off of me exasperated. "What happens after he wins Bella?" he asked. I really hoped he wasn't expecting an answer.

"What happens after he doesn't have to be nice anymore to get what he wants?" Jake continued.

I wanted so badly to say he was wrong, I wanted to yell at him and tell him how stupid he sounded and that Edward would never to that to me – again. That he even loved me but my mind was a cold, blank slate. I couldn't utter one word.

"What happens when you're pulled back in the dark by him and unable to get out?"

"Now you're sounding dramatic! It's not like were living in the twilight zone," I laughed but my humor was lost on Jake. He just stared down at the floor playing with his hands.

"I don't want you to go back with him," he said in a voice that was meant to be a whisper but he had such a passion in it, it came out a little louder to my ears. "I want you with me." he admitted. I bit my lip completely dazzled and not by Edward.

What was wrong with me?

"You know those bikes are not gonna work on their own," I smiled trying to ease the mood. I saw a small smile grace his lips but he didn't meet my stare; he was probably still ashamed by his desire.

********

"If you ever put me on a bike again I'm seriously hunting you down," I spat angrily at Jake while we made our way back up the hill. He kept laughing at me.

"Oh c'mon Bells! Hop on," he said in between laughs, I took my helmet off and threw it at him.

He groaned in pain but didn't stop from following my pace with the bike.

"I prefer to walk than ride on those devil mobiles!"

"Now what did the bike ever do to you?" he asked in faked concern.

I turn my gaze to him, full of anger, was he mocking me?

"Oh geez! It looked at me funny!" I spat sarcastically. "What can it be?" I screamed while I sat on his porch.

"Did you happen to fall on your ass again Bella?" he turn the bike off along with his helmet and came to sit down with me.

"Oh! Nice work Sherlock!"

"I don't think we should do this anymore," he said.

"YOU THINK?" But my anger only amused him even more; I was getting annoyed at the stupid sound of his laugher.

"Stop it," I snapped punching him repeatedly, he tried to move away from me but I was not stopping so he grabbed a hold my fists in his grip. I grinned because he was far stronger then I was, of course. But when I met his eyes they were dark and he got very silent. I bit my lip.

Where did the laughter go?

And then he leaned in crashing his lips down on mine, taking me completely off guard.

*********************

**Edward's POV: **

I could have killed Alice when she "forgot" to tell me Bella was going down to La Push. My anger boiled deep inside of me.

"_Edward! I didn't think it was a big deal or something to mention!"_ Alice defended herself with that high pitch tone of a voice that did nothing to my already growing need to kill somebody.

Hey! I had a victim or two in mind.

I could spend weeks without her. I could keep hitting on her just to try and get her to see me again. I could stand the thought of not seeing her like I used to. I could let her hang out with that horny teenager Mike Newton. But I was NOT allowing Jacob friggin' Black's presence anywhere near her. He was like a leech, a fucking parasite, that could not completely get the message that Bella was off limits.

So I snapped! Didn't give it a second thought and started my quest in finding Bella to bring her ass back here. I growled at myself, I was not thinking this through!

Was I willing to throw away every effort I made to try and stay civil, to try and make her really happy and comfortable with me?

None of that mattered when she was sticking her tongue down someone else's throat!

So when I saw his lips crashing down on hers, and when I saw she didn't make any move to stop him I died inside. Clearly they didn't notice me, and that was good.

Oh yes! I was going to have fun with this.

First, I'll bring Bella's ass in the car whether she liked it or not. Then I'll go back and give him the ass-kicking of his life, he wouldn't know what it hit him! Yep, that's what he'll get for touching someone else's girlfriend. Then I'll take her back home and make her mine, like I've been dying to do for the last two months!

That was what old Edward would do.

I was gonna make them pay, make her pay.

No! Wait! I was not doing going to do that, no way. Clearly, I didn't think this though, so I got the hell out of there as fast as I could. They hadn't even noticed I'd come and gone.

The proper thing to do would be to stay put patiently and wait for her to explain herself.

Screw that!

I was done being good.

I would never forget the ache I felt deep in my heart.

**Bella's POV:**

The instant Jacob's lips crashed on mine, my eyes widened in surprise. This was totally not what I expected.

I pushed him off lightly not wanting to hurt his feelings

But he grabbed the back of my head and tried one more time to press his lips down on mine. And for one brave instant, I almost kissed him back but I pulled back.

This was totally not what I expected.

He pulled back biting his lower lip staring down at me, I looked up at him.

"It was like kissing my sister," he cringed.

I laughed.

"Took you long enough though," I said wipping my mouth.

He rolled his eyes.

"Don't know what happened there," I asked but he laughed lightly, staring down at his hands.

"The moment was perfect," he mumbled.

I rolled my eyes and scoffed.

What did I do that made him think it was ok to kiss me? When I was punching him or when I was yelling at him?

"Shut up." he growled.

"I'm so glad that's out of the way."

"You get it now?" he grinned and I smiled back.

I now knew for certain that Edward was the one for me - always! I didn't ever want to be parted from him. And I would have to tell him the whole truth about Jacob and what happen today and the last couple of days. I was going to explain to him and he was going to have to be reasonable about it. Of course I knew that was asking a lot but he would do it.

I was so stupid for ever thinking I felt something for Jake other than friendship.

"You're my best friend," I bumped my shoulder into his.

That was it, nothing more nothing less, and I was so glad I finally understood what Jake meant to me. I was a little disgusted that a horrible kiss was what it took for me to realize that but I was glad I finally knew he was only my best friend.

Now, I just had to tell Edward that.

*******

So…?? xD

I just sent my beta the next chapter so when she's done the chapter will be up.


	15. New Year's Hell

**Author's Note:** first of all special thank you to **margaritama** for beta this chapter :D she makes everything I write prettier :D Thank you! *hugs*

Thanks to all of you for the awesome replies, they mean a lot. And im really sorry I took to long to put this up :( Don't hate me too much.

Edward's an ass Im sorry :(

*********

After my visit with Jacob, I drove straight home too tired and sore to do anything else. I noted a quick reminder to myself to get back at him for that. Surprisingly my phone hadn't gone off one single time today, not a single missed call or message from Edward.

I shrugged my shoulders; I had wanted space hadn't I?

Well I'd see him soon enough, I thought, as I'll be joining him and his family on their New Year's Eve. I heard they were planning on having a nice family dinner and then heading to _New Moon_, a famous club around town to ring in the New Year.

I had made up my mind about not going to the club, but Alice was insistent I attend. So, I promised her I'd be giving it a second thought even though my choice was already made.

But who knows? To be honest, I'd have a hard time saying 'no' if Edward asks me.

"Bella! I'm going now," Charlie called from down stairs, I jumped out of bed to go down and say goodbye.

It didn't take more then a minute. That was one thing I always liked about Charlie, he doesn't hover.

When his bags were packed in the trunk, he turned to me and stumbled on his words, as usual.

"So the only thing I'm asking here . . ." he sighed this was so hard for him, to set me free with the Cullens. ". . . is that you have fun tonight . . . don't stay out . . . be home around 2 in the morning?" he said to me. I shook my head at him letting him know he was not doing well. "What? 3?"

"Go and lock up some thief Chief Swan," I laughed, hugging him. He nodded and when he was about to enter the car he turned to me with a serious look. .

"Be careful!" he warned. I nodded my head like the good girl I was. "And . . . happy New Year."

"Happy New Year dad!"

Happy New Year indeed.

******

"What are you wearing?"

"Geezz . . . I'm telling you I don't know!"

"You know what that means right?" she giggled, while I rolled my eyes.

"Shopping!!" she squealed.

"Pass."

"Oh c'mon," she whined.

"No Alice, I think I have a great dress blue dress somewhere around here."

"Bella you're not wearing the dress from prom!" she snapped at me.

"It's not the prom dress!" I cried.

"Well . . . let me see it," she demanded, for being a tiny girl she really had some authority in her.

All the Cullen's did.

I opened my dresser to reveal a long-sleeved, soft blue dress that ended just below my knee. I saw how Alice cringed.

"What? It's nice!" I protested.

"Yes, to go to church," she mumbled.

"I heard that!" I warned. I put the dress back in the closet. "Besides its not like I'm going out, its just a family dinner," I complained.

"You're totally going to _New Moon_ Bella! Or else I'll make Edward make you."

I scoffed at her and she glared back at me with her hands on her hips.

"Don't dare me," she menaced. I just rolled my eyes at her.

"He can't make me," I snapped.

She laughed, once again I looked at her dumbfounded.

"Right," she drawled. I heard the sarcasm in her voice but decided to shake it off, my mind was focusing on something else. I hadn't heard from Edward in awhile, and I was been wondering what was he up to. It was strange of him to let me be this free for so long, I was missing him like crazy.

"How is he anyway?" I tried to sound casual like I wasn't thinking about him as much as I've been doing the last couple of days.

She shrugged her shoulders and this concerned me, she frowned a little which I caught.

"He's been pacing a lot," she mumbled.

Pacing? Edward? He definitely did that when he was mad and was trying to keep his anger under check.

_He had been pacing around a lot for the last hour, scratching his bare chest in frustration, tugging at his jeans lookingfor his keys for the hundredth time. I almost felt like asking "is it there?" but I wouldn't be able to hold back my laughter. If I were to mock him he would be even more upset and I didn't wanted that. _

_I tugged the sheet around me and stood up; I didn't wanted to be his punching bag just because he couldn't find his damn car keys. _

"_Shit," he uttered more obscene words under his breath and when he saw me getting up he glared at me and pushed me back onto the bed. _

"_Not going anywhere." _

_I sighed. _

"_I wasn't going anywhere," I lied. "I was only getting dressed," I explained, yet I knew I sounded far from convincing. _

_He lifted his head from looking under the bed to gaze at me . _

"_Then do it here." _

_I rolled my eyes at him, he was so retarded sometimes. _

_He kept going on his quest shoving books and clothes around, basically making a mess out of everything while in the mean time I pulled the sheet around me with a smirk on my face. I wanted to piss him off even more._

_I picked up my panties and lifted the sheet up my body to slid both legs over the cotton material. Apparently, this was enough to get under his skin because the next thing I knew he was cussing at me again. _

"_For Christ sakes!" he yelled, giving me an annoyed look he ripped the sheet off of me and threw it across the room, exposing my naked body. _

_What was his deal anyway? _

"_Asshole," I mumbled under my breath. _

_He kept looking for the keys, with rage rolling off of him in waves. It was priceless to actually witness this. I tried to pick up my jeans and shirt, but I didn't have a chance in hell trying to move through a room with an hysterical Edward. He just sighed in frustration at me and shoved me back onto the bed. _

"_Get out of the way Bella! God-damnit!" _

_I just gave up after awhile, so I sat legs crossed watching some TV. I didn't even try to help him because I knew it would set him off even more. _

"_This is unbelievable!" he yelled at himself once again, I turned my gaze from the TV to watch him._

"_Where did you last put them?" I said trying to help, he looked at in shock as if I'd I grown a third head. _

"_Jesus Bella! You know what? They're in the car! But I just like going around the house so much like an idiot searching for them," he snapped glaring at me. He was so dramatic sometimes. I just rolled my eyes at him stopping the laughter that threatened to escape my lips. _

_He started pacing around again, scratching his head. _

"_I'm gonna get some water," I sighed grabbing his sweats and putting them along with my discarded shirt on the floor. Surprisingly he didn't stop me, he just gave me a stern look as I walked out of the door. _

_Suddenly, I had a great idea! _

_********_

_I dangled the keys from my hand as I stepped in the room with a clever smirk on my face. He stopped his search and just stared at me in genuine surprise for once. _

"_Where were they?" he asked taking them from me. _

_I grinned widely. _

"_The car." _

It was an old habit of his, and I knew enough to remain quiet and just watch in amusement when he was like that. However, I couldn't bring think what could possibly have upset him this time?

"He's been a bitch lately," Alice groaned "Getting into fights with everyone." I furrowed my eyebrows in surprise and worry. _What the hell?_

"Is he okay?" this time I didn't hold back my concern and sat next to her on the bed to see if I could figure out what had gotten into him.

"I guess so, its just Edward, you know?" I nodded because no one knew better than me what that meant. "He doesn't say much," Alice said.

That I knew.

********

"I'm definitely not wearing that! EVER!" I snapped while she held a yellow strapless dress that didn't have enough material to even be deemed a dress.

"Try it on and stop being a bitch!" she screamed for the hundredth time since she walked in my room.

"Why do you hate me so much?" I cried.

"You, lady, are getting back with Edward tonight!" she stated with determination. I groaned. "Oh, yes Bella. Whether you like it or not, you are doing it because I'm sick and tired of have to listen to his whining every two seconds."

"And why is it okay for me to take that?" I grunted.

She gave me a look as if I was mentally challenged.

"Because you're the only one who can kick his ass! Duuh!"

Yeah right!

"You just don't know how to do it that's all," Alice continued.

"What do you mean?"

She gave me an eye roll.

"Bella, you always try to fight with Edward, bickering with at him. That shit doesn't work with him, what works is when you tease and seduce him, you know, make him beg!"

"No, that'll only make him even angrier!" I countered

She definitely didn't know her brother at all.

**********

I can definitely say that against my better judgment; I really looked good. Hot even.

The strapless yellow dress fit me well. It flared out a little loosely under my breasts and hugged all the right places on my hips. I slipped on my black high heels that I prayed wouldn't be the cause for a major fall during the evening.

I didn't bother overdoing it with my hair at all, instead I just let it loose around my shoulders. I didn't comb it so it looked messy, kinda like sex hair.

Before leaving, I made sure to call Jacob to wish him a happy New Year. He invited me to La Push to celebrate stay with them but I had already made plans, and I was looking forward to tonight so I thank him with a polite "no thanks" and hung up.

When I got to the Cullens, I took deep breath because I knew I was going to need it. But when I walked in and saw Edward sitting in the living room on a chair with a drink in hand I got worried. He didn't notice me, instead his gaze was occupied by his drink, his eyes seemed lost and almost red.

I touched his shoulder and he turned his attention to me. His lips were pulled into a tight smirk and eyes were roving up and down at my outfit. I grinned back at him but I couldn't help feeling that something was wrong.

He tugged at my hand lightly.

"Nice dress."

"Wanna say something about it?" I warned jokingly giving him a glare. What happen next took wiped the grin off of my face almost instantly. Edward abruptly let go of my hand and slipped his inside my dress grabbing me tightly.

"I'll prefer to _do_ something about it," he growled.

He still had the same grin but something about his actions and the tone in his voice filled me with a slight sense of dread.

His grip on me tightened and I jumped back a little pushing his hand away.

"Haven't you had enough of those?" I pointed to his drink, he shook his head.

"Not quite."

I tried to lighten in the mood with a little mindless flirting.

"Hey, if you were trying to pass out tonight I can think of a better way to do it," I joked.

"Aren't you such a slut?"

I jumped up at the harshness of the words, he mumbled very low but I heard it! And it surprised the hell out of me.

What has gotten into him?

"Excuse me?" I asked offended.

He had to be drunk! Of course!

He got up standing inches away from my face.

"Dinner's ready," I heard Esme call out. He was about to say something but that caught him off guard, instead he stepped back and put on a fake smile.

"Shall we?" he motioned for me to walk but I crossed my arms across my chest.

"What's with you?"

"I was just taking you up on your offer, you were the one throwing yourself at me!" he defended

I tilted my head watching in amazement at how he could be even more of a jerk.

"I wish I could say that I'm honored by it, but I know better than to feel special," he continued in a steady, ice cold and stern voice.

"Should I pretend to understand what that's supposed to mean?" I questioned, letting out a chuckle when he didn't respond. I knew he was drunk so I wasn't going to push the issue, instead I turned on my heel and walked back to the door to leave, but he didn't let me get that far. He pulled me by the arm and dragged me to his body wrapping an arm around my shoulders, dragging us back into to the dining room.

Some other time, his arm might make me feel safe and protected. Being so close to him and smelling his after shave and cologne would make my knees weak, but there was something about his firm hold and aggressive tone that was concerning.

Once he closed the door, I pulled apart from him immediately as he tried to glare a hole into my back.

I kept my gaze low and demeanor calm and went to sit as far away from his as possible between Emmett and Alice at the dining room table. He sat across from me with a fixed stare the entire meal. He knew how uncomfortable he was making me feel and I barely ate a thing. Meanwhile, Edward just kept drinking and pouring himself more liquor.

Everyone at the table decided to ignore the tension which was getting worse by the minute. Edward did nothing to ease the situation, he just kept his eyes trained on me throughout dinner.

He rude remarks about my abilities to 'work' with guys when Esme asked about my new job at the Newton's Restaurant didn't help the situation either. What was wrong with Edward?

And at point, I just asked him what the hell was wrong? But no one ever understood Edward, so they just ignored the problem. It was pointless.

Alice kept tugging at my hand trying to keep me civil and calm, and not let his attitude bother me. Despite how hard it was, I chose to ignore him and be the better person. Of course, this made everything worse.

He knew what I was doing and didn't like it. I watched in horror and confusion at the emotions swirling in his eyes switching from sad to angry in a matter of seconds.

"Hey Bella," he breathed over the conversation we were previously having. I continued to ignore him, laughing at something Emmett said.

"Hey Bella!" he shouted louder, gaining a few sighs from the table.

"I'm going to get the salad," Esme said getting up.

"Hey Bella! How's Jacob?" Edward yelled.

"Stop that already Edward," Emmett tried, but Edward shushed him away.

I gazed across the table at Edward confused, trying to see where he was going with this new outburst., At this point, I was shaking my head really at a loss in understanding his harsh treatment towards me.

The strange thing is that as confused as he looked asking that question, it also seemed like he really cared about my answer.

"Was he any good? " he asked, faking excitement. I just kept looking at him, completely disappointed at his behavior.

"Are we back to that?" I shook my head letting out an irritated sigh.

"Did you have a nice time?" he nodded like a crazy man, pretending to be interested and curious about it.

Once again I shook my head but this time I got up deciding not taking more of this bullshit and abuse. I also didn't want to be the cause of an awful New Year's Eve dinner so getting out of that situation sounded like a pretty good idea. I politely thanked Esme and started to say my goodbyes.

"You know what this has been nice but . . .?" at which point there were a couple of complains and grunts from the rest but I already made up my mind.

"C'mon Bella, please stay. Just don't pay any attention to him," Alice pleaded tugging at my arm and trying to make me sit back down. I shrugged her arms off a little too roughly and shook my head firmly.

"Yeah! He's drunk anyway," Emmett said trying to help.

I stood and firmly pushed my chair out of the way.

"Yes he is!" I confirmed his words. "Always has been," I nodded at Emmett not meeting Edward's gaze who was probably furious.

"And you're a lousy slut. That's a new development isn't it?" Edward slurred back angrily.

"Oookaaayyy," Rosalie finally spoke, shaken out of her daze.

I was surprised at the harshness of his words. I really didn't understand why he was acting this way. Everything was fine when I last saw him. I straightened out my shoulders, took a deep breath to say:

"Good night," and then I walked off, tears welling up in my eyes.

*******

**Edward's POV:**

"Nice one Edward," Alice snapped at me throwing her napkin across the table. But before Bella could even walk away or do anything else I was already on my feet and dragging me body to follow her out.

I wasn't nearly done with her yet.

"Edward!" Alice called out behind me but I ignored her. I heard the scraping of another chair and I didn't need to turn around to know it was Emmett, I kept walking. No one was going to stop me!

Once outside, I slammed the front door behind me making Bella jump and stop just as she almost reached her truck. When she saw me and the look on my face, she froze and started walking again.

"I'm not done with you," I snarled. If she knew better she would stop getting into her car.

Before she could slam or lock the door, I grabbed her roughly by her arm not caring in being nice or gentle. Hell, where did that get me?

"But I am done with you," she snapped furiously, struggling against me.

I tried to pull her out of the truck but she held her weight inside. Sobbing harder when I succeeded in yanking her out of the driver's side, she barely landed on her feet while still gripping the door. I tore her hands away and slammed the door shut.

"Let go of me Edward!" she protested trying to get free from my grasp.

"You couldn't help yourself for a day, huh?" I growled.

"What are you talking about?" she cried harder.

"Edward, let go of her _now_!" Alice tried to push me away from Bella, but it was useless. Less then a second later, Emmett succeeded in dragging me back a little. I put a fight, trying to keep close to Bella, but I knew I had to restrain myself from doing something I'll regret later.

"Dude you're losing it."

I ignored Emmet's cries and Alice's complaints, fixing my eyes at Bella. Her tear-stained face stared back at me in fear.

"You had to shove your tongue down his throat didn't you?" I snapped venomously, not holding back an inch of anger.

Her face switched from fear to confusion to to shock to hurt in a matter of seconds.

"What do you . . ." Bella whispered. Alice remained quiet, keeping her thoughts to herself watching Bella and I.

"Was it that hard for you Bella? Were you really missing a dick between your legs!?"

She turned away looking horrified at the harshness of my words. But I caught how she shut her eyes in pain; of course she was in pain! I had just announced she was a whore to everyone.

Once again she met my gaze with fire in her eyes.

"It wasn't like that!" she snapped.

I saw Alice turned around to Bella, shock evident on her face.

Emmett's hold on me loosened a bit.

"Bella?" Alice muttered.

"It meant NOTHING!" she yelled at me. "How can you possibly get freaked out by a mindless stupid kiss?"

Luckily, Emmett was in the way before I reached to her.

"Did you take Jacob's virtue away Bella? Why would you do that?" I asked harshly.

"Oh my god!" she cried out loud grabbing her head in her hands turning around to get back to her truck.

"Clearly you felt the need to hide it!" I accused. She stopped with a look of defeat in her eyes. I had her there.

I nodded at her slowing my attempts of allowing me near her.

"Well, at least we're safe to say we can get out of this relationship in one piece," I said with every inch of sadness I felt.

"Have a happy New Year Bella!" I shouted into the night air with a loud laugh walking back down to the mansion ignoring every bone in my body telling me to go and drag her back with me.

********

I'll send the next chapter to my beta in a few minutes :D hang in there.

And please let me know your thoughts will ya'?? :D


	16. Mistake after mistake

**Author's Note:** there are warnings: lemon coming! And im sorry Edward's an ass! I would have to put an end to his ….well…assness..??? xD I hope I don't scare you off xD

But seriously…he would have to do some work on his attitude so I have to work on that still.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR replying. :)

Special thanks to **margarita** for being my beta :D

***

**Bella's POV:**

I crawled into a ball that night and cried myself to sleep. I tried very hard to erase memories of the painful words Edward had spat at me. He hadn't even given me a chance to explain, and when he did all I could come up with was the classic: 'It didn't mean anything'.

I was not giving up though. I would explain to him that what had happen between Jake can I was a misunderstanding and nothing more. But first before I found the strength to do that I had to stop crying.

The alarm clock by my bed read 12:15 AM.

"Happy New Year Bella," I said to myself, more tears streaming down my cheeks.

Suddenly, I heard noises outside of my window but I dismissed them. They weren't loud enough to get me out of the bed. That's when I heard the knocking on door but I still didn't get up. All my house lights were off so whoever it was should get the clue that no one home.

"C'mon Bella! Get up!" Edward's voice shouted loud and clear, he started ringing my door bell repeatedly.

I shuddered, I could hear the raspy tone in his words knew that he was still piss-ass drunk. Trying to make myself believe that because he was drunk, he didn't really mean what he but I knew that it wasn't true.

"C'MON WE'RE GONNA PARTY!" Edward slurred. A sob tore from my lips, wracking through my body. Unable to bear it, I shot up and slammed the window shut pulling the curtains closed hoping to all the gods he wouldn't dare to try and force his way in.

He was standing underneath my window now. I could tell because his voice sounded a lot closer.

"Move your ass Isabella."

I did move, but only to go to Charlie's room and cry myself to sleep on his bed.

When I woke up it was past 11 in the morning. Lucky me – half the day was gone. He must have left last night.

Good.

I took a shower trying to wash away the sadness of Edward's words. I tried telling myself that I didn't do anything wrong. I was only hanging out with friends. First, I hung out with Edward, then with Jacob. So what? It was the same as hanging out with Angela and Ben! Jacob was just another friend. Nothing more.

Except the reason I was with Jake was not just to be with a friend. In the back of my mind, I knew there might be more and I wanted to know what was really going on between us. I guess found out, and Edward did as well.

After toweling off, I changed into a jean skirt and a long-sleeved pink shirt. I quickly made a simple sandwich, thinking what I was going to say once I got to the Cullen household. Sigh. It wasn't gonna be pretty.

Truthfully, I only wanted Edward's arms wrapped around me now. I wanted to get past the hostile attitude and sexual tension. For one moment I wanted to look into his eyes as he looked into mine so he could see I only wanted him, I only _needed_ him.

_I'd spent the last two hours playing Super Mario and Edward was getting fed up with the lack of attention. I sat there between his legs with his chest pressed against my back. He was trying to get my attention but I was so caught up with the game I'd been playing that I couldn't bring myself to turn around and jump him, like I usually did. _

"_Edward, stop! Oh no! Dammit! Get away! Get away!" I screeched motioning my control to the side as if it was Mario, while trying to ignore Edward's hands and his hot breath on my neck. _

"_Don't . . . -jump- . . . distract . . . -jump- . . . me!" and then Mario fell into the lava crying; 'Oh no!' I cried, pushing Edward's hand off of my chest. _

"_God-dammit Edward!" I snapped wiggling forward so I could get away from him a little. I heard him sigh and he pulled me back again repositioning himself behind me. _

"_You gotta kill the Big Bully first!" he said impatiently. _

"_How am I supposed to do that!?"I said exasperated._

"_You have to push him off the platform, Bella!"_

"_Every time I get close he pushes me off! I have no chance . . ."_

_He cut me off, "You're not supposed to go up in front of him, you gotta go at him from behind!"_

"_Oh, okay," I did as he explained but once I got Mario behind Big Bully, I gave out a punch nothing happened. _

"_Edward!" I whined. _

"_Kick him!"_

"_How!!?" _

"_Jump first then press B," he yelled. I could see where this was going. _

"_I CANT! You do it!" I gave him the control but he wouldn't take it. _

"_NO! You try!" he pushed. _

"_Edward, I can't do this. Every time I try, he turns around and pushes me. I can't!" _

_Edward was starting to lose his patience, "You wanted to play the god-damn game! NOW DO IT!" _

_I screamed in frustration and threw the control off the bed stalking to the bathroom. _

_He laughed at me, but didn't follow. _

"_Get back here Bella." _

_I walked out of the bathroom with one of his sweatshirts wrapped around me. I sat on the bed with my head on the headboard and my knees on my chest. _

"_Finish this," he ordered, tilting his head to the side so he could look at me. _

"_I don't want to, it's a stupid game," I pouted._

"_Finish what you started Bella." _

"_Leave me alone." _

_He picked up the control off the floor and sat beside me pulling me onto his lap. I couldn't move, even if I struggled he was much stronger than me. _

_The control was in my hands but I refused to play. I glared at him._

"_I'm not gonna play!" _

"_Yes you are," he said, taking my hands to take the stupid glowing red control. "You can do this." _

_With one more sigh I tried again, following his instructions carefully. _

"_Run to the end of the platform," Edward explained._

_I did but I went a little too far. "Oh no!"_

"_BUT DON'T FALL."_

_I screamed again frustrated at him for making me do this. _

_But I quite enjoying watching him get all freaked out. _

"_Ok, ok go again," he said. Once I was at the end of the platform, the Big Bully followed me running after me like hell. _

"_Oh God!" I panicked. _

"_Once he's over the edge you have to run to the side quickly so he won't push you!"_

_I moved fast, and once he was off the edge I kicked him. _

"_Kick him!" Edward cried._

"_Oh my God, I did it!" I laughed clapping my hands, he smiled up at me. My favorite smile. _

"_You're proud of me," it wasn't a question it was a fact. _

"_Of course" he nodded. _

"_You can't leave me," I shook my head wrapping my arms around his neck. "I wouldn't be able to finish Mario," I grinned sitting up to sweetly press my lips on his. _

"_I wasn't planning on it," he said seriously, his eyes were glowing and I smiled, capturing his lips with my own. _

Maybe I should just wait until the waters calm down and come back another day. I thought this while I pulled into their driveway. I was completely insane to come back here after last night.

However, running away from my problems wasn't going solve anything and since I'm already here I might as well just deal with them.

If he felt the need to be even more of a jerk, I could always walk away and come back another day. And I knew I would come back no matter how poorly he treated me, because I needed to work this out. I couldn't just lose him to a stupid, meaningless kiss that was forced on me.

I took a deep breath while I messed with my hair taking the strength to step in and get it over with already.

I didn't bother knocking. We're in the middle of Christmas break but I knew Esme was at work and Carlisle was . . . well . . . gone. So, I just opened the door and found the whole Mansion empty.

Good.

That is until I went upstairs. I rapped on his door lightly with two fingers and stepped in. Surprisingly, Edward was awake sitting at the end of his bed, apparently, having a one-on-one conversation with Alice.

I leaned my head on the door waiting for them to notice me. Edward's eyes tilted up to meet mine and his gaze was lost for a second. I could tell he was tired, very tired. Alice gripped Edward's hand while she got up. I moved aside as she walked out giving me a nasty glare. I closed the door behind me, pleading with my eyes for him to make this easier for me.

**Edward's POV:**

I barely slept last night. After my huge fight with Bella, I went back to my room and locked myself up. I didn't want anyone sticking their noses in my business.

One, I didn't want them to think of Bella as a slut. Despite the fact that I called her that, I didn't want them to judge her in any way. Don't know why, I just didn't want that. Secondly, I was too much of a mess to be seen like this. I don't know I actually started crying, but when I looked at myself in the mirror my eyes were red.

So, I sat on my bad and finished the rest of the brown liquid I had in one swift motion. I ignored the burning as it went down my throat; hell, I was already aching and burning somewhere else.

The night wasn't supposed to go happen this way. I had promised myself I would lead her to my bedroom and then yell at her. That didn't happen obviously. I had thought of the many ways to deal with the situation but seeing her in that ridiculously short dress didn't allow me to think straight. I didn't want to wait, I couldn't wait.

Why give her any more time to spread her legs for anyone else?

Alice knocked on my door countless times last night asking me to come out. Emmett followed telling me they were going to the club. After a while, Esme stopped by too, asking if I needed anything or if I wanted to talk about it.

I spoke to no one, I replied to no one. As far as they knew, I had all but killed myself.

Later on, I stumbled downstairs and walked out to my car. I drove straight to Bella's house.

After shouting out loud insanities and profanities, I went down home, but I got no sleep.

The knock on the door brought me back to present.

Alice.

"Hey."

"Hey." I nodded, letting her know it was okay to come inside.

"How are you holding up?" I shrugged my shoulders, really grateful for their concern but not really in the mood to talk about it now, or ever.

"Edward, what happen?" she sighed frustrated, I wasn't up for sharing.

"Don't . . . Al . . ." I pleaded.

"I need to know"

I pulled my jeans up while searching for something, anything that would keep my gaze away from Alice.

"Edward!" she said adamantly, I turned to look at her brushing my hair with my hands.

"What you said last night . . . is it true?" concern and a little bit of angst was in her eyes. I stared at her for the longest time not moving or saying anything, and then when I saw she wasn't going anywhere I nodded.

She sat on the bed sighing sadly. I sat beside her, my body felt like a dead corpse and I still couldn't believe I managed to move.

"Are you sure? I mean it was probably nothing or a misunderstanding."

I cut her off before she could defend her friend.

"No misunderstanding. I drove by, I saw her on his steps with her mouth on his. And she was enjoying it."

Alice looked at me weirdly, probably thinking this was not Bella and that I was exaggerating

"Well . . . she wasn't pulling away," I continued.

"What happen then?"

"I didn't stay for the whole show Alice . . ." I snapped but she cut me off.

"What gives you the right to suppose they went all the way!? Just a kiss!?" she snapped back.

"I don't care if they went all the way Alice!" I yelled. "She still snuck out and didn't tell me anything about it!"

I turned around to face her, "If there was nothing wrong with what she did why she feel the need to hide it from me!?"

"You don't give her freedom or choice in anything . . ."

"She went to see him Alice! Of all people! You know she feels something for him! There's always been something there."

"I'm sorry she kissed him," she sighed.

"I am too," I nodded.

"It still means nothing," she gripped my hand reassuring me everything was going to be okay.

The door was slowly opened and when I looked up there Bella was, standing like a lost puppy and she looked very tired. I almost gave into the need to go up and wrap my arms around her.

Almost.

I stared at her intently, wondering what in the world was left to say?

"Hey, can you give us a minute?" Bella asked Alice softly.

I barely saw Alice walking out the door. My eyes were focused on Bella, then I shook myself and got up. Might as well get this over with.

**Bella's POV:**

He looked odd really. I could tell he had just woken up, he wore nothing but jeans and his hair was even more of a mess. He stood up not acknowledging my presence and started to pick up some clothes from the floor.

"Hey," I whispered nervously playing with my hands. All I got was a nod.

I looked down at the floor.

"Can we talk about this?" when I lifted my gaze, I was surprised at the tears welling up in the back of my eyes.

He didn't look at me; he didn't even turn around so I kept staring at his muscular back.

Before I had time to think, I made my way to him and brushed his arm with my hand, trying to get his attention.

"Edward please," I begged, my voice breaking at the end.

He turned around and faced me; I could tell his eyes were tired and red, with bags underneath them. I took both of his hands in mine and guided him to sit on the bed, next to each other where I hoped we could share a conversation without yelling and screaming.

I looked down at our hands, and I realized I missed the heat of his palms. I could feel his eyes boring into me. We were so close to each other that only our heavy breathing could be heard in the room.

There was pain in his eyes and I felt the need to wrap my arms around him and to make it go away.

"I don't know what you saw or heard but nothing happen," I pleaded hoping he'd believe me.

He looked down on his lap taking a deep breath; I was losing him. Quickly, I lifted his chin up; I didn't realize we were so close until his eyes met mine. I still had my hand on his face.

"Please."

All of the sudden he leaned in and crashed his lips on mine. There was nothing sweet about it. Somehow, the kiss didn't feel right; it was full with impatience and . . . harshness?

I tried to move back a little but his hand grabbed my neck roughly. He continued to force his lips on my own, demanding access to my mouth which I gladly gave.

I tried to tell myself I was being forgiven and he was leaving it all behind. But there was something about his rough moves, of how he pushed me against the bed crushing me with his whole weight that didn't feel right.

He pulled back a little, but it wasn't enough for me to see his eyes, instead he lifted me by my legs and pulled me up into the bed. I took his face in my hands before he had time to kiss me again.

"I love you," I whispered desperately trying to get him to say something. His just had an intense glare. In fact, I thought I saw anger but I shook it off letting him take my hands from his face so he could kiss me again.

He parted my legs with his hand and positioned himself between them; the skirt was making it a little bit difficult for him to be completely against me so he lifted it up quickly. His breathing was heavy and I could feel his arousal against me. I moaned as his hot breath fell on my neck.

His lips ravished my neck laying kisses everywhere. Nibbling strongly.

I brought my hands up to his well defined abs but as soon as I made contact with his hot skin he took my hands off pulling them above my head.

"Keep your hands to yourself," he ordered huskily. I could sense and hear the harshness and frowned. Maybe this was not the best idea.

"Edward, please forgive me," I pleaded with him.

He brought one hand between my legs, but it was not to touch me. Instead, he unzipped his jeans pulling his boxers down with them, my panties came next tugging at them down enough for him to do the deed.

I tried to bring my lips to his, but he pulled his head away fixing his gaze directly into my eyes. He glared at me before he plunging himself into me, the first time thrusting up so harshly my back arched up from the bed.

If this was what it took to make calm his anger and let me in then I would do it. I pulled myself up to take his mouth but he once again tore away from me.

"Please," I begged, moaning when he thrust hard once again. Pounding in and out of me. In and out.

It hurt a little. First because it had been awhile since we sex, and second because he did nothing to keep his pace steady, gentle and sweet. No. It was hard, rough and fast.

He always liked it rough, but there was a reason behind this time I could tell.

His mouth attacked mine once again and I gladly gave permission, his tongue dancing along with my own. All my body gave in to his touch, every inch of it craved for more. Even if it was not sweet and slow, if this was all I could get from him then I was going to take it, and then hope for the best.

"Oh God! Edward!" I moaned, filling the room with my moans of pleasure.

The bed shook violently against the wall, as his pace went faster. I tightened around his length when I felt my own release coming; he gripped my hips firmly so I would stay still. He was focused on his own needs, slamming back and forth into me until he finally took one last thrust and then he was done. I wasn't. I was close but not done.

He was though and he let me know it.

He got up, pulling on his boxers and zipping up his jeans. He didn't so much as glance my way when he broke my heart.

"I'm done. You can leave now," he said coldly and turned away giving me his back pretending to be searching for something on his desk. I stood there shocked, mouth wide open.

I pulled my skirt down, grabbed my underwear and climbed off the bed immediately.

"Edward," I pleaded with him. "Let's talk about this."

"I said I was done," he said raising his voice not turning around, letting my words hang in the air.

I couldn't breathe at that point. I didn't give him time to say anything further, not that he would have. I ran out of the room, slamming the door behind me and leapt down the stairs, tears falling down my face washing away my pride and dignity. Giving myself to him was the biggest error in judgment I could have made.

And I was going to feel the repercussions of that mistake in the days to come.


	17. Offers

**Author's Note: **Firstly I want to thank all of you for those amazing responses, I never thought I'd get that response from last chapter, and hearing about some people's past relationships it's a big hit. Like somebody said; there are some people that are into a hurtful and abusive relationship, I'll just have to figure out how to handle this, cause, changing over night its not realistic at all.

Oh I've got a lot of people to thank! :D Like **margarita **for being my beta!

Now Thank you very much for the replies: **TequieroEdward**,** domiqueanne**,** jesben196**, **spuffytwilightdantanachair-luv, hotemochick, EllyCullen,** **EdwardsCandyCane** (Exactly my thoughts, there are some people that are into that, and im trying to see how can I handle his change), **LeahKnox**, (No of course not, that's where im not going, cause changing over night doesn't work with me, cause that's not realistic at all, it will take its time) **Igazeinwonder** (I really appreciate the words you put in there, and im glad you think so! I hope I keep working on good) **Trinity.94, DarkAngelRakel, NYBellaNa, Snickerjets, mamato **(you'll have to stick around to find out, understand edward's realy hurt and doesn't know how to work his emotions other then being angry and taking it out on everybody), **Taybaskt22, CloehMucmurry, Soccer16, Mars32, Pyrowhore, lanabelle22, hoot13 **

**Woow that was a lot of people!**

**Important fact: **I GOT A LOT of questions about, if Bella was going to be pregnant or if she's on the pill, no this story its not going for a pregnant issue, she's on the pill but I'll have to explain that later, why was she when she was not active seeing she was not with Edward. But she knew they will get close even if they were not together you never know with those two, they're hormones! Tsk tsk.

**Bella's POV:**

Day One: Cried my eyes out.

Day Two: Cried my eyes out.

Day Three: Left my room . . . to go to the bathroom.

Day Four: Left my room again to go downstairs to get something to eat.

Day Five: Picked up the phone to answer when Charlie called, and only Charlie.

Day Six: Let Angela come over, we ate ice cream.

And that's pretty much how I got through my first week after giving in to Edward. I didn't have much time to cry more over it because school started soon, and I was not about to give Edward the satisfaction of seeing me heartbroken.

Not a chance in hell.

So I did what I do best; I pushed my feelings aside and got on with my life. I decided to start over.

I picked up my studies where I left off, focusing 24/7 so I could pass English with Angela's help. Fortunately that didn't leave me time to think about . . . the devil himself.

I had expected him to come barging into my house or have the phone ring off the hook with non-stop calls, but none of that happened. Instead I was met with silence. No explanations and no questions.

He had kicked me out of his home after he gotten what he wanted. He had used me and then dumped me, like some hooker.

This was how he got even. It was totally twisted and went against all my morals. Once again I was the stupid girl who trusted him and fell for his ploy of believing he was giving me a second chance or at least hearing my side and working through it with me.

"Bella, you there?" Angela waved her hand in front of me; I gave her an unconvincing smile.

"Something you want to talk about?" she dragged her spoon to her mouth, glancing at me with concern.

"I'm fine," I said as pushed my hands through my hair, refusing to meet her gaze.

"Is there something going . . . on . . . with . . . Edward?" she asked hesitantly. I looked at her slowly letting her know I was okay but I didn't feel like talking about it.

We were watching Harry Potter 4 but I was not really paying attention, my mind was elsewhere. And it didn't really help that the actor who played Cedric Diggory had a unique and familiar resemblance to Edward.

"He's hot," Angela mumbled when he dove into the water, I nodded without paying attention.

"Well Bella, I'm gonna call it a night," Angela mumbled while getting up. I nodded once again without saying a word and walked her out.

"I still have to finish a paper and I want to have it done before school tomorrow so . . ." she put her coat on while I opened the door for her.

"I guess I'll see you then?" she asked.

"Of course," I reassured her. I was not about to skip school and have a pity party at home.

"Okay," she smiled, and out of nowhere she hugged me tightly. "Its gonna be okay Bella."

I prevented the tears from falling; I knew I was really not ready to face him tomorrow. If I couldn't not cry when I remembered what happened, I was definitely not up to seeing him.

"See you," I smiled and waved at her as she finally got in her car.

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It's gonna be a long day, I could tell! When I pulled into the school parking lot I didn't notice a single Cullen car in sight, but I knew it wouldn't take them long to show up.

"Bella!" I heard someone shout. Tyler. I grabbed my bag and crossed the lot, joining the group.

"Hey guys," I smiled waving at them.

"How were the holidays!?" an enthusiastic Eric wrapped his arm around my shoulder, everybody groaned at him, including me.

"How can you be so thrilled with school starting?" Jessica whined.

"How can you be so happy so early in the morning?" I groaned letting out a laugh, soon everybody followed.

He took his arm off and gave us all a fake smile.

"Well I'm sorry you guys are so grumpy, but I'm happy to find my closest friends together again," he wrapped his arm around Tyler and Lauren's shoulders earning an 'eww' from her and a look from Tyler.

"Dude seriously, get away."

"Are you high?" Mike asked him seriously concerned.

Everybody laughed as Eric did an uncoordinated dance.

I heard a roar of an engine that I've grown particularly familiar with. I knew what to expect that's why I didn't bother to turn around and watch the jeep pull up.

Some of the group did turn but then they lost interest knowing it was just the Cullen's making their majestic entrance.

"Oh, we should get to class," Angela jumped out of her seat looking at her wrist watch. I silently thanked her as everybody started gathering their bags and walking to the school doors.

"Where's Ben?" I knew well enough that he would support Edward in every little prank they would try, so when Angela hadn't mentioned him and he hadn't shown up I knew something was wrong.

"We kinda . . . got into a fight," she pushed her hands into her jacket pockets, I frowned.

"What happen?"

"He's an ass, nothing to worry about, we'll work it out."

I've heard that one before.

I got caught up in the moment and didn't realize we were the last ones still in the back of the group. Everybody else was already inside when suddenly somebody ran past me in quickly to stand at the door entrance and hold it open for us.

Edward.

Of course.

"Ladies," he gave me an intelligent-looking smirk as if he'd had the final say. I didn't pay him any attention and kept walking, ignoring how he stood purposely close so I had to brush his shoulder to get inside. I was really fed up and didn't care what he was thinking.

But to him, I guess the game – that I didn't even want to play - wasn't over yet.

He wanted to mess with me even more.

Angela gave me a look biting her lower lip.

"You okay?" she whispered low enough so only I could hear her.

I nodded, shrugging my shoulders dismissing the moment.

I ignored that he was just steps behind me. Trying to taunt me with that stupid smirk on his face while burning a hole in my head with an intense stare.

I was done caring.

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"You're not supposed to squish it like that!" I laughed at Mike as he tried to work on his bio project. He sat beside me at _our _table, meaning Edward's and my table, but I was glad he did. I was sure not to deal with Edward right now. Or ever again.

"Well, it doesn't really help with you laughing at it, you might hurt its feelings," he snapped seriously, furrowing his eyebrows. I just kept laughing, until Edward walked into the room, not giving anyone else a second glance, and going straight to _our_ table.

Automatically, I straightened up in my seat, the smile falling from my face. My change was drastic, apparently, because Mike noticed. He stared at me in confusion then he shifted his gaze up when Edward's book slammed on the table. Mike met Edward's stare with a bright grin on his face.

"I believe you're sitting in my seat Newton," he spat the name harshly.

I stared at him in disbelief. Was he seriously planning on giving me more of his crap?

Mike appeared as if shocked, but something about his expression let me know he was faking it. As if his 'surprise' was totally part of a game he was playing with Edward. Well, that was new!

"Well, I believe the semester's done."

I frowned, wondering what Mike was up to, and by now most of our classmates had our attention.

"So that means . . ." he continued, letting the sentence hang unfinished, letting Edward do it instead. That only earned him a snarky smirk from Edward which quickly changed into a sneer while he grabbed Mike's shirt collar harshly.

"Don't mess with me Newton!" he spat.

"New partners!" Mike continued good-naturedly. "We're done! It shouldn't take you too long to find someone new."

A smile escaped my lips. My friends were really trying to keep Edward away from me. I was touched. These were people who I had hurt in the past by ignoring them and pretending they weren't there.

I was such a bitch! God, I loved my friends and promised myself right then that I wouldn't ever treat them like that again.

"Let go of him Edward!" I sighed in frustration giving him an eye roll.

He wasn't too happy with me.

"Is there a problem Mr. Cullen?" Mr. Varner came in with his usual frown. Edward's hold on Mike didn't budge though.

"Now Edward!" I spat under my breath.

Edward glared while Mike sat back with an innocent smile. Finally, Edward moved over to sit down beside Angela. I looked over to see if she was okay. She winked at me with a nod.

"OH . . . yes, right!" Mr. Varner had seemed to notice the change of seats. "Change of partners."

"Everyone take Edward's example," I heard Edward growl under his breath. Right! Like it was his choice.

I laughed at Mike shoving him off a little.

"You're so stupid." He just grinned back at me.

Stupid indeed. Stupid like a fox.

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"Look guys, I really appreciate your concern and all you're doing but I don't want you to put yourselves out there . . . look . . ."

But they cut me off instantly.

"Look Bella, Edward needs someone to put him in his place from time to time," Mike said gently.

"And besides Bella, we weren't gonna let him get away with hurting you anymore," Angela continued, wrapping her arm around me. I took her hand, really grateful to have them as friends, but they couldn't stop Edward. No one could.

I felt impatient and anxious wondering what else there was left for us to say?

Clearly he had his 'say'. He had used and hurt me in the process. What more did he want?

"Hey Bella!" That velvet voice shook me out of my thoughts. I didn't stop. "Bella wait!"

Mike turned around ignoring my pulling on his hand to keep moving.

"Move it Newton!" I heard Edward order.

Mike didn't say anything despite what had happened in biology. He knew once Edward was this close, without teachers around, he was trouble. Still it was sweet of him to stay with like this

"Go on Mike," I brushed my hands on his shoulders gesturing him to go on.

He looked at me.

"Bella!"

"I'm okay," I smiled. "I'll catch up with you guys later." I said to Angela when Mike finally started walking. They kept going as I turned around to meet Edward who had a look of surprise on his face.

"Wow . . . that was really sweet."

I decided to keep walking again as he continued to stalk me. Sticking to me like a leech.

"What is it Edward?" I said wearily with out a trace of harshness or anger. Argh! I was just tired. Tired of his BS.

"We started off on the wrong foot today," he declared giving me a look. I didn't look back.

"I didn't mean to interfere between you and Mike like that . . . I mean he was totally asking for it, but I'm willing to settle and step back," he stated calmly.

I stopped dead in my tracks, not believing the words coming out of his mouth.

"Yeah, cause you've done such a good job of _that_ so far!" I spat not believing we were actually having this conversation after what happened a week ago! Was he ever gonna bring that up? I'd be willing to talk about that, instead of his lame fights with Mike and the rest of Forks High's male population.

"Let me finish," he continued giving me a clever grin.

I crossed my arms against my chest as he took a step closer to me.

"All I'm saying is that I know how to share, I mean . . . besides it's not like poor Mikey doesn't deserve a _booty call_ from time to time."

I look at him horrified. Was he actually saying what I thought he was? I turned around immediately, not taking any more of his bullshit. I swear I was going to slap him if I stayed there another second.

"C'mon let me finish!" he grabbed my arm pulling me back. I yanked away.

He kept going, "Look, I know it was wrong of me to be so harsh on him, but that's why I'm willing to settle." He had a wicked grin on his face as if he'd just had the brightest idea in the world. "So, I mean . . . I think it's better for all of us, if we just decided to not be exclusive, you know?"

I stared at him in disappointment and pain. But I was not about to cry, let alone in front of him!

That was not happening.

"So this way everybody gets their chance Bella! And you're not doing anything wrong!"

I shook my head, turning around immediately to walk away so he wouldn't see the water welling up in my eyes.

Edward wasn't done. "So you don't have to sneak out to get in somebody else's bed and I, on the other hand, am not playing stupid anymore!"

I quickened my pace. I didn't have to take this verbal abuse from anyone, let alone the person I 'thought' I loved.

"Wait! Bella what is it?" he asked faking concern grabbing me and holding my arm. He brushed his hand on my cheek which I pushed off.

"Isn't that enough for you?" he asked.

"Have fun Edward," I gave him a curt nod while I tried to walk away again. But he took me by my waist even as I shifted away from his touch.

"C'mon! What is it?" he prodded. "You'd like to gain something out of all this? Is that it?" he looked at my, trying to search my eyes which were shifting everywhere. I didn't want to look at him. The bastard. He knew I was about to burst out crying.

"That's okay babe," he said suggestively. "Money is not an issue with me to have a nice time," he pushed his body against mine and that's when I snapped! I shoved him harshly, hitting his chest. It sent him a few steps but he was still wearing that disgusting grin.

"You know Edward; you really make this a lot easier for me? I'm just gonna tell you this one last time: STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME! You're really just a little boy who can't deal with his problems by talking so you just feel the need to humiliate people, trying to put them down but you know what?" I stated looking at him square in the eye. "I will never stoop so low to your level. So stop trying! Do you feel better now? Feel like a big man? Okay so you're perfect! Good. MOVE ON because I am – finally I am!"

And with that speech, I stalked away, not giving him time to even collect his thoughts.

"So is that a yes?" he sneered mockingly.

Breathe Bella, breathe.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I couldn't wait to get home. I was about to burst I could feel it. However, I surprised myself by not crying, uhmm . . . maybe I was getting tougher.

I had wanted to talk to him about what happen the last time we saw each other. It was on the tip of my tongue but I didn't do it, I didn't say anything!

Instead of trying to talk to me reasonably, he treated me once again like I was some call girl he could hire whenever he wanted!

Was he ever gonna stop harassing me?

Would he get bored eventually?

I really hoped so.

I heard the door and when I step out of the kitchen I saw Charlie coming in with a suitcase in hand.

"Hey," he sighed looking very tired. He was rubbing his eyes, so didn't see how happy I was that he was home.

"Oh my God! Hi!" I hugged him, launching myself at him.

"Woow I take it you're happy to see me?"

After breaking up with Edward, I notice how close I had become with Charlie, and how lonely I felt when he wasn't around. I also realized I had a great group of friends, real friends who cared about me.

So there was definitely nothing wrong in letting go, I told myself.

Why did I let Edward get to me like this?

**Edward's POV:**

I was an ass.

A complete jerk.

The spawn of Satan.

Lucifer himself.

Whatever, right!?! I was nearly bursting with anger, and it got the best of me. It happens! Right?

Damn I screwed up.

Not only did I dumped her after sex, not caring about her needs at all, the other day, but I just propositioned her for a repeat performance for money like she was some common whore. That must be the lowest blow, even for me. She told me herself. Actually, I was surprised she fought back with the fury and rage I used to see in her. I like that Bella.

Every one of my instincts was screaming at me to stop this insanity, even as I was saying those cruel words. I could hear it in my head: 'Stop Edward. Talk to her and find out what really happened Edward. Stop hurting her Edward. Be mature Edward and approach it like a sane and normal person.' But the thought or mention of 'him' and Bella near each other, let alone in the same sentence, just filled me with fury that was coming out of every pore on my body.

So, of course, I couldn't just shut up and listen to her. I couldn't sit there and hear how it happen . . . or if he used tongue or not. Damn stop thinking like that Edward. I'm just going to make myself angrier.

I was losing it bad!

I might as well try again, right? Sigh. I picked up my phone and texted Bella: 'Lets talk'.

A minute later I had my answer.

'Screw you'.

Mmhhm . . . breathe Edward, breathe . . . I hold myself not to text her back with an 'I'd rather screw you.' I went the safe route instead: 'I want to talk about this'.

I held the phone in my hand waiting for her response; which came next:

'Why? So you can keep offering me money? Guess I'd better get something for my time'.

I sighed. She was not going to make it easy for me.

Bitch.

'You reconsider my offer?'

Damn. I was an ass. Why did I do that? She was obviously still pissed at me about earlier.

'Stay away from me, I'm serious'.

Bitch! I just wanted to talk.

Damn . . . I _was_ an ass.


	18. Blue eyed Boys

**Author's Note: **I hate myself for updating with a chapter so short :S but at least its something different for what I've been giving you, hopefully you'll like :D

Im still shocked with the response I get from you :O it never seems to stop amazing me, you guys really are committed to this and I hope I don't disappoint :)

And a special shout out to my beta **margarita**! Thank you *hugs*

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**Edward's POV:**

I hadn't spoken to or seen Bella in what felt like years, centuries even. She seemed to have really kept her promise about moving on. She was doing everything in her power to avoid me and ignore my teasing taunts in class or hallways when I was trying to break her in front of everyone.

She just _ignored_ me. She actually ignored me!

"When are you planning in doing something about this, Edward?" Sitting on the sofa, Alice swatted the top of my head with her magazine. I twisted giving her a hard look.

"About what?"

"What do you mean 'what'!!?" she gave me a dumbfounded look. "About _Bella_!"

I shrugged my shoulders not really in the mood to get into this discussion again.

"She'll come back," I said as confidentially as I could, getting comfortable on the couch, putting an arm under my head to watch TV.

"She is not coming back Edward! Get that through your thick skull. She's left you for good, and you being an asshole won't bring her back!"

"I thought you were on my side?" I snapped, not looking at her

"I am because I'm your sister! But I won't encourage you being a prick! Have you tried to listen to what she's got to say?"

"I don't really want to hear all the details, Alice, if you don't mind. I still have some dignity left."

She smacked me once again, harder.

"Alice!" I complained.

"And how was offering her money like she was some kind of a hooker going to resolve your problem?" she snapped.

At this I stood up, giving her a worried and confused glance.

"How did you know about that?" My tone was filled with resentment and accusation.

"You like to be loud Edward. It's not that hard for anybody to hear everything you're shouting when your in a public hallway!"

I groaned. So this meant people had known what I said to Bella, and they were probably gossiping and talking about her . . . judging her.

Sigh.

Nice one, Edward!

Bella must think I'm an ass.

Well, this wouldn't have happened if she had just talked to me when I asked her to instead of making me chase her while she was whoring around with Michael _freaking_ Newton! She asked for it! Right?

But deep down, I didn't feel right. I didn't like people thinking of Bella that way. She's not a whore.

"Stay out of it Alice," I warned taking my jacket, not giving her a second glance. Head down, eyes glued to the floor in shame, I walked out of the door.

I didn't know where I was going. I just needed to get out and clear my head.

**Bella's POV:**

I am going to kill him! I swear to God! If it's the last thing I do, I was going to rip his testicles off and feed them to stray dogs!

"Don't sweat it sugar cakes!" the handsome blonde, blue-eyed stranger laughed with a smug grin.

"YOU JUST DROVE OVER MY FENCE!" I screamed for the hundredth time, but before he could respond I snapped at him again "AND DON'T EVER CALL ME SUGAR CAKES!"

"Aww . . . C'mon I was complimenting you, would you prefer if I called you Casper? It suits you . . . you're as tan as he is," he smirked with those baby blues glinting arrogantly, crossing his arms against his chest and leaning over his flaming red car.

"What the hell is your problem!!?? Are you mentally challenged or can just not, for the life of you, drive properly!!?" I retorted menacingly taking a step closer. Of course, this didn't alarm him in the least, he was still laughing.

"You call _that_ a fence?" he snorted pointing to what was left of our house's white picket fence, now discarded over the lawn.

"And you call _that_ parking?" I taunted.

"Touché," he smirked at me, letting his gaze rove up and down my body.

"Forks just got a little bit sweeter," he mumbled to himself but I heard him.

That was _it_! I picked up the green hose that was lying on the grass and ran to turn it on. Not thinking twice I just doused him with water.

"I hope this cools you off, you arrogant jerk," I yelled.

"YOU WOULDN'T DARE . . . STOP THAT!" he said alarmed, but too late he was soaked from head to toe.

I burst out laughing.

"Are you going to move mister butthead?"

He stopped glancing up at me for a second.

"Butthead? Really? Is that the best you can do?" he grinned.

Arrghh . . . he really had some balls.

I turned the hose on as far as I could and kept splashing him with water. He ran trying to get away and before I could stop him, he had snatched the hose from me.

"Get off!!" I yelled as I struggled with him for control.

But the grass was wet and I was clumsy as hell. I fell and he took full advantage, grabbing the hose and wetting me in return.

I yelped trying to get up but failing miserably. Just as I was getting on my feet, I felt myself falling back yet again. But blue-eyes caught me in his arms, all while keeping the hose on me so I was completely as drenched as he was.

"I really think we got off on the wrong foot, _neighbor,_" he laughed heartedly over my yelling.

"Asshole!" I screamed kneeing him in the groin. He grunted in pain letting me go so I landed on the grass with a thud. I tried to grab the hose but he twirled away with it in his hands. He was still in pain, but wouldn't budge on releasing it.

I ran and turned it off so he couldn't keep soaking me with the ice cold water.

Somewhere along our 'fight', I hadn't noticed Edward's car pulling into my driveway. I was surprised when I saw that he was approaching us with a menacing look on his face.

This day was getting better and better.

I huffed, not paying him any mind. Right now my anger was firmly trained on the hunky, blue-eyed boy in front of me. Wait that was a first! I wasn't focused on Edward!

"Oh, c'mon sugar! No reason to freak out," he groaned out despite his pain.

Strangely enough, blue-eyes wasn't angry. I had yelled at him, kick him in the groin, doused him with ice cold water, insulted him and called him names. Yet he was still looking at me in _amusement_. It this was Edward, he would have been LIVID!

"I want that fence fixed by tomorrow, **DICK**!!" I spat pointing at him and the fence with a menacing glare.

By now, Edward was at my side and looking on in confusion.

"What's this?" he mumbled under his breath.

I ignored him. I so did NOT need his BS right now.

"BY TOMORROW!" I yelled at blue eyes but he just kept smirking with his eyes fixed on my face. I turned around completely pissed. I was walking back toward the house when I heard:

"Will you give me your name at least!?" blue-eyes pleaded hopefully.

I let out a high pitch scream in annoyance and whirled back glaring at him. Did nothing get to this guy?

"Beat it," I heard Edward sneer behind me with a growl.

My 'sweet' neighbor only put up his hands in mocking defense wearing that annoying smirk. I shrugged my shoulders, huffed again and stomped back to the house ignoring both of these idiots.

Argh, I was totally soaked; I was sooo going to get back at blue-eyes for this. He had nearly ruined my favorite jeans.

I slipped out of my flip flops and started to head up the stairs when suddenly I head the door open and shut behind me.

I swirled around annoyed.

"What . . .!!? What are you doing?" I demanded.

"What?" Edward replied.

"Get out of my house! What do you think you're doing!?"

"I see you found yourself another boyfriend," he snapped back.

"I said GET OUT!" ignoring his ridiculous outburst and started to go upstairs but turning back around as he tried to follow me. "Did you not hear me? Do you not speak English? I mean it Edward, get out."

"I just wanted to talk about this!" he pleaded

"You want talk about it?" I spat not in the mood bullied by him right now. "Ok, what exactly do you want to talk about? Let's see . . . Do you want talk about how you used me and had 'angry' sex then kicked me out of your house!!??"

I took a menacing step closer towards him. "Or maybe you want to talk about how you tried to humiliate me at school with your nasty taunts. Or, and stop me if I'm getting warm Edward, maybe you want to talk about how you treated me like a whore by offering me money to have sex with you?" As I advanced, Edward stepped back. I glared at him the entire time.

"Its really hard for me to think straight when you're soaking wet and wearing white you know?" he grinned slightly, looking at me up and down.

I knew him well to know he was too much of a coward to say anything now that he had his back up against the wall with no where to run and the truth at his throat like the tip of a blade.

I shook my head in disgust and turned away, but he caught my arm so I would face him.

"Bella, wait!" he sighed. "I'm sorry I . . . did . . . _that_. My anger got the best of me and . . ." he admitted. "I know I went too far. I just . . . lose it when I see you with . . ."

"That's YOUR problem Edward!" I snapped furiously, even if he admitted the problem it didn't make it any better.

"I miss you," he whispered giving me his best puppy eyes glinting with sadness. His hands tugged at my waist not daring to pull me closer. This was his way of anchoring himself to me, to know that I was really here, with him.

I looked him squarely in the eyes. "Well I don't," I replied cruelly, removing his hand off of mine.

He wouldn't let go. Instead, he tried threading his hands through mine putting them behind me while trying to snuggle close to me. I could feel his hot breath on my neck sending shivers up and down my body.

"Please Bella . . . you know I didn't mean anything I said, I was just . . . angry," he breathed into my ear. My heart rate was starting to speed up with each word. I was sure I would have a seizure any minute.

How could he be such an asshole and the next minute be so sweet and loving? It's like Jeykll and Hyde.

Uggh . . . I hate him for putting me through this. I just can't do this anymore.

Be strong Bella!

I sucked in a deep breath in and out and didn't respond, letting him know that his little tricks were not working this time.

He stared at me in shock and confusion as if he seemed to missing something.

"Get the picture now, Edward? It's not working this time. Get over it, move on," I said coolly, pulling out of his grasp.

I was so deeply hurt by this person I loved. I had finally learned my lesson. I knew better than to fall for one of his routine lines. No, this time, if he wanted me back, he needed to do it the right way.

"Bella! HOW . . ." he started angrily but calmed his tone when I gave him a warning glance. "How can you be such a bitch? I just want to talk about this!!"

I looked at him incredulously.

"What about when_ I_ wanted to talk about it?" I growled. "You missed your chance! TOO LATE!"

He sighed frustrated and walked to the door but not before screaming: "Call me when you get laid! You need it," and then he slammed the door behind him.

Uggghhh! He was not getting the final word! Not a chance in hell!

Yanking the door open and running after him I yelled, "I WILL! TO TELL YOU HOW GOOD IT WAS!" But he was already speeding off. When I turned around to walk back in, I caught my new neighbor grinning in amusement with his arms folded across his chest.

"Trouble in paradise?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Screw you," I mumbled giving him a glare.

"C'mon now . . . he seems to be right, you can't possibly be that . . . _uptight_, right?" blue-eyes smirked once again scanning my body with an intense glare. "I could help with that. What are neighbors for?"

I gave him a disgusted look.

"What makes you think you'd even stand a chance?" I scoffed, hands on hips.

He put his hands in the air.

"I just offered a theory. The reality . . ." he said slowly, "can't be put into words. It has to be experienced."

Damn this arrogant prick!

"Cocky jocks are so last season, hotshot! You are so transparent," I snipped, crossing my arms and walking away giving him my back.

"Apparently, so is cotton."

I sensed the arrogant tone in his voice. I stopped, eyes wide and looked down. I flushed red; my baby girl cotton beige bra was completely exposed. Damn! I was still wearing my wet t-shirt.

"Argghh!!!" I let out a high pitched screech.

"Oh, and I'm James by the way," he said pleasantly. I turned my head slowly, he was smiling widely, with a hand out tentatively and eyebrows raised. "And you are . . .?"

"Not. Interested." I gritted out harshly, teeth grinding, nostrils flared while glancing with disdain at his outstretched hand.

I stormed back to my house and slammed the door shut, retreating to the sanctuary of my bedroom where I was safe from the idiots of the world!

Blue-eyes was making me lose my mind.

Another one to add to the list.

_Great!_


	19. New feelings

**Author's Note: **guys! Im very sorry to keep you on your toes for so long and not having updated! Its just I couldn't get a hold of my beta :( so I couldn't update, and I decided to not keep you waiting any longer, but you will have to forgive me for the chapter being so raw, cause its not beta'd. :( as soon as I hear from her I'll try and have it back beta'd but for so on I think you'll have to settle…lol. Sorry

Anyways….: WOOOOWW so many updates! I HOPE YOU GUYS DON'T GET FREAKED OUT WITH JAMES! Its just a twist! And…he'll be around a lot soo sorry!

Thank you so much for the amazing reviews you guys sent :D

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**Edward's POV:**

I slammed the door shot almost turning it upside down when i did. Earning a couple of looks my way but I quickly shrugged them off, I was not in the mood to see or talk to anyone right now, if they caught my mood they will understand to stay away.

"Edward!" Alice called out to me while I ran up the stairs.

"Let him go!" Emmet's voice came next.

What I saw in Bella's face tonight was decision, she had finally moved on from me, she was totally and irrevocably starting over…without me.

I was not winning her with two or three sentences I shot her way, she was not falling for it anymore.

She didn't trust me anymore.

I had screwed up big time!

And when I found her in her driveway having a water battle field with her new 'boytoy' I grew instantly jealous and angry.

I knew Bella's ways all too much, she always fell for the hardcore bad boys, for the cocky arrogant pricks she would find in her way.

At first she would participate in the bickering and after a week she would start to date them. If I knew.

"_Look Kitten! I don't need to say this twice; you're a girl, girls don't play soccer, they play with barbies…now if you so kindly can get your little butt out of the field it would really save me a back injury" I grinned widely on her face while her eyes almost popped out of her eye balls. _

"_Oh no you didn't!" Jessica Stanley muttered from behind Bella and her crew that looked forward to play in the field. _

_And then she gave me a punch on my shoulder sending me a step back none the less. _

"_ARE you for REAL calling me FAT!!?" _

_The girl was tiny and thin as a stick but she had a problem when I called her otherwise? Didn't she know by now she could easily be blown off by a breeze? _

"_Im just saying!" I decided to taunt her a little, I loved to see her mad she had a cute way to show her frown and that fire in her eyes, God! I could stare at those fire balls forever. _

"_GET YOUR ASS OUT OF HERE CULLEN, WE GOT HERE FIRST!" _

"_What are you like five?" I furrowed my eyebrows in question but didn't let her replie "C'mon girls, if you could please move your butts a game attend us" and with a final smirk her way I turned around going back on my business that's when a ball hit the back of my head…hard. _

"_What the…" I turned around but I was only met with that skinny ass back, walking away. I smirked. _

_Not today babe._

_I soon followed her out, ignoring her yelp when I scooted her over my shoulder and force her to apologies. _

That was the first bickering of many to see, it was so long ago like 3 years ago or so. I was aware of Isabella Swan in class and she was aware of me but before that day we only give each other glares and grunts at the same time ignoring each other, she just had her way of being so superior to anyone else that annoyed the crap out of me, and I probably annoyed her too, with me…being…well…myself.

The bickering kept going for days and days, weeks later we hated each other's guts, I teased her about everything and she'll cleverly bit back smoothly.

It is how it started, then we started dating, and I guess we had fed up with each other at one point, it was not fun anymore, the arguments turned more real, and the fights included tears in her eyes, I became hostile and damaged. I don't know when that happened. It just happened I guess.

I could see that fire back on her, and I for once had nothing to do with it.

I played with my hands in my lap, stirring a little on the bed and trying to erase from my memory Bella's fight with her new neighbor, how she held the hose up in her hands and drenched him in water, how he controlled the hose over his power and soaked her body, how she fell off and was once again on her feet to give him more hard time.

I missed that.

I missed her.

I found myself thinking it might be too late to get Bella back, and as I just stood here drowning myself in self pity she was probably on her second round.

Damn.

I put my hands on my face trying to hold back my anger and jealousy, I was losing it. This Edward was the one she left.

**Bella's POV:**

"Fucking-asshole!!!" I yelled out of my lungs once I parked on my spot. Well the rage took the best of me, now not only I had a jealous-possessive-controlling ex-boyfriend on my tale, but I had also a pain in the ass of a neighbor who possessed a guitar! A freaking ELECTRIC guitar!!

Uggh…at least I was done with him for the rest of the day.

"Bella!" I heard a pitch voice call my name and I turned around to find Alice with a small smile on her face.

"Hey Alice" I sighed very confused about the new development as far as I knew the Cullen's didn't talk to me.

"Hey, im sorry about what happen between you and Edward" she played nervously with her hands as we walked down the hall.

"I am too" I nodded matter of factly.

Didn't matter if he was an ass or not, this was still Edward the guy I shared all my firsts with. The guy who hit Damien Wheeler for trying to raise my skirt up in eight grade. The guy who helped me get over my Nans and my Mother's dead.

Sigh. Edward was barely that guy anymore.

"And im sorry I was a bitch too" I shook my hand at her letting her know not to worry about it.

"You are his sister Alice its…-" but she cut me off.

"NO! Bella, please! I was a bitch, I didn't hear your side of the story…-"

"And you haven't yet" I turned to her, halting my actions.

"It doesn't matter…-" but once again I cut her off.

"Alice! I kissed Jacob!" she widened her eyes a little, but then recovered "Well…he kissed me, but I was totally calling for it…" when I went down to La Push…I said to myself.

"Bella, but…-"

"I wouldn't have expected him not to be angry…but not just to be….like…he is right now" I finished.

"Well it doesn't matter if he kissed you or vice versa, Edward went far this time!" I sighed. If he did.

"Well…it doesn't matter anymore Alice, what's done its done…-"

"Wait, you mean you're over for good?" she seemed very bewildered about this. I nodded with a sad smile on my face.

"I guess it is"

"We can still be….like friends, right?" she hoped.

"Wouldn't it be awkward?"

"Maybe, but I don't care…we can still hang out… right?" she asked me as we stepped into the classroom not looking up to see the other students or the teacher for that matter.

"_Well class, there are some news today, I want you to greet our new student that came from California, he'll be joining us since today…."_

"Right" it was not a convincing look, but it didn't have to be that bad between Alice and me, we could give it a try, but after Edward's history it would be a little hard, maybe with time and patience or till he calmed down after knowing Alice and I hang out.

Sigh. It was not gonna be easy.

"_His name is…"_

"Honey Cakes!"

I knew that voice all too well.

I looked up startled.

My day just got better and better.

"_James Riley" _

**Edward's POV:**

Missing school was probably not the best idea, not if I was planning to get Bella back, but I was not up for another rejection today. At least for the rest of the week.

I couldn't just avoid her, or school for that matter.

So I got up from my lazy butt and leapt my way down stairs, Esme gave me a quizzical look, but I went for the door not before her voice stopped me.

"Edward, wait!"

"Im going to school Esme, don't worry im not skipping"

"No, no…Edward, please wait" I sighed.

"What is it?" I really hoped she wasn't putting up the parental 'don't/miss/school' speech.

"Carlisle called" I froze.

"And…?" I crossed my arms against my chest.

"He's bringing him back here, and wanted you to know…" but before she could finish the sentence I was out of the door.

**Bella's POV:**

"What is it that you're doing here!!?" I snapped under my breath when blue-eyes sat next to me.

"C'mon! don't sweat it! You're the only friend I know here…"

"WOW…wait, wait wait!" I put my hands in the air "Friend!?? Are you kidding me?" he gave me a look like I was stupid or something.

"Well…freckles, it's a little _too_ early for our next commitment but…-" this guy was unbelievable, I cut him off with a glare.

"No, no…NO!" I pointed at him with my finger giving him a warning "FRIENDS…don't annoy the crap out of each other! And you…you…" I pocked at him with finger searching the right word or insult to snap at him but I was having a hard time doing so. He stared at me dumbfounded for a minute, I was probably looking stupid right now.

"Is this gonna take awhile cause I really like to graduate by the end of July" he turned his head around pretending to pay attention at any word Ms. Gable was saying.

Breathe Bella, breathe!

Well he fit the role perfectly, he made sure to exchange words with all the girls in class…words…numbers…whatever!

What did I care?

**Edward's POV:**

I knew it! I fucking knew it! He was gonna force me to met that…man! I was not gonna do it, not after he left me, after he throw me on the streets like you would do to a dog.

Pfftt…even dogs were treated better then that.

And I would have to deal with his usual threats, telling me how if I didn't do as he said he was gonna kick me out of the house, well then so be it!

I was not gonna meet that damn waste of skin.

What did he thought, he could just wake up one day and say; 'hey, today I care!" NO! it didn't work that way!

_I paced around the room pretending to look for something, but my anger was taking the best of me and it was not going away easily today. _

"_Edward, come on sit down for a minute" Bella's soothing voice called to me, taking my hand and pulling me down to the bed, she brushed her hand on my shoulder trying to gain my attention but I was not calming easily. _

"_What happen down there?" Bella asked, of course she would have heard the tremendous noise we made, we were loud and Carslile could raise his voice just as I could. _

"_He wants me to go down and exchange words with Masen" I spit out with venom and bitterness. Her hands brushed against my back, soothing me with calm but I needed more then that, I looked up at her and bit my lip taking her hand. _

"_C'me here" she frowned but followed as I made her straddle my waist, with my hands on her hips pulling her close, I dropped a wet kiss on her shoulder and went up to her collarbone all the way up to her neck, laying wet kisses over it, soon enough I pressed my lips gently on hers moving them along for a minute before parting her lips with my tongue, my moves got a little too rough for her cause she pulled away alarmed. _

"_Edward" she cringed away from my touch, that's when I realized I had been gripping her too tightly, quickly I released her of my hold when my hands traveled down to her tights, my mouth advancing on hers once again but she pulled away instantly pulling me back with a bewildered look on her face. _

"_Edward, c'mon!" she could see past through me soo easily. _

"_I'm not in the mood Bella" I let her know, deepening my gaze over her eyes. _

_She held my face with her hands. _

"_Talk to me" I sighed frustrated as I rolled over making her fall on her back and got up. _

_She was not having it though, easily she got up from her spot and followed me, wrapping her arms around my waist. _

"_You don't have to do anything you dont want" I nodded more to myself, but in my mind I was thinking of how I was not helping with Carslile, he had done everything to give me a home, a mother, a father, a family, so would I just turn my back on him when he always managed to make me happy? "But you could just try and see what he wants, hear him out" I growled furiously gripping my hand on her wrist to let her get off of me but her next words stopped me "For Carslile and Esme" after catching my breath I sighed. _

_Bella always knew how to see past my bullshit. _

I never did went down and see him, I didn't pay attention to Carslile warning and Bella's words, but now, Carslile went all the way down to Seattle and find the guy to bring him back, to my home, my real home. My real family.

He was doing everything on his power to make me snap out of it.

Well I was no holding any threats now, if he wanted to kick me out, then I wouldn't give him the time to tell me so I would just walk away from him, not giving him the satisfaction to pull me through that pain again.

I walked around the lot, my thoughts getting the best of me, not even paying attention when I made my way to class, ignoring everybody's shouting and calls to me, or girls throwing themselves at me looking for a 'good time' after hearing Bella dumped my ass.

I shook it off, my thoughts right now were taking the best of me. Carslile was punishing me for not dealing with…_him_.

As I neared my classroom I looked up to see none other but Bella fighting with that same guy, that douche bag.

They were having fun apparently. In the middle of the hallways, gaining everybody's attention.

That scene seemed about familiar.

While I was dealing with family issues she was whoring around. He held the same grin he had on his face last night, looking down at her like if he wanted to devour her, Bella was her usual feisty kitten, bickering with him, like we used to.

Was I really having a déjà vu? Only this time I was not the main character.

Would I let it happen?

Was I selfless enough to let her go?

Not yet.

Before I knew it my feet dragged me to the commotion pulling myself in front of that…nobody.

Who does he think he is?

"Edward!" I recognized Bella's voice trying to pull me back but I was already shoving him off with a glare.

"Stay away from her" I warned, I saw for the first time his clever smirk fell from his face, I was waiting for him to do something, to find the guts to hit me, please hit me! But before he could do anything Bella was in between the both of us putting a hand on my chest.

"What the hell do you think you're doing!!??" she was angry as hell, but I didn't pay much attention to it when I pulled her aside and got in his face, he shoved me off but the minute he put a hand on me I was launching myself at him.

It didn't last long I was pulled aside by a furious Emmet and a frustrated Jasper, while that dickhead stood there giving me a smirk.

"What is wrong with you dude! Pull it together!" Emmet yelled at me, my eyes were firm on him though never leaving his eyes.

"Mr. Cullen if you would be so kind to follow me" Mr. Banner had an irritated look on his face, the crowd stared in shock at what was happening, I didn't move. "Now…Edward" he snapped forcefully, I shrugged Emmet's and Jasper's hold frustrated, as I walk past through Bella not giving her a second look.

I got detention, not big of a deal, Carslile money always helped us to get through anything, so I could get into many fights but it wouldn't be enough to get a suspension.

I avoided everybody the whole day, ignoring Alice when she tried to talk to me.

Avoiding my phone filled with Esme's missed calls.

Avoiding Bella's disappointed look, just locking myself in my car and getting out.

When it was time for detention I got there earlier, not filling like meeting anyone, I was for the most part fed up with everybody's bull; Esme's, Carslile's, Alice's and Bella's.

Lucky enough when I would be done with detention nobody would be around, so I hadn't to worry about sneaking out to pass under covered, hopefully.

But luck was never on my side these days.

I sighed when I walked out of the parking lot, there was Bella sitting on my hood, her arms crossed against her chest and a worried look on her face, looking down at the floor.

I thought about going for the campus and waiting for her to get fed up and leave, but she met my gaze, biting her lower lip. I fixed at her and that's when I realized I wasn't moving.

Might as well get this over with.

My pace picked up and headed straight for my Volvo, taking the keys out of my pocket and slugging my back over my shoulder when it slipped down, when I was a couple of feet away from her she got up landing of her own two feet.

"Hey" she spoke softly I didn't stop though, simply I reached over for the handle and twisted the keys inside.

"Edward" she called for my attention taking my arm, I flinched at her touch, shrugging it off almost immediately, she widened her eyes in surprise and pain?

"I don't wanna talk" I hissed opening the door while launching my bag on the backseat of the car.

"What's going on?" I knew her voice was worried but I didn't care, I shook my head, she took my hand one more time and I jerked it off not feeling like being anywhere near her right now, I needed time to think.

"Get off" I snapped under my breath, she looked in pain, and once again I didn't care, I got inside and drove off, leaving her behind.

I had to think, I had to deal with the fact she was with somebody else.

_Interested_ in somebody else.

**Bella's POV:**

As soon as we were out of English blue-eyes thought it would be funny to mess with me a little more.

He pulled his arm around my shoulder like we were the best of buddys and grinned down at me, I stared in amusement at him.

"What are you doing!?" I shook his arms off of me ignoring the Goosebumps I felt when he touched me.

"Oh c'mon neighbor! I just wanted you to walk me to my next class" he smirked widely brushing his hand up and down his belly while stirring, I gave him a look.

"Do you own two legs?" I asked with a curious tone, he gave me a look and then smirked.

"Yes I do, but they're very tired because they have been running through your head all this time since last night! Geez…" oh my god was he serious??

Ugghh…I hated him.

"SHUT UP!!!" I screamed frustrated, he laughed.

"I will really appreciate it if you stop thinking of me, Jesus _Bella_" he snapped my name with triumphantly he at last got it, I rolled my eyes at him.

"Oh poor doll, do I worn you out that easily?" I had a smirk of my own by now, blue-eyes laughed at me completely taken a back by my suggestive answer, he smirked and advanced on me.

"I know another thing you can work out" he flirted back, I rolled my eyes and push him off but couldn't help a smile appear on my face.

And then it was fully replaced with concern. It happened so fast it barely gave me time to process the information. A pissed off Edward was standing right on blue-eyes face with a scold on his face.

"Edward!" I called.

Edward's hand met blue-eyes chest and pushed him off harshly, making him stand a few steps back, I gasped in horror but was quickly to pull myself in between them before a huge disaster could happen, that's when I noticed Edward's eyes were far away from here, there was something on them that was bothering me, they looked red but a huge void was in them.

"Stay away from her!" I heard his warning.

"What do you think you're doing!?" I tried to bring his gaze back to me, but he didn't met my worried eyes.

But I didn't last long standing there, when Edward's hands pulled me aside from my hips, strong enough to succeeded in pulling me back from the beating.

Then everything went down the hill, James hands shoved Edward off of his face who was really asking for it, but the second he put his hands up he was back on the floor by a tackling FURIOUS Edward Cullen. I gasped and hold my breath, along the whole crowd who was starring in amusement.

I watched as Emmet and Jasper pulled Edward aside, but his eyes stood still on James, not even giving me a glance of him.

Mr. Banner came in and quickly brought a reluctant Edward to his office. I gulped down and watched as blue-eyes pulled himself on his feet, covering his mouth with his hand, I could tell Edward punched him leaving him with a broken lip.

"Are you okay?" I asked as the crowd was quickly getting on their own business.

"Well my lips are a little sore, mind to help with that…?" but I was already off rolling my eyes at him, as he shouted behind me "Oh c'mon!!"

He was really something else.

I made it to History just in time when Alice was getting out of it.

"ALICE! Thank God!" finally I could get a hold of someone who could tell me what was going on with Edward.

"Hey" she gave me a weird look.

"Did you heard about Edward?" I asked, she nodded giving me a sad look.

"Emmet told me about it, I don't know whats going on…-" damn.

"I was hoping you could tell me" I sighed, looking down at the floor worriedly.

"He's been really off lately" she told me.

Was I to blame?

"You don't think …. I have…-" she cut me off immediately.

"Oh no! of course no! sure he's really depressed about it, even if he wont tell us anything…he's always pacing a lot, and I know he misses you like crazy…" she sighed and I gave her a pleading look not to tell me that, I couldn't be with Edward right now.

"Alice…" I sighed but once again she cut me off.

"But I think this has something to do with Carslile coming back" I frowned at this, as far as I knew he had left the house, Edward had told me so, we didn't got much into details but he said he was done with him and now he was coming back?

What the hell just happened?

All I knew is whenever Edward and Carslile fought there was always a certain named involved in it. _Masen._

I sighed as Alice patted my back and head to class with a low: "See you later"

History was as expected to be…hell boring. And I was not paying attention when all my mind could think about was one particular boy.

One….two…whatever.

Finally lunch was up and I sat at my usual table with Eric, Mike, Angela, Jessica, Lauren and Tyler, when I glanced at _their_ table and didn't saw him around. I got worried.

"Are you gonna eat that? Cause im starving" but blue-eyes didn't wait for me to answer as he brought the pizza to his mouth sitting down close to me.

I stared at him in amusement.

"Do you ever go away?"

"Oh c'mon I got a broken lip thanks to you I think sharing pizza seems about fair" I pushed my eyebrows together at the audacity of this dude.

"What…Wha- Do you…" I sighed when a firm sentence wouldn't come out.

Blue-eyes smirk fell from his face, and his eyes deepened under mine, like if he was trying to read me.

"Ex-boyfriend?" he asked simply, I nodded.

"He cant take 'no' for an answer uh?" I frowned my eyes at how easily he could read me, I didn't like that but I nodded back at his question.

"And he's still stalking you?" I gasped, he couldn't possible known this by just looking at me or finding Edward beating him.

"Mind reader much?" I asked a little mad he could see past through me, he nodded while crossing his arms against my chest.

"That and Lauren cant really for the life of her shut up" he mumbled under his breath glancing at her way, I laughed surprisingly when I should have been mad that everybody was paying close attention to my love life, well right there was nothing that could surprise me when I was 'laughing' ACTUALLY laughing with a pain in the ass of a neighbor.

It went well…well blue-eyes kept me company, annoying the crap out of me but it was good cause he made me laugh and well I needed some distraction after what happen with Edward and the fact that I was still ignorant of what had come over him, it worried me sick, and having blue-eyes around was for once good, that and the fact he didn't bring his guitar with him so.

"C'mon doll I'll give you a ride, AND before your dirty obscene mind of yours starts hoping for 'another' type of ride, im warning you I like to drive fast!" I rolled my eyes, he was such a cocky brat.

"Im gonna have to pass up Jar-Jar Binks, for once I own a piece of truck, for two there's something I have to do and for three I don't want to ride you" he grinned widely at this, oh my god im so stupid.

"Ride WITH you" I corrected quickly but it was too late. He laughed at me! God-damnit!

"Piss off!" I snapped irritated, he opened the car door when he shouted at me "Tell Edward I say: hi" I shut my eyes in pain. Why did I felt guilty? And what did he care?

I gave him a look and he shot the door as I walked down to the other side of the lot when his voice stopped me.

"And sugar…" he called to me I turned around giving him a look "Jar-Jar Binks? Really?" I rolled my eyes.

"Have you seen your ears?"

"Touché" he nodded at me giving me a wink.

I laughed as I made my way to the silver Volvo and sat down on his hood, eventually he'll have to come out.

The rest of the Cullen's rode with Rosalie's car, I waved them goodbye letting them know I was gonna wait for Edward when they gave me a weird look when I stood by his car.

My eyes was glued to the floor, what was wrong with me? And what did blue-eyes meant to me? And why was I waiting here for freaking Edward when I had broken up with him after he had broken my heart?

What was I doing?

Being a good friend I guess.

Are you kidding me? I cared about the guy! Of course I did!

He was my first love, I will always love Edward in some kind of way.

And as just as I thought about this I felt somebody stare at me, I looked up to find him out of the door probably considering what was I doing here?

Mmhh…that was a good question.

He stepped in, walking up to me and quickly I landed on my own two feet.

"Hey" I said softly hoping to start this good.

He didn't talk to me though, and his eyes were nowhere near mine. His actions were rough and fast, everything about him was always pretty much raw, and I just stood there and watched how he twisted the keys inside of the door and opened without saying anything to me.

Out of nowhere my hand lifted up to grab his arm and seek for any sign of attention, any sign that he was here, with me, now.

"Edward" my voice came out as a plead, hoping to all the gods above he would open up to me and let me know what was on his mind.

But this didn't happen.

He jerked his arm away from my touch, almost as it burned him, I flinched a little.

"I don't wanna talk" he spoke as he threw the bag out in the backseat.

"What's going on?" I took his hand pleading with him, once again and more roughly this time he brushed his hand away.

"Get off" he demanded in pain, I stood back little taken aback by his attitude.

He got into his car and speed away leaving me out therein the parking lot.

I cried alright? I stood in my truck for the last 2 hours crying my eyes out in the school parking lot. He didn't want to have anything to do with me.


	20. Moving on

**Author's Note: **first of all I want to thank all of you for being so awesome and continuing to review like you do :P have I told you how awesome I think you guys are?? :) hehe.

Once again sorry for the raw unbeta'd chapter :(

**IMPORTANT NOTE: **I know all of you guys are wondering when things are going to get better for EDWARD/BELLA but just be patient people, the saying goes; it has to get worse so it can get better! So please be patient with me. And besides the best always comes last.

Im grateful for all your comments on how youre devoted to the story and I REALLY HOPE I DON'T SCARE YOU OFF WITH THE JAMES/BELLA THING…and I hope you keep reading through it, be patient cause this story is indeed an EDWARD/BELLA story I promise.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

**Bella's POV:**

I didn't try to talk to Edward after that day he let me stranded on the school parking lot, and surprisingly he didn't tried to cross my way either. So we found ourselves ignoring each other the last couple of weeks, he wouldn't look once my way and I didn't bother to stick my nose up his business…

It was what I wanted, right? This was what I was looking after all.

Space, away from Edward.

So I avoided him, and he did the same. Did it surprised me? Hell yeah! Edward didn't take 'no' for an answer. So when he went out at night and didn't let anybody know where he was, or what he did, it scared me, it worried me…

I feared for what he may be up to, but it wasn't my place to say or do anything…He had made a decision out of his life, and I had made the same decision it staying put in my business.

So this is how it all went; Edward didn't talk to me, I didn't talk to Edward, Alice and I hang out frequently (not that it was something he knew about, I think) and that's how we rolled.

On the other hand there was somebody else who I did talk frequently; that blue-eyed boy; James Riley. Of course he was still an annoying prick, but he made me laugh when I sat at home whining about how I missed Edward (not that anyone knew about this) Instead blue-eyes sat beside me and used the worst pick-up lines ever to comfort me.

One thing lead to another, and we started becoming very close, it didn't help the fact we were neighbors and I know saw him 24/7 between school and home, so we hang out to do homework, study and just to watch a movie or something.

He was good company and made me smile most of the time, one thing I missed the most when I was with Edward; knowing how to smile.

I forgot how to do that when I was with him.

So I found myself hanging out a lot with Alice and James, constantly I saw Jasper too, who at first was uncomfortable with the idea of hanging out with me, and it was totally okay with me, cause I understood their position, in fact I didn't know how Alice could do it.

I didn't even know how they work this out back at home, I don't know if Edward was okay with it, and as sure as hell didn't know if he knew. I didn't dare to ask Alice either cause I was afraid of the answer, cause if he was bother by it; that meant he didn't want to do anything with me, and if he wasn't bother buy it was even worse, cause then that would mean; he didn't care about me at all.

So…Alice, Jasper, James and me…No! it was not in any circumstances called: double dates! No! We we're all friends, except Jasper and Alice who dated. That was it!

Of course I could say blue-eyes tried to take it to another level, but I was just getting out of a pretty much bad relationship and I let him know I wanted for myself…to be alone, I didn't want to be with anyone; he understood and for some time stopped picking up on me, and flirting with me which I was grateful for, but lately he's become…well…himself.

"Sugar, are you still on for tonight?" he called out making his way down to my kitchen, I stared dumbfounded at him.

"Do you ever knock?" he grinned at me.

"Would I find you in an embarrassing situation sugar?" he asked suggestively, I gave him a look.

"No" I shook my head.

"I cant say that doesn't disappoint me BUT…" I sighed, I knew this was coming "Im willing to settle"

"What do you want, blondie?" I snapped.

He jumped up on my kitchen counter and crossed his arms against his chest.

"I just wanted to know if you we're still on for tonight?" he put his best innocent smile, like if he didn't know I was going to be there.

So I decided to tease him.

"I don't know…are you going?" I asked playing dumb.

"Yes, I am" he grinned widely.

"Then I'll pass" I put a smirk of my own pouring coffee on my cup.

He simply landed on his feet with that trade mark sexy smirk on his face and give me a pat on the shoulder.

"I look forward tonight" he wriggled his eyebrows suggestively, I gave him a look; wondering what the hell was up with him "I've seen that red dress of you…" I cut him off sighing frustrated, he was such an ass.

He was almost out the door when I stopped him.

"Hey blondie!" he turned around on his heel "Do you mind waiting up for me? My truck wont start" he closed the door and made his way in the kitchen mumbling a: "Sure"

I finish putting my books inside my bag when I heard him say;

"You want me to take a look at it?" I looked up to give him a shrug.

"No, its okay. I was going to ask Jake anyways" he nodded.

"What has he been up to?"

Well yes, James and Jacob have met, they hang out and get along just fine.

"He's coming tonight I think" I took my bag and followed him outside as he opened the door for me, I rolled my eyes at him.

"You don't have to do that" and with that we drove off to school, bickering about something else than our hate for each other, we were actually bickering about the weather this time, we agreed in something…at last.

He pulled up to his usual spot, and I got out just when I did I slipped falling off my ass.

"Damnit!!" I yelped a second later blue-eyes was standing next to me laughing while pulling his hands for me to take.

"That was smooth" he laughed some more.

"Jerk" I took his hands and he pulled me up on my feet just when a silver Volvo ran past us to park across from us. Quickly I jerked his hands off of me, the whole time starring down at the familiar Volvo, of course James noticed my sudden discomfort and I thought I caught a sad glance on his eyes before he held his hang lowly down.

Edward and Alice got out of the car, both of their gazes turned towards us, but Edward only took a peak after he ducked his head inside the Volvo once again probably to catch his bag, Alice storm her way to me so I was unable to catch his face after he pulled the door closed and got out. When Alice was finally out of my way I was only met with his back facing me.

"Hey guys" she squealed excited.

"Hey" I heard James, I had to snap out of it!

"Hey Al, what's up?" I buried my hands on my jacket as we started walking down to class, this was how our days were consisted off, full awkwardness.

I shared English with Alice so we started talking about tonight, we we're supposed to go to "New Moon" for Jasper's birthday, at first I decided against it, not wanting to put myself in that situation, it would be just too awkward but Alice being herself had insisted I'd come telling me Angela and Jessica would be there too so there was nothing to worry about.

"I don't even have a fake ID" I objected.

"Oh c'mon, everybody can get in there, I can even borrow you mine" I shook my head.

"Alice"

"Nobody ever notices, they only care about you consuming" she explained, I was still reluctant to go cause I didn't want to stay stranded on the door "And if your worrying about Edward-" I cut her off.

"That's not what im worried about" I assured her, of course it would be awkward but it was time to step out and be in the same room for more than 2 hours, besides I would have to see him some time soon, it better be now when its full crowded.

Alice gave me a quizzical look, like if she knew better, but I tried to not let it bother me.

I had to deal with this on my own.

"If I don't make it in…" I began to say but she cut me off.

"We'll just leave" she said, but once again I stopped her from saying anything.

"Im not gonna let you leave when your boyfriend has a bday there!" I snapped.

"Bella! We can always bribe the guy, c'mon!" she laughed I gave her a look like she had grown a third head.

"Alice, what…"

"Oh, c'mon please! Its not the first time this has happened!"

I was not about to give some guy three hundred dollars for letting me in one night that I probably wouldn't enjoy. Hell no! I was not a Cullen I couldn't afford that, but seeing I didn't want to bump Alice, I told her a simply "we'll work it out" that for now should do. I could always just go, or look for a ride, it was no big deal.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

At lunch I got a phone call from Jacob.

"Sorry guys, I have to take this" I said while getting up and going somewhere I could listen better.

"Hey you"

"_Hey, Bella"_

"Hey, what's up?"

"_Im sorry I wont be able to make it tonight"_

I sighed, I knew he was just a boy and didn't have a fake ID but I was hoping he could give me a ride after they'd kick me out.

"What happen?"

"_Dad wants to go hiking"_ he explained.

"That's okay, Jake. Im sure we can see another time, you still have to fix my truck buddy" I teased, and he laughed.

"_Im sorry, I really wanted to hang out with you guys" _

"We'll find another time"

I said my goodbyes and hung up just in time when the bell ring, signaling me lunch was over.

Biology. Another 2 hours of whispers afraid my voice would distract Edward, it never happened, he didn't look twice my way, and just kept working on his project with Angela, when I asked her about how was Edward as a partner she told me he was great, and that he was really bright, she told me most of the time he would figure out the work so she just leave it all to him.

When I got to class Mike was already on his seat with a dissected frog on the table and a disgusting look on his face. I laughed making him look up at me with an annoyed look.

"I cant do this"

When I was making my way to sit, Edward ran past me taking his seat next to Angela who greeted him with a quick "Hello"

I played with my hands nervously as I sat pulling my hair as a curtain, blocking my face from Edward and Angele who were at the table beside me, Edward sitting exactly beside me. A small 3 steps of floor separating us.

"Ok people, before you touch your new grade of this semester I want you to fill this up for me. Thank you" Mr. Banner said passing us up a stack of papers that went from Rob Leyton to Angela finally on Edward's hand which meant I was next, I turned around to pick the papers lifting my gaze up a little with a small smile grazing my lips, but he did not face me once, he only held the papers up to me to take while he was writing down his information on his own paper scribbling rapidly.

I sighed under my breath not loud enough to hear, apparently this is how it was going to be the rest of the year, after that we could do a perfect job at not seeing each other once we were on collage.

I offered the papers to Mike who was still resisting in watching the frog on our plate.

Finally we get to work on the frog and I was as excited as Mike was. Grr…

"I just wanna say; it is not looking good" I knew that voice, I turned around to watch Edward and Angela laugh while sticking their scalps on their frog who was even worse than ours. Sigh…I missed that.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

When I was finally out of the door I found Alice stalking me.

"Bella, thank god!" I gave her a look.

"Alice what the…" I heard that velvet voice behind me call out worriedly.

"What's going on?" I gave her a look.

"Im glad I could get a hold of you" she exclaimed between loads of breath, she was having a hard time breathing and talking at the same time "Before you go, we have to…go shopping" she breathed out finally, I heard Edward groaned behind me and I laughed, turning my face around to catch him glaring at Alice.

"I thought somebody died!" he exclaimed, she rolled her eyes at him.

"Tell me about I mumbled" once again turning around just to see Edward give Alice a chuckle and walk out, leaving us behind by the lockers, I bit my lower lip at the lack of attention I was receiving, so I guess we couldn't be friends. I turned my gaze towards Alice one more time before she could let her thoughts get the best of her.

"You still there?" she pointed her head towards Edward, I gave her a look and shook my head 'no'.

"Don't go there, I just wish we…could be…at least…friends, you know?" she sighed wrapping an arm around my shoulders.

"I know" I hang my head on her shoulder letting her hold me "But…never say never!" she smiled widely, I was still not excited at all about this, she had too much faith in us, while I just mopped around.

"Anyways…before he leaves me stranded here…I'll be picking you up at 5, and we can get ready on my house and then we'll leave to New Moon, I know that piece of crap you call a truck doesn't work so I thought you could drive with us, and it will save me a worry if I can do your make-up" I sighed.

"I don't think so"

I don't know which part was more appealing, the part of going to Edward's house and dress up like a slut, (like Alice had planned for me) or drive with them down to the club, yeah that sounded about right.

"Bella, im not taking 'no' for an answer!! I need you there c'mon, Rose has been being a bitch ever since I accidently slip red wine on her white skirt, BUT C'MON IT WAS HIDEOUS! She doesn't want me near her anymore! And I cant play with Edward!!" she cried, I laughed.

"I just don't think it's a good idea Al…c'mon…Edward's gonna be there, its so awkward!" she didn't let me finish.

"C'mon Bella! Give the guy some credit, he hasn't been harassing you and he's fine with it, im telling you!!" I wriggled my eyebrows, what did that mean? He didn't care about what I did anymore?

"Besides I think Jasper's gonna drive us!" she pushed, I rolled my eyes in annoyance.

"Fine, but if I don't like what you're making me wear im not wearing it!" I warned, she gave me a wink as she ran across the hallways shouting "Edward WAIT UP!"

Sigh. What was I doing?

When I turned around I found James wrapping his arm around my shoulder, and for once I didn't bother to take it off as he walked us back to the parking lot, where thank God, there was no silver Volvo on sight.

"What you're changing your mind about tonight?" he asked turning the engine on.

"Not really, im still going, its just I worry it will be to awkward, you know?" he nodded.

"If it gets too awkward we can leave" he suggested, I turned to him, in fact that sounded good, I had finally found a way out.

"I'll be thankful forever" I gave him my best puppy look.

He laughed brushing his hands on my cheeks, wow…that felt good…what?? Okay…hold it Bella.

I frowned at him a little concerned about what this all meant.

"Its okay to me" I felt my cheeks get hotter, was I blushing? How could I have this strange feelings towards this jerk?

I had to hold it together.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

"Ill see you tonight then?" I asked opening the door before stepping in.

"Sure thing buttercake…I'll come back later" I frowned a little disappointed at what was I going to say.

"Actually, Alice is going to pick me up, we're going out for awhile" he nodded in understandment.

"Oh okay, then I'll see you later tonight I guess" I thought I saw some disappointment on his eyes too, which made me feel good. But why?

I closed the door behind me with a huge grin on my face…damn…I was falling hard for blue-eyes.

Without wanting to!

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

"Im not ever wearing that" I snapped, pulling my arms against my chest in a menacing way.

"C'mon Bella! Don't be such a prude! You want to get it on with James or not!?" my eyes widened in shock at her last statement, how dare she?

"Wha…What- Are you saying?" I snapped.

"C'mon I can smell the sex you're both irradiating from you" she laughed, I blushed like a mad woman.

"Alice, you can not be serious! THAT JERK?"

"Bella c'mon! he's hot! Its okay to be…-"

"No..! NO!"

I definitely didn't felt comfortable talking about my love affairs with my ex-boyfriend sister.

"Bella!" she laughed at my sudden embarrassment.

"NO! im not doing this with you anymore, c'mon…just hurry!" I rushed her, I was definitely mad she pulled this up.

"Okay! Fine! I just want you to know, Edward would understand.." I turned around to not meet her face, pretending to be looking for a shirt, giving her a perfect view of my back but I was intently listening what she said "I mean he already has made up an idea so…" I turned around at this…shaking my head, but Alice was going for the dressing rooms.

I didn't want Edward to think that about me, I didn't want him to create any ideas of what was happening with me and James…

I mean nothing was happening…or will happen.

Right?

Damn… I was screwed.

I was definitely falling hard, but can you blame me? After 2 years without a comforting-love relationship in my life, I could really use this fresh change, I mean James was new and funny, sexy and cute…He comforted me when I was sad, and made me laugh when I needed it, Edward just caused me even more pain, so maybe I just wanted some love in my life, some real love/comfort, somebody who would really make me feel wanted and loved.

That's it! That was only what I wanted to feel I was worth to someone, to feel loved…I just liked the idea of James cause he made me feel all those things.

But I could find those things everywhere, not only in a boyfriend, but in a friend, in a father…in a place…in my study, in my work. I didn't need a boyfriend.

I just loved the idea of him…or how he smiled at me, or how he greeted me….or how he-

Damn!

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I stepped into the house but it was pretty much empty when we got there.

"Hello?" Alice called out for any sign of life.

Not a response.

"Emmet's not here?" I asked.

"He's going with Rose" she shrugged her shoulders "So he's probably at the Hale's household, maybe she's giving him a lesson of how to dress properly and with two hands" she rolled her eyes motioning me to go upstairs, I froze when I got on the top of them, right down at the hall on the left there it was his room, many times I've come in here but this time it just felt wrong, cause I didn't come here with him or for him.

I followed Alice down to her room and got in for a shower, she went next, wrapping a towel around each other and doing our nails, this was fun…it has been so long since we hang out like this.

"Im totally doing your hair!" she called from her huge closet.

I sighed. Like I had a choice.

When our make-ups were done I began to dress, sliding in that cute electric blue dress Alice picked up for me, it had a long V cleavage that it was not too revealing, it hugged my curves tightly, and I had a problem it seemed to short like 4 fingers above my knee but it still looked pretty good on me, and I needed to look old so just for tonight it will do!

I had a problem with the black heels though, I was already clumsy as hell…adding up more obstacles for walking…like impossible shoes was not needed.

"Woow! Bella you look smocking hot!!" she clapped her hands loudly, I groaned.

"This isn't working for me Alice!" I warned her, she gave a twirl making her yellow dress twirl around with her, she looked awesome, she could wear a potato bag and she will still rock it off.

"You're a rock star!" I moaned. She laughed.

"Why thank you, I will need it tonight" she winked and I gave her a disgusted look.

"Im not interested"

Her phone rang a few times before she picked it up with a quick "Ello!?"

"Hey Jazz" she squealed excitedly.

"Yes, we're here…Bella! Yes, she's driving with us…what do you mean you're stuck with your family?" she snapped, I sighed I knew what this meant "No…JAZZ! Get out of it!" she sighed "So Rose isn't going anywhere till you both are out of there?" she turned around nervously on her steps, pacing…I knew those moves all to well…

"FINE!" she snapped throwing the phone against the wall.

"What happen?" I smiled sympathetically at her.

"Jasper's stuck with his family for dinner, he says Rose and him are going to be late" I nodded.

"Then will go with Emmet" I suggested.

"He's already out there, picking up tables and stuff" she wrapped her arms around her, I walked over to her and hugged her from behind.

"Its okay, we can go with James!" I suggested, it was a great idea!

"Or with Edward?" she suggested turning around to face me, and see how I was doing with this idea.

"I'll call James"

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Two hours I waited for him to pick up his god-damn phone! And he wouldn't! not a chance in hell! What the hell was up with that?

Alice was getting really anxious and after the movie we were watching was done I gave up.

"Lets just… go"

We went down just in time to see Edward with a bag of chips in his hand and a beer, he was fully dressed so apparently he was after all going to the club.

"Why are you still here?" Alice asked. He turned around at the sound of her voice, that's when his gaze caught mine, for a moment he stopped his actions staring at me, and only me. For the first time in along time, his gaze stayed with me for more then 5 seconds.

I smiled awkwardly, giving him a small smile.

He then turned his gaze to Alice.

"I thought you guys weren't ready, Emmet told me what happen, I was waiting for you guys" he explained calmly, putting his beer and chips down on the table while with his other hand taking a hold of his keys that were set on the big plate by the entrance.

"Are we done here?" he asked to Alice, which nodded excitedly.

"Oh wait! Damn! I forgot my purse, I'll be right up"

Now if I was clever enough or not so stupid I would have said something like; _"Oh, I forgot my wallet too…"_ or _"Ill come with you!"_ hell even a _"I'll go with you cause I don't want to be stuck here with my ex-boyfriend!" _

But no…I stood there awkwardly leaning on the stair railing, looking down at my feet, and he pretty much did the same, I knew this cause I turned my gaze lightly to watch him look down at his shoes with one hand on his hip and the other one holding the doorknob.

Oh yes…this was no awkward at all.

"So…" I brought myself to break the silence but soon my words hang loosely in the air.

"I'll go wait by the car" and then he was out.

This was definitely how it was going to be from now on.

**XXXXXXXXXXXX**

The ride was pretty much dead silent, Alice would joke around from right and left but we didn't find anything amusing about it, we just stood there silent, not daring to say anything, he would play with the stereo on and on, probably taking his attention in something else was a clever thing to do, but I fixed my gaze out, through the window while nodding occasionally when Alice said something.

Finally we got there, and they were pretty much tight with the ID's so when Edward step in they asked for his ID, he pull out his ID and handed it over, not a second later he had it back in his hand and was in.

Me and Alice just stayed on the bench waiting to see what would happen with him and when we saw he was in, I took a load of breath…I knew I could do this.

**Edward's POV:**

I spotted Emmet on our usual table with a drink in hand and he was chatting up with Ben, I nodded at the both of them giving them a hand shake.

"Where's the birthday boy?" I asked casually.

"He's not here yet" Emmet said "Where are the girls?"

"Out, they are exchanging ID's looking one for Bella" I explained and he nodded his head in understandment.

I knew they'll pass, it was easy they could easily manage to pull it off as if they were 21…specially Bella…with that low blue dress, it was like if she was doing this to me on purpose, I hated it! Every second of it.

I had managed to get out of her way, and not let temptation get the best of me, why couldn't she do the same?

Why couldn't she stay away with her ridiculous's short dresses?

I ordered a drink with Ben, paying attention at how he talked about proposing to Angela I gave him a look.

"Dude!" I shook my head, he was so whipped.

"Edward!" I turned around to see Alice with a frown on her face.

"Alice…what…?"

"They didn't let Bella in!" she whined.

I sighed.

"She wants to leave but I told her to wait up here, Im not gonna let her go!" she whined, I nodded at her while wrapping my arm around her shoulder.

"C'mon" I lead her out to the entrance stopping just before the door when I turned to her "Go stay with her" I said, when she was out I talked to the security guy, slipped two hundred dollars on his hand and then went back to my drink.

2 second later Bella and Alice were in, Alice with a grin, Bella with a frown of discomfort she knew she had a problem with me offering her things, when we're together, now that we we're not it was ten times worse.

The whole night she looked to be looking for someone, I should have guessed it was that pretty boy she was hanging out lately, probably her boyfriend. I sighed, why did I care?

But I couldn't stand to see her waiting for someone who wasn't me. I couldn't take her anymore, I had to restrain myself to scold her up on my shoulders and take her away from here.

Damn…I was losing it.

It didn't help her ass was giving me a view of how much it missed me.

Why did she have to tease me like that?

I have to get out of here.

Bella's POV:

I couldn't get a hold of James, he was nowhere to be found…luckily enough I managed to get inside the club, Alice didn't tell me how but I had a couple of ideas alright.

Blue-eyes didn't answer his phone and I was getting a little anxious. Damn him, for doing this to me!

On the other hand there was Edward who looked like he had step out of Heaven itself.

Damn! Stop that Swan!

But I didn't see much of him either, 15 minutes after we got here he was already out, and I didn't heard of him anymore.

I was glad I could get out of here now thought.

Oh damn…!

My ride! Where was my ride?

To top off my night, Alice came in crying to me, saying how she had a fight with Jasper and she wanted to go home NOW…she cried on my shoulder like forever and after awhile I told her we could go.

She didn't care to say goodbye and we just stepped out with Emmet on our tale, lucky enough he didn't bring Rosalie with him, I couldn't deal with her right now.

"Girls wait up!" he called out.

We got inside and Alice sobbed on my shoulder the whole time while I wrapped my arms around her and comforted her.

When we reached our house she pull up and looked widely at Emmet and me.

"No, Bella! Please don't leave me!" she cried hugging me.

"Alice …but!"

"PLEASE BELLA!"

I sighed while Emmet gave me an apologetic look and drove off to the Cullen's Mansion.

This was going to be a long night.

When we got there we slip inside her pj's she gave me a white short with a t-shirt of THE RAMONES, and she got in her long sleeved pink shirt and her shorts.

"What happen?" I asked but she kept sobbing uncontrollably.

I didn't understand a word she had said, but I could tell it had to do with Jasper being drunk and he'd probably say something he didn't mean.

"And then that bitch LAUREN!!" Lauren again? Was he for real?

Was something going on there?

I don't think so.

Finally after watching FRIENDS and eating ice-cream we fall asleep.

Not an hour later I was making my way downstairs to get a glass of water, I took the cup and filled it with cold water, that's when I heard a couple of steps behind me, when they neared the kitchen I turned around to meet who ever was there.

Edward.

Of course.

He seemed surprised to find me here, he gave me a look and stopped moving. Halting his actions.

I put the glass up in my hands explaining myself.

"Hey" I mumbled.

"What are you doing here?" he asked calmly taking one step closer to the fridge, his gaze hunting me.

"I was thirsty?" I tried.

He chuckled.

"No kidding"

I bit my lower lip nervously, when he opened the fridge and looked elsewhere but me.

"Jasper and Alice got into a fight" I explained, gripping the hem of my shirt, I was too nervous so I had to do something with my hands.

He nodded pouring himself a glass of water, closing the door of the fridge with his foot.

There was a long silence where the only thing I could hear was the water being poured on his glass and the gulp of him swallowing down water.

"So…how have you been?" I asked nervously.

"Im okay" I didn't miss the appreciative look he threw my way, I could sense him looking me up and down but then snapped out of it when he was definitely sure he was staring. I shifted my weight awkwardly going straight for the door to get out of here.

"So you just came in or going out?" I asked.

"Came in" he explained putting the glass down to the sink.

For some reason he didn't dare to look once again at me.

I thought for some reason this was the best time to ask him about what happen that other time in the lot.

My timing couldn't ever be perfect though.

"Edward about last time we talked-" he cut me off though.

"You don't need to do this Bella" he sighed frustrated.

"What?" I asked "Im not doing anything, I just…-"

"Don't pretend we can sit around and be friends!" he snapped a little more harshly, I looked up at him sadly. He shook his head at me.

"I don't know why it has to be like this" I slowly said getting a hold of his dark eyes on me once again.

**Edward's POV:**

It was the only way to do it, to finally push her away.

"How you wanted it to be?" I snapped "I sit around on my ass and watch how you fall for somebody else, yeah I don't think so!" I snarled harshly turning around to go.

"Edward" she exclaimed out of breath, I knew her voice was breaking but even if it caused me pain it was the only way to push her away.

"Unless you want to be some other kind of friend" I wriggled my eyebrows suggestively at her, she frowned in disappointment, this was the only way "Friends with benefits perhaps?" I suggested with a smirk.

"Don't do this, I miss you" I froze at her words, how selfish could she be? How could she put me through this once again?

The grin fell from my face replaced with a frown and a cold glare.

"You just miss a bed Bella" I snapped and then I turned around getting the hell out of there, preventing myself to walk over her and take her, she was leaving me no choice.

Well she was definitely not making this any easier for me.

I had to stay away from Bella Swan even if it was the last thing I did.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I know very slow chapter, and not much Edward/Bella but im trying to make the chapters longer so we can get Edward/Bella soon :D so hang in there!


	21. Wanted and Needed

**Author's Note:** Ok ok i know im horrible! **Im truly sorry**! This chapter took forever cause its long and my beta had to do like multiple jobs with it xD really sorry! The next chapter its done and been sent to my beta and it long too but not as much as this so hopefully it will be done quickly! Thank you for your patience and im really sorry :(

**************

**Bella's POV: **

"Where the hell have you been?" I snapped pushing at James' shoulder when Alice dropped me home.

"Sugar! You missed me!" he smiled wide.

I gave him a glare clearly showing how upset I really was and disappointed he didn't show up last night.

The smirk fell from his face, replaced by a frown.

"Sorry Bella, my mom called and I had to check . . ." there was some unease in his voice, as if he was really worried. I frowned in concern.

"Is everything alright?" I asked crossing my arms against my chest.

He stumbled a little on his words.

"Yes . . . well . . . it will be." There it was; that sexy smile he was born with. My blue-eyes was back.

I nodded.

"You called me 'Bella'," I grinned widely as if I had won the biggest award ever.

He rolled his eyes and let out a groan.

"Now, how can I ever make up for that?" he moved his eyebrows suggestively and I laughed, but didn't make a move to attack him.

"I'm warming you up," I flirted back at him.

"I know another thing you can . . ."

"SHUT UP!!!"

*****************************

The next couple of weeks became routine. Blue-eyes and I became really good friends. And since we were neighbors, we pretty much did everything together.

I helped with his mom. Did I mention that I had finally met the woman and was surprised to find out she had cancer and was really sick? Yeah, he neglected to mention that, but I guess he didn't open up to just anyone. Did I mention I was glad he shared it with me?

He also introduced me to Victoria, who was helping with his mom. I could feel they had some history together, it was pretty obvious but for some reason the girl wouldn't talk to him.

Alice and Jasper hung out with us most of the time. We watched movies together and would always pair up when we had a project to do. Of course this didn't go unnoticed by Rosalie or Emmett, who by the way sent me evil glares (Rosalie) and disappointed looks (Emmett) all the time.

It hurt, really hurt.

Not Rosalie so much, but Emmett.

Yep, they gave me the cold shoulder. As if they couldn't care less what I did with my life now days.

It was as if I never existed for them.

As if _we_ never existed. As if we hadn't been friends.

Of course, it was bad with Edward too. We bumped into each other sometimes because we had a lot of classes together. Those little instances were followed with quick 'sorry's' and uncomfortable 'hey's'.

One time Alice caught up with me in the hallway as she was about to leave.

"Alice lets go!!" Edward whined. I tried not to laugh; he just looked too damn cute.

"Oh shut up!!" she turned to her exasperating brother. "Now, Bella promise me please!"

"Alice I really need to go now, please don't make me! I have to find a ride because I just lost my ride!" I whined.

I drove every morning with James. But today he got a call from home. He told me he had to go take his mom to the hospital. I let him go after making sure he was okay and that it wasn't too serious but now I had to find a way to get back home. I was pretty sure any one of my friend's would give me a ride. But as _my_ luck would have it, Alice was the first one I ran across and I stupidly explained what had happened and that I didn't have a ride home.

"What? Come with us!" she demanded. I shook my head vehemently as she glared back with that look that always made me give in - _argh_.

"You don't mind Edward?" I turn to him and he shrugged his shoulders.

Alice grinned widely. I grabbed my school stuff and we walked straight to the car as Alice rambled non-stop climbing into the front passenger seat while I laughed and hopped into the back. Edward just scoffed.

To my surprise and awkwardness, he drove Alice home first. This meant I would be stuck in a car with him . . . alone.

I didn't move an inch from my seat in the back.

"Are you gonna hop in or not?" he asked me looking at me from the review mirror. I sighed and bit my lower lip but I moved up front to sit next too him in the passenger's side.

"You never liked the back seat," he mumbled and when I turned with wide eyes he laughed.

So I decided to tease him back.

"Maybe I just didn't like the ride."

He turned to me with shock. I pressed my lips together trying not to laugh.

I purposefully stared out of the window to distract myself from what could possibly come next, that's when he surprised the hell out of me.

"Yeah, you didn't like it _four_ times."

I stared at him with shock, a little confused.

"When was that?" I snapped. He laughed and looked at me trying to search for any sign I really didn't remember.

"After Jessica's party?"

I frowned; I was drunk everything was hazy. I remembered the night . . . but . . ._ four times_? Was I that drunk?

"I guess it wasn't anything worth remembering then," I smiled not looking at him.

He laughed louder. "You're impossible."

Suddenly we were turning the corner onto my block, and even if the conversation wasn't deep and meaningful, it felt good to talk with him about anything, even sex! Whatever! Just to have him talk to me again was worth it.

He pulled into my driveway and turn off the engine. I had a small smile on face. It was so sad to have this to end, because I knew would go back to ignoring me tomorrow.

"Well . . . thanks for the ride," I said taking my seat belt off; he nodded looking at me in appreciation.

"I guess . . . I'll see you around?" I continued. He rolled his eyes and laughed, I frowned.

"Bye," he called.

"Bye." And then he was off.

Think positive Bella. Maybe he won't completely ignore you tomorrow.

But tomorrow was the same . . . we shared classes and we didn't talk.

He was so predictable. He would never change. I can't believe I thought he would or even could.

So the days rolled on. James and I continued to be friends. Alice and Jasper loved hanging out with us and vice versa. One night, Alice invited Blue-eyes and I over for movies.

We watched_ Diamond Blood_ which never gets old, thank you very much. I mean watching Leonardo DiCaprio running with a muscle shirt? Naahh . . .

Even though I knew the whole movie and the ending, I could feel my eyes starting to prickle from unshed tears. I snuggled a little closer to James, the blanket wrapping us both, while Alice and Jasper were cuddled together on the other sofa with another blanket over them.

I watched Leo say goodbye and, as usual, I cried.

Jasper was really enjoying the movie which he had never seen before, and was staring open-mouthed at the television.

"So what? He dies?" Jasper asked mortified.

"Nooo! He's going on a vacation!" James spat sarcastically which sent all of us into a fit of laugher. Well, except for Jasper, who was genuinely horrified by the movie.

That's when the door opened and Edward walked in with his keys in his hands. He stopped and stared at the scene in living room and his eyes settled on me. I moved away from James a little, which didn't go unnoticed by either one of them, and then Edward's eyes went to Alice.

"Hey," I heard her say but my eyes were glued on him.

"Hey," he responded after awhile. "Jasper," he greeted and I could hear the tone. Jasper shifted with an uncomfortable look on his face.

"Hey man, we're just watching a movie."

"Join us!" Alice said.

I prayed to all the gods above he wouldn't. I felt like killing Alice right now.

And then Edward's eyes shifted back to me and saw how uncomfortable I was.

"I think I will," he nodded with a smooth grin.

My eyes turned back to the screen. Jasper had rewound to watch Leo say goodbye again.

"Why does he always die?" Jasper asked breaking the tension.

Edward sat on the floor by Alice and Jasper's couch.

**Edward's POV: **

Damn Alice! Not only did I have to watch 'them' everywhere at school but she had to bring 'them' home as well?

Was she _insane_?

Did she really not care for me _at all_?

And Jasper – THAT TRAITOR!

But because I knew Bella was uncomfortable being here when I was around I stayed, just because I liked to make her squirm and shudder in my presence.

But I couldn't take it anymore, his arm was wrapped around her shoulders and they were practically on top of each other wrapped up in a blanket. And I didn't know what was going on underneath.

I remember my adventures with Bella underneath a blanket.

With a crowded room or not.

Never stopped me before.

_We were watching a movie on our oversized flat screen TV in the living room. I was getting extremely bored. But Rosalie and Emmett seemed to be watching the movie in appreciation. Emmett was having more fun than Rosalie though. I watched how she brushed her hand in his hair in a loving way, she really liked the guy. _

_Big surprise there. _

_Alice and Jasper were caught up in the movie. I knew Jasper was a TV junkie so he was glued to the screen and Alice enjoyed it because he did. _

_I, on the other hand, was bored out of my mind. I didn't like chick flicks. _

_Bella was snuggled close to me wrapped up in her blanket with both her knees tucked under her chest and she was glued to the screen too. I guess Pearl Harbor never gets old. _

_But I was b-o-r-e-d. Oh and did I mention horny? Watching her biting her lower lip nervously sent my body in overdrive. _

_I put my arm around her to bring her closer. She gave me a quick look and then settled on the couch and focused back on the movie. I slipped her blanket around both of us._

_Damn Ben Affleck and Josh Hartnett . . . I wouldn't get her attention would I? _

_I had enough. _

_Slowly, I pushed my jean's zipper down under the blanket we shared. The whole time I just stared at her – she was so beautiful and sexy. I bit my lower lip and took her hand in mine; she looked at me for a second confused and gripped my hand tightly, while looking back at the screen. _

_But I had plans made for her delicate little hand. And sweetly holding hands with mine was not part of it. Oh, I wanted her to hold something alright._

_Damn, I was so horny! _

_I brought her hand to my jeans and without warning pushed it underneath my boxers. She squirmed under my pressure and looked at me, I smirked at her wiggling my eyebrows suggestively. She frowned in alarm and shook her head 'no'. _

_I never liked to be told 'no'. Especially when I was so fucking horny. _

_She was reluctant but I took her hand and gently guided it back down to my already hard and throbbing member which only grew harder under her touch. _

_I slide her hand up and down, and she just looked at me with those gorgeous brown eyes and that blush creeping up on her cheeks that I loved so much. I smiled and winked reassuring her that everything would be okay and we wouldn't get caught. _

_I brought my other arm to wrap around her shoulders while the other one helped work her hand up and down on me. _

_She squirmed but I helped her set a rhythm that felt good._

_Then I let her hand go and my free hand gripped the arm chair to so I could lie back and enjoy the sensation but I didn't have any time to because Bella pulled her hand away. I turned to glare at her but her gaze remained fixed on the movie. _

_Once again, I took her hand and brought it back to my length. _

"_Finish what you started," I whispered with a pleading look. _

_She glared at me in disbelief. I laughed and kissed her neck while she worked me. _

_I got excited, too excited. _

_I wouldn't be able to hold it or hold back plus I wanted her right then and there. _

_I took her hand away and really slowly pushed the zipper back up. I got up and took her hand but she didn't want to move. _

"_I want to see the movie," she mumbled with a frustrated sigh. _

"_C'mon," I pushed leading her to the nearest bathroom. _

I was horrible.

Really horrible.

She giggled at some comment the douche bag made. That's it, I had enough. I got up and walked away without looking back. A drive was what I needed right now.

**Bella's POV: **

Surprisingly, nothing went wrong. We watched the last of the movie and Edward's attention was on the screen the whole time, maybe we could do this, maybe the thought of hanging out with all of us together wasn't so bad for him.

For me.

Maybe we could be friends again.

Like we were once.

That was until Edward got up and walked out slamming the door behind him. We all exchanged confused looks but shrugged our shoulders and settled back to watch the credits.

Blue-eyes and I headed home after thanking and saying good-bye to Alice and Jasper. I still had some work to do and had no time to worry about Edward. He was such a child.

**Edward's POV:**

When I came back home I was glad to see the living room empty and no signs of 'unwanted' visitors anywhere.

"Edward," Alice called from behind me. I inwardly groaned, I was not in the mood to deal with anyone, especially her.

"Not now Alice," I snapped a little too harshly as I took a step for the stairs.

"No, Edward! Wait! What's going on with you? Care to explain why you stormed out like that today?" she grabbed my shoulder and spun me around. Alice stood there staring at me, hands on hips waiting for some type of explanation.

She has some nerve!

"What did you expect?" I snapped. "That I'd sit around and watch you guys have an orgy or something?" Her eyes widened at that statement. "You wanted me to be your audience? What did you really expect Alice? That I'd sit around in _my_ house in _my_ living room watching _my_ movie on _my_ TV while _my_ ex-girlfriend is WHORING AROUND WITH _MY_ SISTER?" I screamed as she took a step back.

"Stop it! I thought we could be decent to each other. Be friends at least! And she's not whoring around."

I laughed cruelly.

"Friends? FUCK THAT ALICE! You wanted me to watch Bella with someone else, watch her sit on someone else's lap, cuddle with someone else under a blanket and . . . what? Be cool with it?"

"Is this what this is all about? The fact that you're jealous!?"

"This is about how my _sister_ has the nerve to bring my _ex-girlfriend_ to my _house_ with her new _toy_! This is about how you betrayed me Alice!"

Alice didn't move, just stared at me in wide-eyed disbelief. I could see she was starting to cry.

I continued. "So what? You're hanging out with them now? And you have the BALLS TO BRING HER BACK HERE?"

I had to let it out, and I was glad I finally could.

Tears streamed down her face, but I didn't care.

"Edward, can you meet me up my office, please?" Carlisle's smooth voice broke into the room. Of course he hadn't noticed our little brother-and-sister exchange. Alice turned around and wiped her tears before Carlisle could see them.

I turned around and walked up the stairs. Though dealing with Carlisle now was not something I wanted to do I guess I would have to endure it. I was tired of being upset tonight.

I stared in amusement at Carlisle wondering what the hell was on his mind. I saw him leaning back in his chair. There was a dirty blonde-haired woman that didn't look too old sitting across from him; she looked to be in her early-40's or late-30's. It was hard to tell.

One thing I could see is that she was nervous. In fact, she seemed to be shaking. Her eyes were turned down.

"What's going on?" I asked rudely, not in the mood for Carlisle's mental games.

"Edward, sit down please," Carlisle asked in his most decent voice. I knew better. I had learned a long time ago that it was a disguise and he meant he really wanted me to follow his orders and be quiet.

"I think I'd rather stand," I'd replied coolly.

"Please Edward!" he said in a stern voice. I looked at him menacingly while I crossed my arms against my chest in defiance.

"It's okay Carlisle, really," the woman whispered. I glared at her even though I didn't know what she was doing here but I sensed it couldn't be good.

I looked back at Carlisle who was glaring right back at me. He looked pretty pissed but he took a deep breathe before speaking.

"Edward, so . . . you knew that my traveling consisted in finding your . . ."

I cut him before he could finish that sentence. We were NOT having this conversation.

"My nothing!" I spat harshly not caring if this woman heard me.

He ignored my words speaking over my raised tone.

"Well, I thought we had a hold of _him _instead it turned out to be a misunderstanding. I mean we did find . . . information but . . . well Edward, apparently he passed away awhile back. I'm sorry." Carlisle's voice had dropped to a gentle whisper.

I shifted my weight.

I did _not_ care.

_Did not!_

I didn't know him so . . .

Carlisle looked at me expectantly. He was waiting for me to say something, when I didn't he just sighed.

"There's more," he continued nervously as his gaze shifted towards the woman sitting quietly. I narrowed my eyes and sneered. I could feel a knot of rage in my stomach starting to form.

"We went to his house, searched the place and found some contact numbers and . . . pictures and other items . . . and well . . . Elizabeth," he nodded to the women. ". . . we found her address and well . . ."

I stopped him right there. This is ridiculous. Was there a point to this game of his?

To be honest, I did not have a good feeling and did not want to learn more.

"And then what Carlisle? You found a good lay? I don't see your point," I snapped harshly.

Carlisle stood up slamming his fists on the desk. The mystery woman jumped slightly and looked away.

"Edward! I will not allow you to speak like that, you know better," but I ignored him.

"What. Do. You. Want. From. Me. _What?_" I wanted to know what the hell this was about. "Why did you feel the need to bring . . . _Masen's_ . . ." I spat the name as harshly as I could, "trash back to our house?!?!"

"EDWARD!!"

"Why did bring this woman here!!??" I snapped.

At that moment, the woman rose with tears in her eyes and small smile. Carlisle and I looked at her and stopped arguing.

"Hi Edward. I'm Elizabeth. How are you?" she tried not to quiver but it was useless.

"Fine! I was just fine until _you_ showed up!!" The woman looked confused. She looked quizzically back and forth between Carlisle and I.

"Didn't you tell him, Mr. Cullen?"

"No, he didn't tell me anything! And I don't want to hear anything. What right do you have to fuck up my life!?" I snapped with every inch of hatred and anger I felt at that moment for everything wrong in my life.

I had already realized the truth of course. I didn't need words confirm she was my biological mother, I figured that out before he told me she was Masen's friend. I realized the truth the minute I stepped into his god-damn office!

"Edward, please . . . ?" she begged and tried to take a step forward but I stepped back as if burned.

"Please what? Please understand? Please forgive you? Please accept you? Please forget that you never remembered you had a son!!??" I said through gritted teeth.

"Edward!" Carlisle cried out as the woman let out a sob.

"No Ma'am! You're mistaken! If you ever had a son, you're looking for him in the wrong place!" I yelled through her sobs and Carlisle's smooth voice trying to calm me down. "PLEASE forget about me, I've already forgotten YOU!"

With those parting words, I stormed off slamming the door HARD behind me. I ran out of the house ignoring Alice's and Esme's cries for me to come back. Instead, I stormed off, jumping into my car and driving off to the only place I could ever find peace.

To the only place I never felt abandoned.

To the only place I felt safe.

To the only arms I wanted wrapped around me.

Driving towards my sanctuary, I thought about everything that had happened in Carlisle's office. He had no right to do this to me; how could he have ever thought to put me through that situation ever again! Yes, he gave me a home, family, money, he even loved me despite our disagreements. He couldn't just take away everything from me and expect me to take it lightly.

We had our problems but . . . that woman, _Elizabeth_ . . .

She had another thing coming if she thought she could just appear back into my life and expect me to call her 'mommy'.

I pulled up in front of Bella's house. I knew she would be home, probably studying for her big test tomorrow. The irony of the situation wasn't lost on me, five months ago she and I would have been enjoying countless bouts of steamy sex in every position we could muster while we 'studied.' God, I missed that, I missed HER. I missed the heat of her body over and under mine, I missed her soft moans as she came, I missed how she could make my breath erratic with just a soft touch . . .

I missed her in all ways possible, but tonight . . . just for now I missed her body intertwined with mine.

Tonight and for now, I needed release.

Tonight I couldn't drown my sorrows in alcohol; there wasn't enough Vodka or Tequila that could burn my thoughts away, so I might as well burn with her . . . in her! She was the only one who could help me.

I tried the front door to find it unlocked. I stepped inside and saw her having ice cream in her kitchen, she saw me and frowned. I remember when seeing me would make her smile. I missed her so much.

"Edward?"

I closed the door behind me and walked toward her, running a hand through my messy hair.

"What's wrong?" she asked. She could always tell when something was wrong. She put her spoon down and looked at me in concern.

"I . . . Bella . . . I can't do this . . . I . . ." I stumbled over my words that's as I took a step closer. Why couldn't I say what I felt? Because I couldn't. Because I was never very good with words, I was much better with my hands.

Expressing over explaining.

She took my hands in hers so I would stop shaking. Wait! When did I start shaking?

I drank her in! She was a vision and was glad to see she was getting ready for bed wearing only a pair of skimpy black boy shorts and a baggy pink t-shirt.

"What's going on Edward!? You're scaring me," she shook my hands so she could look into my eyes, but I was having a hard time. I licked my lips unconsciously as I pulled her a bit closer. She panicked and dropped my hands to push her palms against my shoulders. I quickly wrapped my arms around her and snuggled my face closer to her, working my way up and down her delicate throat and burying my nose in her hair taking in her scent.

"Edward," she whispered.

"I need you Bella," I whispered hotly into her ear. My mouth fell to her exposed neck – so tempting, so delicious!

My lips, teeth and tongue trailed light kisses all over her neck. Mmm - tugging, sucking and nibbling in all her sensitive places. I knew I'd leave marks. She groaned as I worked up to her jaw line, all the while she kept trying to push me away.

I kept kissing her and walked her back until she hit the kitchen counter trapping her against my body. I gently crushed her against the counter to try and prevent her from escaping me.

"Edward, no . . ." she whispered.

And just because I didn't like being told 'no' or maybe because I felt like I could; I crashed my lips onto hers. I caught her upper lip with my own pulling away breathing heavily. I was afraid I couldn't hold back after this.

Her lips were just like I remembered, sweet and soft, they looked red and slightly swollen from my kiss . . . they looked perfect. God, I've missed her so much for so long.

Her eyes were closed and she was anticipating my next move. This time I kissed her roughly not waiting for any more permission. She parted her mouth to say something as my tongue swept over her lips slowly. I seized the opportunity and ravished her, moving her lips along with my own whether she was willing or not.

This time I was too far gone to care.

I molded her body into mine and used my hands to lift her onto the counter.

She let out a loud groan exciting me further.

I wanted her, and I wanted her _now_.

I couldn't wait.

My hands gripped her hips tightly. I did not mean to be so rough but tonight I was so needy. I wanted to lose myself in Bella. She always made me feel whole.

_Flashes of that woman daring to try to come back into my life without permission went through my mind. _

I bit her bottom lip as my tongue darted in and out of her mouth exploring every inch I knew by heart but had been denied these last months. She tried to pull away breathing heavily but I didn't let her and with my hand on her neck pulled her closer to try and deepen the kisses.

"Edward, don't . . ." she muffled against me.

My other hand traveled to her shorts, thanking all the god's above that wore so little when it came to sleeping because tonight I wouldn't be able to help myself. Someone up there definitely loved me, at least a little.

My hand worked its way underneath the cotton material and pushed all the way to the flesh of her ass. I worked my hungry hand in circles trying to feel every inch of her.

_Carlisle's menacing voice telling me what to do echoed in the back of my head_

Bella was emphatic as she put a hand on my chest to try and stop me. I didn't want to stop; I leaned down so my chest was crushing against her so she was unable to move.

"Edward! Edward! Stop!" she pleaded.

I shushed her, kissing her fiercely. I knew I should pull away but I couldn't.

"You're hurting me!" she groaned turning her head away to get away from my mouth.

'_Stop Edward! Stop,' my mind screamed._

I didn't.

My body chose to stay with Bella.

My hand tried to tug down her shorts and she pushed me off, hard.

I didn't resist. What the hell was I thinking? Okay, I wasn't thinking. It hurt to think.

Breathing heavily, I leaned against the stove across from her, looking down. I couldn't look at her knowing she was probably red from my hard touch and bruising lips. So instead of meeting her eyes which were probably welling up with tears, I stared down at the floor in shame.

"Why can't you just talk to me?" her voice broke.

I remained quiet.

"Why do you always have to do this to me?" she cried. That's when I looked up and . . . it . . . stung . . . it . . . _hurt_. It hurt to watch how much I had hurt someone I love. It hurt to know I had fucked up again. Tears were falling freely down her face.

When had she started crying?

With a sob, she pushed her shirt down, I hadn't even realized I'd tried to take it off, and straightened her shorts.

"So . . . what? Are you done? Or would you like to grope me a little bit more?" she asked casually trying to calm her sobs and jumping down from the counter. I looked away. I was not only angry, bruised and rejected but I was heart-broken to see my Bella flinch in anger and pain because of me.

"God, Edward! What is wrong with you!?" she snapped. I didn't move from my spot.

Why does everything bad happen to me?

Carlisle.

Masen.

Elizabeth.

Bella.

James.

Damn! I was losing it. Losing everything. I felt out of control of my own life.

"I'm sorry" I mumbled with restrained anger.

I didn't find release after all. In fact, I felt worse.

"Huh? What was that? You're _sorry_?" she said, her words breaking in a whisper. "Geez, I have a hard time believing you," she snapped.

I turned to look at her then to how badly I'd messed up this time?

Her eyes confirmed my thoughts, there was no going back.

"Why couldn't you ever talk to me? Whether were together or NOT!" she cried putting her hands on her face. "Why couldn't you ever LET ME IN!!" she walked up to me and pummeled me with her small fists. I stood there and took every hit, I knew I deserved it.

Unconsciously I wrapped my arms around this small, beautiful creature that was breaking before me. Her legs buckled slightly and she almost fell but I caught her, taking her in my arms while she broke into a fit of uncontrollable sobs and cries.

Surprisingly she let me hold her in my arms, she let me stay close, she let me comfort her while she cried at the mess I had once again made. She was crying because of me . . . for me.

"Bella, I'm so sorry," I whispered, allowing my emotions to show. I wanted her to know that what I was feeling was genuine. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

'Oh? That's a big fat lie, Edward' cried my subconscious.

'_Shut up!' I yelled back._

I needed to be what I said to be true, I needed to believe my own words because I couldn't stand the thought of hurting Bella any more than I already had in any kind of way.

I hugged her close once again and gently tugged at chin to look at me. I tried to give her a bit of space but remained close with my arms resting lightly on each side of her body trying as close as possible, as close as she'd let me.

She put her hands in her face like she had many times before when she didn't want me to see her cry. Of course, it was a useless gesture; I've seen her cry – far too many times in fact. Not for the first time, I wondered what was wrong with me. Why did I hurt someone I loved so much?

"I'm sorry if I hurt you Bella."

She held up her hand. "You could never trust me" she whispered. This took me by surprise. "With anything, at all," she continued.

I shook my head 'no'. I saw how defeated looked, and I didn't like that. Bella was the only one that believed in me, the only one that saw me and accepted me for who I was. I did _trust_ her – with my life. Was she giving up on me?

No, not her.

I could accept it from Carlisle and my family, but not Bella.

_Not Bella. _

'_Say something Edward! Say something you fucking idiot! You're losing her.' _

That's when it hit me; she wasn't mine to lose. Not anymore.

I'd lost her along time ago.

"Bella . . ."

"No, don't say anything please," she gave me a sad smile brushing her fingers over my cheek gently.

"Wait, I'm so sorry, please forgive me. Let's just start over! Please Bella! I need you," I tried not to sound desperate, not to let my emotions show . . . I couldn't break, not in front of her. "Let's just . . . pretend this never happened! Please!" I begged taking her face with my hands carefully so she wouldn't back or flinch away, she didn't.

I laid my forehead against hers as I looked deeply into her tear-filled eyes. I tried to convey what I was feeling. For the first time in my life, I was genuinely scared.

"I'm the biggest asshole in the world, but I can't be anything, not even an asshole if you're not with me. I'm just not strong enough to go on without you, Bella please!!" I begged slightly hysterically.

I was really losing it. Losing that famous self-control, that façade that I kept over my emotions.

"Please please . . . give me another chance, please! Let's start over!"

She continued to cry silently while shaking her head 'no' and it hurt. It felt as if my heart had been pierced with a thousand knives. I was starting to not be able to feel my limbs. There was an unfamiliar coldness settling into the pit of my stomach. My throat was starting to close up.

"No" she finally said softly and quietly not looking into my eyes. The room was silent, it felt as if all of the air had been sucked out of the room.

"Bella, listen to me okay? Let's just start over! None of this has happened! HELL THE LAST YEAR HASN'T HAPPENED!" I continued nervously fearing it may be too late.

She cried letting out a sob from her parted lips.

I dropped to my knees and her eyes widened..

"I'm begging on my knees for forgiveness Bella. Please Bella."

She stared at me with sadness and disbelief.

"You're on your knees?" she asked in a small voice and I nodded with a laugh.

"I might as well try it. I plan on being here when I ask you to marry me. Only you can bring me to my knees Bella, only you," I let out a nervous laugh and she sobbed harder. She had to know that she was the only one for me and that of course I wanted to marry her. It had always and will always be her – only Bella.

Always her.

Always.

"No, we can't do this," she said. I rose up determined to let her know how in love I was with her. I didn't just love her, I was IN LOVE with Bella.

"Let's go back to the beginning? Like the very first time we met!" I was eager and desperate, waiting for reassurance but she looked down not saying anything.

"Hey, I'm Edward Cullen!" I smiled, extending my hand ready for her to accept it. To accept me.

She stared at my hand for the longest time, and slowly her eyes drifted up to my face. Then she quietly said the words that knocked the wind out of me, shocking me to my very core.

"I don't talk to strangers."

Silence.

The world stopped spinning in that instant.

_I don't talk to strangers._

I died. Right. Then. And. There.

My smile fell and I stumbled back my eyes never leaving hers. I literally couldn't breathe. I had to get out of there. What had I done?

And I turned and made my way somehow back to my car. She didn't want me.

I lost. I lost her.

Again.

I didn't know how to lose though. I couldn't, no wouldn't, accept this. What have I done?

So, I drowned my sorrows in alcohol like I should have done the first time.

**Bella's POV: **

I had wanted him tonight, I had. I'm nothing if not honest.

I had wanted his lips on my own, his chest pressing down on me urging me to follow his lead; I had wanted that – all of it. I had wanted his slightly rough touch to reach out and caress me with needy passion, and my feelings nearly got the best of me. I had misinterpreted what I thought was passion with aggression, that's why that little interlude had lasted longer than it should have.

I thought it was only a rush desire that was feeding us both.

Granted, his movements haven't always been sweet and tender, but this time there was something else behind it. When he walked into my house and grabbed me like that, I thought it was some old feelings fueling him, reminding him our time together was precious.

But no . . . again I was wrong.

It was only _his_ desire; it was only his selfishness, his need for release that wanted to claim my body tonight. It was, as usual, about him.

I saw the red eyes and bags under his eyes, fists clenched and messy hair. All the characteristics that told me something was wrong – I knew him too well. But I thought it was because he needed me. Which he did but not for the right reasons. And I was tired of being used.

I cried after he left. I couldn't believe I had said those words. It was like an out-of-body experience: I could see myself but I wasn't there. I didn't want him to leave but I didn't want the stranger in front of me either. Starting over wasn't as easy as a handshake and an introduction, why didn't Edward see that? You can't just pretend things don't happen, you can't sweep problems under a rug.

I was torn, confused and broken, and in that moment I knew it was the right thing to say.

So I cried. I cried because I missed him.

"Bella?"

In that moment, I needed a distraction.

I wanted to forget.

I cried because he wasn't **here** with _me_.

"Bella, are you okay?"

But James – my blue-eyed knight – was.

So I clung to him, I hugged him, and I kissed him.

And this was new, it was fresh, it was safe, and this I could do.

Only it wasn't what I really wanted. I wanted Edward.

**Edward's POV:**

I drove, to the cliffs, to La Push, to the beach, to the forest, to Port Angeles and then back to Forks. All the alcohol in the world couldn't erase what had happened. All the fast driving in the world wouldn't take the pain away.

I was in limbo. I was torn.

My mind screamed for me to go back and not take 'no' for an answer; it wasn't over! My mind screamed for me to get my shit together and admit what I had done was wrong, it screamed for me to crawl on my knees, if I had to, and ask, no beg, for forgiveness.

I sat on the hood of my Volvo with a beer hanging loosely from my hand . . . oh no wait . . . it had slipped onto the ground. I have no idea when that happened.

Damn.

My mind was screaming for me to go back there and make it better. Make it right.

So what was stopping me?

I could do this. I was going to do this right this time.

I sped off to her favorite flower shop praying that it was still open. I grinned in relief when I found Mrs. Coppe just closing up.

After I got down on my knees and begged the lovely Mrs. Coppe (well, I might as well get use to being in that position) to take a few minutes and sell me some flowers she gave up with a laugh.

I picked lilies, Bella's favorite, muttering a 'thank you' with a wide smile.

Hopefully this would work as I planned.

Bella was the girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, and I wasn't joking when I told her that someday I'd marry her. The truth was she could be apart from all she wanted to and for as long as she pleased, but I'd come back to her, always . . . she was_ the one_. I would never want or accept anyone else.

I parked my car on the street running up to her door with my flowers in my hand I was about to knock on the door but snuck a peek through her window to see if she was still up. The sight before me stopped me cold.

There she was; the girl I know I'll be marrying, taking off that baggy pink shirt I had tried to force off earlier. She was on her couch letting lips that weren't mine ravishing her own. Her hands were running through his hair as his tongue invaded hers. My heart clenched.

For the second time in one night, I died.

I stood a step back not really seeing anything – I literally couldn't see _anything_.

He took his shirt off and wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her closer, like I had desperately needed to do that night. But he was gentle and slow, caressing her arms. Kissing her slowly and sweetly, like she was made of delicate glass and might break.

I stood back taking my flowers with me. I knew someone else who might want them.

Alice.

Another mistake I needed to correct.

**Bella's POV: **

Edward was on my mind the whole time, his eyes, his touch, his mouth, and it just wouldn't go away.

Blue-eyes pulled me closer to his body. He was so sweet, tender and gentle. His kisses were so different from Edward's. I have to admit that he made me feel cherished. But I still couldn't do it and I pulled away because I didn't want to feel another man who was not my Edward

"I can't" I choked out.

"Bella what's wrong?" he asked as he held my face in his hands.

"I can't do this with you . . . to you," I pulled away from his touch. I felt disgusted with myself.

"Bella?"

I got up and pulled my shirt on.

"I've been using you, all this time . . . to get away from Edward," I announced, his eyes narrowed and he sighed but he didn't seemed surprise somehow.

"Bella, look . . ."

"I _used_ you James, and I was about to use you again right now for all the wrong reasons," I admitted. I waited for him to yell at me but my Blue-eyes surprised me once again.

"That's fine! USE ME! PLEASE! USE ME!" he laughed. I rolled my eyes and turned away I was not in the mood for laughter tonight, I really was hurting. Blue-eyes couldn't be like this, he couldn't be nice to me. Not after what I had done and how I had behaved. It was as bad as Edward.

"Trust me I'd be willing to . . ." he continued, I could hear the smile in his voice. This guy is unbelievable. I spun around to look at him.

"I'm sorry!" I blurted out before he could say anything else; I needed him to be mad at me this time.

He sighed dramatically and got up shrugging into his shirt.

"Baby, its fine," he promised brushing his hand on my shoulders. "I was just trying to be what you needed and what you need is a friend. You and I will always be friends, no matter what okay? So use me if you need too, I'll always be here. I trust you and appreciate your honesty and being just friends is fine with me. I've been where you are and I'll be what you need," he pulled me close, hugging me, and I let him.

What I needed was Edward Cullen.

*****

**Author's Note**: im not giving up on this story so if anyone is interested so am I :D im very sorry for not updating like before, but it takes some kind of work with the chapters :S


	22. I love You

**Author's Note: **HEY GUYS!! Im so glad you guys keep reviewing! You're awesome, thank you very much for the support!! 3 I love u! And a million thanks to **margaritama** my beta for being awesome! As always! She makes everything I write prettier! 3

Im very sorry if I wont get to update as often as I did before, school has started :( and it's a pain in the butt…:S

*******

**Bella's POV: **

After last night I was pretty much aware of what I needed to do. In fact, what I should have done ages ago but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I had been humiliated enough for one lifetime and I didn't need more of Edward's bullshit. After last night I was pretty sure he didn't want to hear from me either. I felt horrible – why I have no idea but I did. He had said he wanted to be friends, to start over – hell the man had proposed to me!

Well . . . he did practically. All he needed was a ring.

What is wrong with me? I hate feeling so torn: I love him, I hate him.

Whatever!

Edward has always confused me. I'm an emotional basket case thanks to him, and only him. I've been pretty horrible to everybody including James . . . OH DAMN! JAMES!

I gave him a horrible impression of me. No, I gave him the wrong impression. The man is HOT – with those blue eyes, I'd have to be dead to not at least fantasize about him; I'll admit that. But sleep with him? No, I never intended to do that and now I can't take it back. Of course, he seems to be okay with everything. No one should be that cool – it's not humanly possible.

I'm a really horrible person!

Well, there are only two things I can do: 1) sit, whine, complain and feel sorry for myself (and eat yet another pint or two of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia) or 2) get my shit together, do something about it and pull my life in order (and put the spoon down!).

I walked out of my door just in time to see Blue-Eyes getting into his car. He caught my eyes and gave me a shy smile and wave. I could feel my face heat up and turn about 40 different shades of red.

"Hey," I waved.

"Hi," he spoke. "Want a ride?"

Awkward silence.

"Come on Bella, we're both going the same way. You coming?"

I sighed. "I didn't want it to be like this," motioning with my hand between the two of us. I really wanted his friendship back, like it was before; careless and tension-free.

"It's alright Bella . . ." Blue-Eyes started.

"No, its not!" I stressed cutting him off. "It's weird, and it's awkward and it's all my fault" I admitted shamefaced.

"I'm sorry," I blurted out covering my face with my hands; he sighed running a hand through his hair.

"I probably should go," Blue-Eyes muttered quietly.

What? Well that was a surprise. _I KNEW it_. It wasn't humanly possible for him to be THAT cool with what had happened. Okay, I officially feel even worse than before.

"I'll catch up with you . . . I guess . . ." I mumbled those the last words to myself as I watched him speed off.

There was hell to pay.

I had screwed up big time.

I climbed inside my truck and after gathering my stuff together I sped off to school as fast as my truck would let me. I blasted the radio, letting the music take over so I wouldn't have to think about the mess my life was right now.

Have I mentioned how fantastic my luck is lately? Well, as I'm pulling into the parking lot, I see Alice chatting with Edward who was getting out of his Volvo. They didn't see me and I knew I had to talk to him. They were making their way to the building, but I was quick and rolled down the window shouting out a loud: "EDWARD! WAIT!"

Both turned their heads and nodding at me. I parked my truck and ran to catch up with them without tripping or falling. Hey, maybe my day wasn't going to be so bad after all.

I stopped in front of Edward and just stared into his green eyes. He looked back at me in confusion waiting for me to say something. Alice was just standing there obviously feeling out of place.

"Ooookaaaay then . . .I guess I'll see you guys later. Bye!," she said all too quickly walking away before either of us could say anything.

"What's up?" he asked casually pushing his hands into his jean jacket.

"I wanted to apologize. I'm sorry about what happen last night," I said quickly.

"Bella look . . ." he started but I cut him off.

"I can't just kick you out of my life. I can't not have you in my life," I blurted out sincerely.

He stared at me for the longest time frowning and looking sad. Okay, an odd reaction and not expected. I was actually hoping for a more positive response. Relief? Joy? Happiness? Maybe a sheepish grin? Anything?

How could he not know that I wasn't over him? That I probably never would be?

He needed to know that.

He didn't say anything.

Nothing. Nada. Nietz.

So I went on, because I couldn't the silence was deafening and much too painful.

"I didn't mean anything I said. I was just so hurt from everything that has happened and reacted really badly. I wish last night hadn't happened. I just need you to know if you need me I'm here for you," I smiled nervously.

"Bella . . ." his said seriously, too seriously. Afraid of rejection, I just continued.

"No. It's okay. Whatever. Maybe we can be friends . . ."

"Okay," he said quietly. I was dumbfounded and pretty sure my mouth was on the floor.

"Wait . . . what . . .?"

"I said, its fine with me," he looked into my eyes then and I was pretty sure I could detect a hint of sadness. I knew him.

"Okay then. Good. Friends – no, that's . . . that's . . . _good_," I smiled awkwardly.

He nodded.

"Okay so, how you've been?" Brilliant Bella – BRILLIANT!

Could I have sounded lamer? What was to say after everything we've been through?

"Uh, I have to get to class," he answered with a sigh. I could tell this was as hard on him as on me.

"Oh sure, can I walk with you?" I asked, he nodded and we strolled side by side in quiet silence. Of course, this being high school, we started to get a few looks our way. Okay, more than a few looks – LOTS of looks along with whispering. Seriously, did people not have lives? Could this be more uncomfortable?

"So . . . Alice wanted to see this movie tonight . . ." I started, he nodded and cut me off gently.

"This is my stop."

"Oh, sure. Of course. Okay then, I'll see you later?" I asked.

"Bio."

I turned away feeling completely stupid. I tried to sneak a look over my shoulder but he was already gone.

Could I be more delusional?

What made me think this could actually work?

English and the end of the day couldn't come soon enough.

**Edward's POV: **

Ok, Bella wanted to start over. Fine with me. She wanted to be friends? Fine, yeah, I could do friends. She wanted share the details of her night with James? Fi . . . yeah I don't know about that.

Just the though of that definitely struck a nerve . . . and my heart too.

When I saw her walking towards me, I was ready to dismiss her with a rude comment or another humiliating remark. But then she was standing there telling me how much she was sorry, how she didn't mean it, how she wished it hadn't happened, how she wanted to be there for _me_. I just couldn't say 'no'.

The truth is that I'd rather have Bella in my life any way I could take her, then not having a Bella at all. Even if she was sleeping with that idiot neighbor. I'd rather have her near me knowing she's with someone else then not having her at all.

I love her just the way she is and I accept her for what she is and who she's involved with . . . yes, I love her. I love her more than I love myself. I love her enough to let her be happy with whoever makes her happy – even if it's not me, no matter how much I wish it was.

Yes, I, Edward _"selfish, demanding, jealous"_ Cullen was sharing. I was letting go the one thing . . . no, the one person . . . I didn't want ever want to share or lose. The one person I'd never wanted other men to look at or even breathe the same air.

I was a mess.

I was also pissed. I felt like she was being such a bitch. How could she come to me after being with _him_? Was that easy for her? Could I do that?

Could I move on like she had?

Probably not. I know it was not so easy for me to let her go as it was for her to let me go.

English and the end of the day couldn't come soon enough.

*********************************

I swear someone really hates me! No, despises me! Guess who is my project partner in English? One guess. Yes, none other than Isabella _"she's sleeping with her idiot neighbor and is slowly killing Edward Cullen"_ Swan. Our professor paired us up for stupid literature poetry project. This just not fair! Of all the people in class, why did I have to be paired up with her?

Kismet. Karma. Payback. Torture.

When I heard our names, I took a deep breath and stood up turning to look at her. When my eyes met her I found she was staring at me with a smile. I did not return her smile.

I simply gave her a nod and looked over at the assignment on the board.

I'll knew I'd have to deal with her later but I just couldn't now.

Is it hot in this room or is it me?

After the bell rang, I sprinted up from my seat and out of the room as quickly as humanly possible. I had never wished for vampire speed more than I did at that very moment.

"Edward" Bella called. I stopped and spun around. She had made her way around the crowd and was standing behind me. Since when was so fast?

"Hey," I ran a hand through my messy bronze locks.

"Hey, what are the chances right?" she said awkwardly.

Well, she wanted to be friends right? I guess she hadn't really thought that one through and neither had I. I know I'd said that we could but it was so HARD. I couldn't bring myself to talk to her so how could I be her friend? I wanted to scream at her about what I had seen last night but I just couldn't. And I also couldn't bring myself to say anything nice when all I could think about was how _his_ hands were **all over her body**.

"Right . . ."

"So your place or . . . mine?" she asked.

I relaxed a bit and grinned winked at her suggestively. It must have enough to relieve some of the tension because she laughed.

"I guess we can manage anywhere. We always could," I smirked, she punched me lightly on the shoulder and kept laughing.

"I'm serious! Stop!"

"Okay. Um, how about my place, after class?"

She nodded in agreement, "That's fine with me."

"You'll drive back with us?" I asked.

"I drove my truck today." Right she had! That's why I hadn't seen her with the idiot. Hmm, what was that all about? Did get awkward after the "magic"'? Better yet, maybe he sucked.

I grinned at the thought of that.

Yes, that must be it, because Bella was never a bad lay.

Never.

She always thought as herself of shy and timid, and not out going at all, but she was a fire ball.

"Okay then," I said.

"You're coming to the cafeteria?" she asked all of the sudden.

"Uhmm . . . no I think I'm going to pass."

She nodded while playing with her hands nervously, something was on her mind. I knew she thought I was avoiding her. Not good. Diversion Edward, think of something. Quick!

"Hey, you want to join me? I know some place not far from here where they have the best cheeseburgers ever," I offered, she smiled up at me. YES – she smiled at me. She watched me starting to walk away backwards and slowly. I was waiting, hoping, praying for her to catch up, and after a minute she did.

I smile and she graced me one that big bright smile of hers. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.

I wrapped an arm around her shoulder and she squeezed my hand like old times. It felt good.

Yes, maybe I _could_ do this 'friends' thing.

**Bella's POV: **

"Shut up, she was totally hitting on you," I rolled my eyes while he laughed.

"And so what if she was?" he leaned over the table, his chin on his hands eyeing me with an intense stare.

What if she was?

"I might have a problem with it," I smirked, trying to flirt with him. The truth was I had a huge problem with it, of course!

He looked at me in surprise. I leaned back and shrugged my shoulders looking away.

"Hmmm."

Well, what did that mean?

"Come on, we should get going," he said abruptly. What was I doing? What right did I have to care if other girls threw themselves at him? We were friends right?

He got up and I followed. I was glad he'd dropped the whole conversation.

"She did had a nice ass though."

_Friends Bella. You're just friends._

**Edward's POV: **

It wasn't fair! She wasn't being fair!

It didn't help that every time I looked at her I wanted to throw her up against a wall, on a table, on the floor . . . hell, any hard surface would do.

After school, she showed up at my house like we'd planned. I was in my bedroom and Alice knocked on my door letting me know Bella had arrived. I got up to head downstairs but a second later she was inside my room.

"Hi, do I really need an invitation to come into your room?" she asked grinning. I smiled and pulled a clean t-shirt on.

"So where are we doing this?" I looked at her and grinned widely.

"Stop it," she warned in a teasing tone. Her eyes were roving around my room, and landed on something lying on my desk. A letter. The letter from that woman . . . Elizabeth. She had written it after I'd stormed out and I couldn't bring myself to read it after I'd gotten home. I still couldn't

Instead, it sat on my desk the whole night. I had noticed it when I first walked it because it stood out. I knew where everything was and this piece of paper hadn't been there when I left. When I realized who it was from, I didn't want anything to do with it. Nothing good could come from her. So, it sat there and I hadn't given it a second thought. Apparently, it caught Bella's interest. She was staring at it in confusion and curiosity.

"Let's just go down stairs," I said too quickly and more harshly that I intended. But I didn't care. Bella didn't know the whole story and I wasn't in any mood to answer questions about that letter or that woman.

If Bella was hiding her relationship with that idiot, why couldn't I hide something of my own?

"Ok," she said, a little taken aback by my tone of voice.

Once down stairs we managed to stay focus on the work, and not carry on with little flirtations and innuendos. Surprisingly, I even held my tongue when we came across a certain part of the book that talked about 'cheating.'

Ok so _technically_ Bella hadn't cheated. _Technically_, she was free to do as she pleased but it didn't mean I had to like it or be nice about it. Why would she get together with the idiot the same night I told her I wanted to start over fresh with her? Of course, I was conveniently forgetting why I went over to her house in the first place and that I had invited myself. She could have been expecting him later.

Wait what if that wasn't the first night . . .

Stop it Edward! This is stupid.

I leaned back just watching her read.

Could she be any sexier?

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked all the sudden.

"I was trying to figure out your sexiest face actually," I confessed. She furrowed her eyebrows confused and her mouth tightened.

Okay so maybe I shouldn't have been quite that honest. Obviously, my brain had left the room because I just kept going.

"Show me," I dared

"What?" she snapped.

"Do it, right now."

"Shut up Edward!" she said grinning and rolling her eyes.

Then in the span of a breath everything changed. The front door slammed open with a furious Carlisle storming inside, I looked up and when he caught the sight of me he made his way over to where Bella and I were sitting. I didn't make a move.

What the hell is was wrong with him?

"You ungrateful son-of-a-bitch!" he snapped. I stared at him in shock - was he drunk?

He obviously didn't care that Bella was in the room. He continued on his rant.

"How dare you to treat her the way you did? You know better – we have taught you better," he snapped. I laughed because I couldn't believe Carlisle. I'm pretty sure I had one or two reasons that explained my behavior towards that woman.

I think the laughter did it for Carlisle because the next thing I knew he had lunged towards me. But Bella shot up and put herself between the two of us.

"Nooo!" she screamed. Carlisle took a deep breath and pulled back while I got up. I tried to push Bella off to the side but she budge. She stood her ground with a warning glare at me to control myself. Not likely in this situation.

"What did she expect from me? To hug her and tell her how much I'd missed her?" I snorted.

"She's still crying her eyes out Edward; she even considered the possibility of killing herself! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT . . ."

I cut him off.

"Bullshit! She just wants sympathy, she wouldn't . . ."

"You either go and have a civil conversation with her or, so help me, I will . . ."

"WHAT? What Carlisle? What will you do? Kick me out? DONE! Don't bother, consider me gone!" I had enough of his bullshit.

"Edward!" Bella called out behind me but I was already running up to my room. I started pulling out my clothes, DVDs, books, anything and shoving it into a duffle bag. I could hear the commotion down stairs as my 'family' was trying to figure out how to deal with the situation. I didn't care anymore, I just wanted out of this house. Out of my life!

That was before Bella walked into my room. I had just finished zipping up my bag.

"No, Bella get out of my way!" I said trying to walk around her.

"NO! You're not thinking this through Edward! Where are you going?" she pleaded at me. She couldn't stand watching me throw everything away. To watch me walk away from a family that loved me and had always stood by me. Which is why I felt so betrayed by Carlisle right now.

"I thought I had a standing reservation on your couch?" I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively with a grin, but she ignored me.

"You're not going anywhere! What does it take for you to open up and talk?" she said softly.

The world started to go black as I watched her walk over to my desk and pick up the letter. She started to open it. Oh god, she was going to read it.

"Stop that!" I warned. She looked at me.

"Why can't you let anyone of us in? I was with you for two years and you never let me in," she sighed. No, that's not true. Bella was wrong. Bella was everything to me. I _had_ let her in, she was closer to me than anyone else.

"Why do I have to deal with a woman who never gave a fuck about me?"

"Edward, I understand how you feel. I do. But is it so bad to at least talk to her? Hear what she has to say? Consider giving her a chance? I'm not saying that she's right and that you don't have a right to be angry but maybe there's a reason. It's more for you than for her Edward."

More for me than for her? Isn't that ironic.

"I'll come with you" Bella said suddenly, stepping closer to me.

What did she just say? Did I hear her correctly? I just stared at her intently waiting for her to say something else.

"Edward, we'll get through this together, okay?" she promised taking my hand, leading me out of my room to someplace unknown.

And I followed, not looking back and not thinking of what good or bad would come of this. For the first time I could remember, I actually shut up and followed her.

As I drove, Bella read the letter to me. As I expected, it was an apology and explanation of how and why she left me as a child. She was just 17 years old and scared. Her father had kicked her out when she'd confessed she was pregnant and she couldn't take care of herself. Masen, of course, hadn't given a shit either. She had to take a job as a waitress in order to make ends meet and moved into a hell hole of an apartment. She didn't see how she was going to take care of a baby and realized that 'this was not the life I wanted for you'. Original. The letter didn't say much after that. I guess what was left to say?

Bella sit by my side giving me directions while I drove to a house a little over two hours away from Forks. As we pulled into the driveway, I realized that apparently she didn't leave in a hell hole anymore. The town we drove through was nice and the house was nice too. Bella took my hand when we got out of the car and I held my breath as she knocked. We were greeted by that woman's . . . Elizabeth's . . . daughter, Erica. She was from her second marriage – she mentioned that in the letter. Yeah, I had a little sister apparently.

Bella held my hand the whole time. While we walked in, while we sat on the couch, while Erica talked – she didn't let go of my hand the entire time. Erica stared at us with happily. She was so excited to know she had a brother – a big brother. I got a bit annoyed; I didn't feel comfortable with Elizabeth calling me 'son'. I didn't even know if I wanted to be part of her family. It was just too much too soon.

It was too much to handle but still Bella held my hand.

Elizabeth had a husband named Brad who looked like a nice guy. He took care of his family. Overall, they were nice and excited about meeting me. Overall, I was overwhelmed and needed a break.

Bella, of course, saw how I was feeling. And thank God for her. She could read my mind so easily.

"Well, we really should be going, it's getting late and it's a long drive back. Thank you so much for inviting us into your home. It was lovely meeting you Elizabeth, Brad and Erica," Bella said politely.

I stood up, nodded and mumbled a 'thanks'.

"You can come over any time Edward," Elizabeth told me gently, I smiled politely.

Erica jumped up and hugged me tightly and then squeezed Bella, "Come back soon please!"

"We will," Bella laughed and promised, I groaned inwardly and managed to keep smiling.

For some reason I didn't want them to sense my discomfort, I . . . liked . . . these people.

On the drive back, we didn't speak. I drove Bella home and hopped out of the car to walk her to her door. Suddenly it was thrown open by a furious Charlie.

"Bella, its midnight! On a school day!"

I stood there, hands in pockets not saying anything. I didn't really didn't want to be rude by making a snide comment or snapping at him with a quick retort, even if it was in my very first instinct. I had to remember that this was Bella's dad.

"I'm sorry dad, we lost track of time," she said sweetly.

I looked up find hard eyes glaring at me. I waved with a slight grin.

"Hey Charlie."

"What is _he_ doing here!?"

"Dad don't!"

"It's okay Bella!" I told her. "I need to get home . . ."

"Stay away from her . . ."

"DAD!"

"I was just making sure she came home safely" I explained as softly as possible. Charlie nodded giving me a stern look. I turned back to Bella.

"And now I guess I owe you a ride home tomorrow morning considering your truck is still sitting in my driveway," I grinned sheepishly at Bella. I could feel my insides tingling and my stomach churning in excitement. I couldn' wait to see her again but I was also dreading it a tiny bit.

"Don't push your luck boy," Charlie warned, I laughed and shook my head.

"I'm not trying anything sir," I promised. "I'm simply taking her home," he didn't say anything else which I took as a good sign that he trusted me on my word.

Good.

"Go dad," I could tell Bella was going to continue the discussion with her dad later. He grunted but finally turned and walked inside shutting the door behind him. Bella turned to me with an embarrassed smile.

"I'm so sorry about that."

"Don't worry about it," I shrugged. "To be honest, I kinda deserved it," I said truthfully, I've been nothing but an ass to him, and her for that matter.

She took a step closer to me and hugged me. This was goodnight.

"I'm very sorry about everything that happened today," she said hugging me tightly.

"Thank you for coming with me," I whispered, not ready to let go of her when all too soon she pulled away.

"Always" she smiled and then waved goodbye while walking in.

**Bella's POV: **

The last couple of weeks have been A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!

Edward has been nothing but great, of course he would always stick in one or two comments that would completely annoy me but we were very good friends. He also opened up to me like never before; we've even visited Elizabeth and her family quite a few times. Of course, he was always uncomfortable but I knew it would take time for him to be at ease and with my help, he will.

We worked on the project most of the time we were together and we're comfortable enough to keep the little flirtatious game between us going. It was just a fun and careless game, nobody got hurt.

And here we were again at my house – doing everything but working on the actual project we're supposed to be doing. There was a storm outside with thunder, lightening and high winds. Edward was stuck here a while.

"Edward focus please!"

"Have you or have you not? It's a simple question!" he asked twirling his pencil between his fingers watching me intently. I rolled my eyes at him, couldn't he just drop it? He was flirting outrageously with me – I could tell he was horny.

"No, okay? I have never cheated on a test, I've never needed too," I finally said hoping he would let it go. He laughed.

"Except when I started dating you," I snapped under my breath and he stopped laughing.

Suddenly there was a loud clap of thunder that made me nearly jump out of my skin. This was a good opportunity to change the subject before he could get upset by my last statement.

"Is this storm every going to pass?" I sighed, and looked at Edward. He was glaring at me.

Ouch . . . hit a soft spot with my little 'confession'.

"What?" I asked innocently.

"Keep doing your homework," he growled and I laughed it off.

"It would be nice if you gave me some help Edward."

He simply rolled his eyes and go up to turn on the T.V. Just as it came on, the lights went out.

"Hey, what the fuck . . .?" Edward jumped.

A black out! Grrrreeeaaat! Just what I needed with Edward _'horny-as-hell'_ Cullen.

"Great!"

"This is fuuuuun Bella."

I could hear his teasing tone and laughed, "Keep it in your pants Cullen."

"I have a hard time when you're looking like that."

"You can't even see me," I laughed at my own stupid joke, he groaned which only made me laugh even harder.

"Shut up Bella."

I got up to find some candles. I could feel Edward follow me and sense him right behind me. He 'bumped' into me and made sure his hand fell on my ass.

"Edward," I warned.

"I'm sorry I thought that was the . . ."

"Yeah right, keep your hands to yourself."

After lit some candles, I sat on the couch with work now completely forgotten. Edward walked around the house to make sure all the windows were closed.

"It doesn't look like it's gonna stop any time soon," he said looking out of a window and then coming to sit beside me.

"What should we do?" I asked, wrapping a blanket around me with the storm outside raging.

"I can think of one or two things," he face was so close to mine I could smell his breath and didn't pull away. I didn't want too, I felt comfortable being this close to him.

"Really?" I teased watching his lips curve into a smirk.

"Really," he teased watching my lips. "And both of them include you – gorgeously naked," he said huskily as he inched closer to me. I tightened my hold on the blanket. I really should put a stop to this but I didn't want too. I wanted Edward to just kiss me before I kissed him.

"Right here right now?" I asked seductively.

"Right here right now. I wouldn't wait to make it upstairs," he stared at me hungrily. Suddenly, his eye darkened "But I wouldn't take you on this coach where another man already had you," and then he pulled away. I felt like I had been slapped.

What did he just say? What the hell was going on?

The storm outside was raging even crazier – as crazy as this man was making me.

"Edward, what the fuck are you . . ."

"I was not STALKING okay!" he said nervously. "I just came back that night, you know, after we . . . talked . . . anyway, I found you a little TOO comfortable with that idiot next door," he explained throwing his hands on the air. I shook my head not believing what I was hearing. Did Edward assume we just threw ourselves on the couch an went at it?

OH HELL NO! I'd had enough of his accusations and assumptions.

"NOTHING HAPPENED!" I snapped getting up.

"Bella, it's alright, you don't have to explain anything to me. It's none of my business right? I'm just telling you I don't feel comfortable doing it on the couch."

That's when I lost it.

"NO! You can't just say that to me! Okay? NOTHING HAPPENED! On the couch or anywhere else? "

"Bella . . ." he continued calmly. This understanding Edward was really starting to piss me off!

"NO! Stop it Edward. You don't know anything. I stopped the minute I realized it's only you that I want!" I was really annoyed that he kept going on and on about the damn couch.

He sighed getting up.

"I didn't sleep with him, I couldn't" I could feel the tears forming, he had to believe me. He _had_ to.

"You didn't sleep with him? Really? You swear?"

"EDWARD! I DIDN'T! . . . I swear," I step in front of him and stared into those beautiful green eyes looking at me.

And then he did something that surprised me, he grabbed my face with his hands and captured my lips with his. It was a soft and sweet kiss. My lips moved with his and parted to deepen it further.

Then he pulled away.

"Its okay if you did you know, just don't lie to me . . ."

"I DIDN'T DAMNIT!" I pushed him off really annoyed, couldn't he drop it?

"Okay fine, no need to get all crazy," he sighted. I just walked away from him really upset; he got on my last nerve with that comment.

"Get out," I mumbled.

"Bella, there's a storm outside."

"Hopefully, you'll be struck by lightening!" I snapped opening the door for him to get out. Way to ruin the mood, seriously!

"Bella, c'mon!" he laughed.

"OUT!"

He walked over to the door and closed it.

"What the f . . ." but then his lips were on mine and swallowed whatever I was going to say.

"I hate . . ." _kiss_ " . . .you . . ." _lick_ ". . . jerk . . ." _suck_.

His lips took over mine and before I knew it, I was wrapping my legs around him. His large hands grasped my bottom and I groaned into his mouth.

"Asshole," I moaned, breathing as heavily as him.

"Bitch," he hissed, pulling me onto the couch finally devouring me like I wanted him to do for the past few months.

His hands travelled to my top and pulled it off.

"Too many clothes," he mumbled, I nodded definitely agreeing with him as I took off his shirt.

"Impatient love?"

My smile was met by his smirk which was soon covered by my lips on him.

His hands held me by my waist as I unzipped his jeans. He groaned when my hand made contact with his arousal throwing his head back at the sensation.

His lips soon found my neck, nibbling and sucking and probably leaving a mark. Just as I pushed his pants off, he worked my shorts and panties off. I straddled him quickly hating the lose of contact with his skin.

"God I missed you" he growled. I kissed him letting every bit of passion seep through, every minute I had lost with him was being found with this kiss.

"If you ever hurt me again I'll hit you so hard," I warned licking his neck.

"Fine, fine – let's do this now, I'm so hard now!" he snarled sexily, gripping my hips waiting for me. I teased him by grinding into him.

"Bella!"

I moved my lips down to his collarbone onto his chest, then all the way up to his jaw back to his lips.

"I swear I will do it for you" he whispered hotly.

"Impatient love?" I chuckled.

He took control and moved my body back and forth on his hips, I groaned in pleasure. He continued to play with me as I felt his fingers toying with my center.

"Don't . . ." I gasped as he pushed two fingers inside of me and started thrusting them in and out at a fast pace. Damn he was good at this.

His fingers went deeper and faster.

"Edw . . . a . . . aaah!" I shuddered. He grinned as I leaned my forehead against his for balance, my hips moving along with his fingers and that's when he slowed down.

"Ah, no naughty Bella, no cheating," he whispered.

"Edward!" I warned, he smiled and pulled his fingers out gently.

"You can't behave so . . ."

Two could play that game, I thought as I grinned and licked his lips with my tongue, going lower to his chest and laying hot kisses everywhere until I reached his spectacular abs. I slowly brushed my tongue in little swirls travelling lower to his very hard, long manhood.

"Bella, please . . ." he put his hand on my hair.

I kissed the tip, teasing him. He groaned in pleasure and when he least expected it; I took him in my mouth sucking him like he wanted me to. I moved back and forth, up and down alternating between slow and fast, sucking and licking.

"Faster," he pleaded but I went slower.

"Bbbb . . . ell . . . aaah," he grabbed my hair initiating a steady and faster pace and just when he began to twitch inside my mouth I pulled away.

"I'm sorry love, but not cheating," I smiled as he glared at me with a darkened lust-filled gaze.

He hauled me back on his lap with a snarl.

"Now, where were we?" he whispered hotly, he put my legs around his body and thrust into me hard and deep. We both gasped in pleasure. It felt so good. It had been too long.

He was so big, thick and hot, I could feel him everywhere.

"Soooo tight," he moaned pulling me closer.

He went slow at first but then we both couldn't hold back any longer. He quickened pace as he as he guided my hips back and forth, up and down on his body. This was so worth the wait.

Every thrust was filled with reckless passion and, even love. There were several rounds on the couch. Thank god Charlie was working the night shift and wouldn't be home until morning. The first time was heavenly ecstasy, filled with nothing but love. The next rounds were pure bouts of passion and lust. They were rough, hard and wild, the way we both enjoyed.

"Faster," he growled at one point when I wasn't moving too fast enough for him, he got tired and rolled over so I was on my back so he could take over and go as fast as he wanted, I grinned.

"Ass," he smirked and gave me a peck.

The last time we both came together in a mix of sweat and kisses. He collapsed on top of me making us both lose balance and he fell over bringing me along with him. I laughed when he groaned, pulling the blanket over us.

"I love you," he whispered gently pushing the hair out of my face; I smiled and kissed his chest.

"I love you more."

"Not possible," he smiled brushing his hand on my cheek.

"Charlie's gonna kick your ass if he finds us like this," I stated trying not to laugh.

"Bring it on, I'm not moving," he dared.

"Up, let's go," I tried to get up but he held me tightly to his chest.

"No, stay here."

"Edward! Please, I have to shower," I said while getting up and pulling the blanket over my body. He tried to tug it back.

"Stop," I laughed succeeding in taking it and walking up the stairs. He followed soon.

Edward never left that night and I couldn't have been happier. He held me all night; kissing me, brushing my hair gently, telling me how much he loved and missed me. I was so happy. But I kept wondering what would happen in the morning. There will be a** lot** of _explaining_ to do, on **both** parts. What happens when the real world comes crashing down on us? Could we survive? I hope so. Because now that I had him back, I didn't think I could let go.

******

I know it's a little bit rush but theres still some explaining to do with those two before they can get all frisky and mushy xD


	23. Searching for change

**Edward's POV: **

I woke up only find I was left alone in bed. I groaned; this was not what I expected.

I shifted to look around only to find that I was indeed alone. No sign of Bella or a pissed Charlie anywhere.

Being alone isn't so bad if that's the case.

I got up slipping on my jeans, not bothering with a shirt. I tiptoed in the hallway only to see that Bella was not in the bathroom either. I washed up as quickly and as quietly as I could.

Ugh . . . I needed to find Bella

Seriously not wanting to reacquaint myself with Chief just yet, I first listened outside his door to make sure he wasn't home. Silence. I tried the door and peeked in. Empty. I dashed back to Bella's room and snuck a look out of her window. No cruiser.

I grinned.

Having a completely house empty with only Bella had its advantages.

I leapt down the stairs, finding my gorgeous, fresh-faced vixen in the kitchen with her phone in hand. She was pacing while cooking breakfast.

Sweet!

"No dad, its okay . . ." she said while turning to find me grinning and stalking towards her. "I got it . . . everything's fine here . . ." she smirked eyeing me up and down. I leaned in inches away from her face making her stand back and clasp her hand over her mouth preventing a giggle. "Trees have yet to fall on my head," she promised trying to reassure Charlie after the non-stop storm hit last night.

I think Bella meant the actual storm. I was thinking us.

I loved seeing her squirm. I had backed her up to the counter playfully. This was my moment!

Resting my arms on each side of her body, I trapped her with my body. I leaned down for a kiss only to have her twist her head in order to continue talking to Charlie.

Play time.

". . . Yes, I worked on my project . . ." she said as my lips that landed on hers.

Between trying to avoid me, being caged by my arms and taking to Charlie, Bella was leaning back resting on her elbows nearly lying on the counter. She had no way out. Yummy – what a delicious breakfast.

I kissed her neck gently. She yelped, I smiled. Nuzzling into the crook, I bit down gently then licked and peppered more kisses down to her shoulder working my way down the front of her neck.

"Most of the time," she went on with her conversation and I just chuckled lightly.

Oh, we worked on a project alright.

I continued with tiny, butterfly kisses everywhere on her face, cheeks, nose, her lips, ears, neck and collarbone. She giggled.

"Um, Dad . . . I gotta go . . ." she bit her lip trying not to laugh. I grinned down at her.

"I love you too, bye," she said quickly while hanging up and throwing her arms around my neck.

"Hey you," she whispered huskily in her sexiest voice possible.

"Hi," I returned the same whisper while lowering my lips to hers.

The kiss was slow and languid, gentle but hungry. Our tongues exploring every inch of each other, battling for dominance.

God, her lips were as soft as I remembered. So red, so delicious and so soft, my perfect combination.

Her little pajama shorts rested low on her hips. I let my hands travel up lightly grazing her skin from those gorgeous hips to the hem of her tank. Her skin felt hot as I lifted it slowly. Bella broke our kiss softly and reluctantly, stopping my hands and giving me a final peck on the lips.

"Charlie's gonna be here soon Edward," she explained when I groaned in annoyance.

"So? Let him watch!" I grinned and winked, she gave me a warning look while untangling herself to grab some ingredients from the fridge. "It's okay, he's a man Bella, I think he's pretty aware of . . ."

"Watch it Edward!" she warned pointing at me with a knife, I looked at her warily. "For all you know if you hadn't blurted out we were having sex, he would still be happily thinking I was virgin. Which would save me all the awkward looks every time I go out, or stay over at Alice's or Angela's," she spat but she wasn't angry just being blunt.

I groaned and looked down on the floor, "It just came out at the time."

"You need to back off a little Edward, seriously"

I plopped back on the counter resting on my elbows and listening intently what she had to say.

"Look I was just joking around earlier okay? Don't be angry."

"I'm not angry," she said with a curve of a smile.

Silence.

I was dying to ask questions of my own.

"So . . . last night did happen you know?"

Well, that got her attention. She spun around from the stove glancing at me with hooded eyes.

"I know."

"And what does it mean? What do you expect me to do? Just to 'back off'?" I quoted her words slightly annoyed. I had no intentions of backing off, not again!

But if she asked me to, I would. For her. Shit, I'm so whipped.

"Oh, Edward, no!!" she rushed emphatically. I smiled.

"I didn't mean it like that! Its just sometimes you're too . . . pushy," she furrowed her eyebrows.

I laughed. I had no clue what she meant and I'm not sure if Bella did either but it was fine. I had her so everything was fine.

"So, everything is cool, we're back together!" I jumped up ready to hug her.

She stared at me not saying anything.

"Or not yet?" I sat back confused.

Bella took a breath. "No . . . no, it's just . . . I think we should go over some facts before we decide anything," she said calmly.

"I think it's a little too late for that Bella, last night did happen!"

"I know Edward! But we never talked about 'the drama' from before," she continued still calm.

Okay 'calm Bella' is scary. I nodded in understanding. Great, this was the talk I was hoping to avoid.

"Okay! I'm ready,soooo . . . lets," I said as she rolled her eyes. She knew I was avoiding. Hell, I really didn't want to have this conversation!

"Okay Edward, lets! First, I want to make something very clear: I DIDN'T kiss Jacob, he kissed me!"

I stared at her thinking before speaking. I carefully choose my reply. "Well, you didn't seem to be complaining love. I was there in my car and witnessed the whole thing. You didn't push him away at first."

She gave me a dumbfounded look. So much for trying to 'choose' a thoughtful 'reply'.

"I never responded to him! I let him see that the kiss didn't affect me, and after he was done he realized that he would never have a chance because I only saw him as a friend, a BROTHER!" she explained. "I won't lie to you Edward. Did I wonder if I had a slightest bit of feelings towards him?"

My head snapped up, paying close attention to that answer.

"Yes, for a small instant!" she confessed, I felt my heart break. "But that was only because Jacob was something different that I hadn't experienced: he was loving and caring and respectful, something I was quite honestly missing at that time in my life," she said sadly, by now my heart was completely shattered.

She continued. "Edward . . . you were nothing but an ass to me then and Jacob was there and he was so kind, I wondered what it would be like to be with someone who treated you the same way they said they felt. But after the kiss I knew we could never be anything more than friends."

Guilt. That's what I felt and I didn't know what to say to her heartfelt words. So in classic Edward fashion, I decided to make fun of the situation instead. At the time, it seemed the better choice than dealing with the 'you're an ass' theme.

"Did he use too much tongue?" I smirked looking up at her.

She blinked, sighed and turned around to work on breakfast. There had been a flash of hurt in her eyes. Damn, I really am a world-class asshole.

So what did I do? I laughed.

"Oh c'mon, I had to have my moment"

"You're impossible," she whispered.

I came up behind her and kissed her neck, she stiffened. "I'm a jerk, I know okay?"

I felt her relax a bit at my peace offering comment.

"So what happen with the idiot next door?" Bella froze. "Was he your punching bag too? It seems you're not any better than me Bella, you used people," I stated honestly. We were being honest right?

She spun around, "Okay, that was just one time and I was very sorry, but it was your fault entirely!"

"MY FAULT?"

"If you hadn't barged in here that night and . . . "

"OH NO wait! I asked you for a second CHANCE that night!"

"AND I GAVE YOU ONE!" she cut me off; I looked back at her quiet and dumbfounded. Her voice got soft, "Actually I gave you several. Remember?" Her eyes were beginning to water, "And you blew them all."

I couldn't even look at her now.

"Every time you yelled at me, every time we had a stupid fight and you would get violent, every time you were rough with me, I remained quiet and said nothing because I still believed the best in you. And that was my mistake!"

I didn't like the direction this conversatno was taking. I just wanted to start over, no rehash the past.

"I don't wanna talk about it!"

"Well, that's just too bad isn't it? Becase we're gonna talk about it!"

Well fuck me! I found this new, strong attitude of hers quite entertaining and very, very sexy, actually.

"Now . . ." she continued. "What happened with James was one time and nothing happened. He was there when you left and I was completely alone and broken, and well James was there. End of story," she sighed looking down, I could tell she was genuinely ashamed.

"It was wrong of me to do what I did, but we weren't together Edward, and I completely messed up with him. He was a good friend and now I don't if we can be. I hate myself for ruining that. Despite what you think, he's a really nice guy. Actually, I think you two could be friends."

Riiiiight, best friends, oh joy. I just nodded hoping she would let it go. I didn't want to hear anymore about how 'nice' the idiot was.

"Look, I stopped when I realized I only wanted you and no one else, and being with James wouldn't help my problem; our problems," she admitted biting her lower lip nervously.

"Its okay love, just lets . . . just . . . let this go . . . I don't want to do this anymore."

"We need to," she said pulling the orange juice out of the fridge and pouring me a glass. "Because if we're going do this, we're going do it right this time."

Please let her mean what I think she means.

"First, no jumping to conclusions. You can't come up with ridiculous scenarios before talking to me about it," she said holding her index finger. I nodded biting my lower lip.

"And when we do have to TALK about something," she emphasized her words because she knew our fighting would always be passionate. "We'll remain civil to each other."

"I can't promise you anything," I clasped my hands together.

I knew myself and I knew what I was like. I didn't Bella thinking I was suddenly going to have a personality change. The truth was I didn't know how to remain in control most of the time and when I lost it, I always felt justified.

I blinked. "But I'll try."

Bella smirked

"Okay. Next, OUR RELATIONSHIP stays OUT OF the PUBLIC eye!"

I rolled my eyes at her new proposition. "What is that supposed to mean?" I snapped.

"Let me spell it out. It only takes two people to have a serious relationship. There's no reason to share our sex life or what I'm like in bed with anyone!" she snapped coldly.

I raised an eyebrow, "I've never . . . "

"THINK AGAIN!"

_**May 13th, 4:07PM **_

_"Prude" I spat when she pulled away from my lips because our friends were giving her a hard time. _

_"How do you two even have sex!?" Emmett pushed. _

_"Like do you put a bag on your face or something?" Alice said teasingly. _

_"Let me guess you turn off the lights," Jasper was the next to speak up. _

_"How original," Rosalie smirked. _

_Though Bella seemed to be uncomfortable with the situation, I thought maybe this would help her to finally loosen up. I hated how naïve she behaved; it made me look like a weak. _

_"No, actually during sex she goes on top," I smirked with half-closed eyes picturing her naked on top of me while those perky breasts bounced up and down. _

_"Edward, please," she hissed at me clearly uncomfortable and disgusted. _

_"Or she's down on her knees," I continued, trying push all her buttons, I wanted her to loosen up and have fun. It's just sex. _

_"Stop that!" she snapped at me, Of course, that just pissed me off because I hated being told what to do so I pressed even further. _

_"She even lets me finish in her mouth, take that!" _

_At that, Bella went ballistic and started to walk away, instead I gripped her legs and kissed her to shut her up before she could say anything else. _

_October 9th, 12:03PM_

_"What are you doing?" she complained when I gripped her bottom in the school hallway. She was wearing a short skirt and looked hot. _

_She pushed my hands away and she spun around immediately trying to stand back a little. I glared at her; she should know better then do such a thing! _

_She seemed very uncomfortable that I touched her like I did, flustered even. _

_And of course, everybody was paying close attention to our little encounter._

_"You're my girlfriend! Why shouldn't I touch you?" I gritted, while sliding my hands under her skirt to squeeze her left cheek firmly as I jerked her body towards mine. _

_Every eye in the hallway was staring at us by now. Good. _

_**March 21st, 09:15PM**_

_Newton's eyes were fixed on Bella's ass and in my drunken state I wasn't able to confront him like I should and kick his scrawny ass. Instead I just pulled Bella's body closer, hugging her cute little bottom possessively, making sure he'd get the point that she was mine and mine only. _

_Of course she flinched at my touch, but didn't pull away. She knew better. _

"_Geez, piss on her already," Emmett laughed which made Bella push my hands off._

_I gave her a warning glance while pulling her hips in close. I was too tired to argue but was equally annoyed at everyone's bullshit and Newton's eyes on my girl._

_Instead I stare at her while answering Emmett's comment. "I should, seeing she doesn't seem to get the point." _

_She rolled her eyes, which really pissed me off._

"_I did something a lot similar the other night though," I smirked remembering how I finished off in her mouth, how she swallowed every bit of me. Of course at my choice of words she turned her head to look at me and widened her eyes pleading me not to say anything. _

_By this point Emmett's knowing laugh had gotten the room's attention.. _

"_She loved it," I grinned while grinding her hips seductively._

"_Bella, What did I taste like!?" I asked her. Okay, I was such an asshole. _

"It was all Newton's fault, he wouldn't back off. He's always liked you and always wanted you," I snapped at her. She knew it was true.

"Edward!" she warned.

"Jacob also," I continued coldly. "I was just reminding them that you were mine."

My response and attitude just annoyed her.

"If you're making our relationship public, and let everyone know what we do in the bedroom, then why not just have an open relationship and date whoever we want as well?" she taunted.

She. Wouldn't. Dare.

Coldly and harshly, I stated, "Would care to repeat that Bella?"

"And that's another thing – RIGHT THERE! The jealousy has got to stop!"

I snarled, pretty pissed right now.

"It's too much Edward!"

"It's not that bad Bella!"

Her eyes popped open wide, "You sent Eric Yorkie to the hospital!"

From what I recalled, not only was he asking for it but he deserved it.

_**April 15th, 1:45PM**_

_I was making my way down the hall to find Bella, after struggling with Mr. Banner about some Bio work. _

_I just wanted to find her and escape, maybe grab a bit to eat. I'd barely seen her all day, and I was a little anxious._

_And that's when I saw her laughing with Eric fucking Yorkie. The asshole had his hand on her hips and was wearing a seductive little grin on his face whispering something in her ear._

_Oh fuck NO! What the hell did he think he was doing with my girl? _

_I made my presence know when I cracked his head against the locker a little harsher than intended. Technically, it was an accident; I didn't mean to send him to the hospital. Of course, he never tried to come on to Bella again._

_**August 14th, 10:31PM**_

_I was totally not in the mood for this. _

_We had been dragged us to a club yet again when. People grinding, sweaty bodies and loud music wasn't on my agenda. I wanted nothing more than to head home with Bella and watch a movie or something._

_Okay, I want the 'or something.'_

_Sighing, it wasn't all that bad. The waitress? Hot! _

_The drinks? Perfect! _

_And the view?_

_Well seeing Bella in a super short, dark red strapless dress was quite the view. _

_Actually, it was brilliant! _

_But the conversation got too intense when Emmett wouldn't stop searching for random girls to make out with each other. When they proposed Bella do it with the kinky half-naked waitress I had enough. _

_Girl on girl? Hot. _

_My girl with another girl? Not so much. _

_Fuck no, not on my watch. _

_But then they kept teasing her, daring her to do it and out of the blue that slutty little waitress said,"Oh c'mon have some fun!" _

_Before anyone would move, she had grabbed Bella by the neck and had leaned in to kiss Bella. That was the last fucking straw. Bella was sitting on my lap in shock, nearly jumping out of her skin, I quickly got up setting her on her feet and making the other girl let go._

_Bella blushed furiously and looked away embarrassed. The waitress laughed but when she saw my cold glare she excused herself stating she was just having some fun and putting on a show like she was supposed, She offered a round of drinks on the house and sauntered away._

_I was done by then. I grabbed Bella's hand to get out of there. _

_Ignoring everybody's teasing about how I was a very selfish person. _

_Indeed. _

_**September twenty four 19:29 hours**_

"_Hello?" Bella picked up her phone for what seemed like the millionth time today. _

_Someone had been calling her constantly lately and it hadn't died down. _

"_Hello??" she said annoyed and louder. I slipped on a t-shirt and stared at her._

_This was not the first call this week and it was starting to piss me off. It seemed as if someone was trying to talk to her, and apparently didn't want me in the same room, Well that was too bad because I had no intention of leaving her side. _

_I observed her carefully: how she furrowed her eyebrows, how she sounded, how she would hang up after giving up from no getting a response._

_Maybe she was pretending. _

_Maybe she had a role in this little game. _

'_Hello? Hello?? *hint/he's here/hint*' _

_Maybe blaming her was wrong, but I couldn't help wonder. She'd been so distant lately.. _

"_A new fan?" I snapped. _

"_Don't even start," she sighed annoyed. She stood up to slip on her jeans. _

_I was not letting it go so easily though. _

"_Give me the phone, I want to see the number," I commanded._

_Bella continued to dress, clasping her bra and zipping her jeans. "Don't be stupid," she rolled her eyes, clasping her belt closed. _

"_I wasn't, GIVEME the phone, NOW Bella!" _

_Unbelievable!_

"_I'm not giving you anything, you're being stupid!" she spat grabbing her blouse that from the floor.. _

"_Who do you think you're dealing with??" I menaced darkly. "If this is Yorkie again or anyone else. . ." _

"_Now, I'm NOT ALLOWED to have friends of my own? That's freaking UNBELIEVABLE!" she yelled, buttoning her blouse. _

"_Bella, we're gonna have serious problems if you're screwing around behind my back or even thinking of trying to see someone else. I know perfectly well you would do just that!" _

_She looked livid. She raised her hand to slap me but before her hand made contact I grabbed it in mid-air. I flung it away and stalked off to look out the window, jaw clenched, hands fisted. _

"_Here we go!" she mumbled, And that's when I saw red. _

_**October twenty first 17:08 **_

_I caught Bella and Alice chatting on my room, right after we got home from school. _

_I was about to make my presence known when I suddenly heard something that caught my attention, so instead of walking inside the room, I stayed put behind the door to listen up closely. _

"_C'mon it will just be a fun night girls out!" I heard Bella loudly sigh. _

"_Not every day someone marries on school!" Alice laughed encouraging Bella. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, at what the hell they were talking about. _

"_That sounds like fun" Bella giggled followed by Alice's approval. _

"_It will be c'mon, supposedly Lauren wants to keep it simple and just be us girls and go to her home maybe have a slumber party, but I heard Jessica called a stripper!" they laughed. In unison. Making my anger boil at the same time. _

"_That would be quite the show" I heard my Bella say "I guess you'll tag along and Rosalie will come so why not?" Bella finally shrugged, but I could tell the excitement on her tone. _

_That's when I had it. _

_I laughed while I made my presence known letting the door open so Alice could walk out, I only gained their confused attention on me. _

"_I heard about Lauren slumber party" I nodded at her looking fun. _

"_What's so amusing about it?" Bella asked a little confused but keeping her tone light letting me know she was really clueless why I would come out with something like this. _

"_No that's not funny Bella…" she furrowed her eyebrows even more and I could tell Alice knew where I was going with this. _

_Good. _

"_The amusing part is that you actually think you're going" I let out a wide smile showing my perfect white teeth. _

_Alice sighed and jumped off the bed. _

"_See you guys later" and then closed the door behind her. _

"_Edward!" Bella pronounced sternly. _

_But if she was firm, I was nothing but adamant. _

_So she stayed with me that night of course, Alice and Rosalie whored around but Bella didn't, she knew better. _

Well yes, sure I had some anger issues.

And I hated people being near Bella, so?

"Again, I can't promise you anything" I mumbled with a final sigh looking at Bella. "But I'll try."

She nodded at me and sighed herself. She handed me a plate of scrambled eggs with toast while she ate in silence.

"No thanks, I'm gonna pass."

"What!? Why!? NO!" she whined, I laughed, I could be an ass but she never got tired of me, apparently. I know she also hated when people passed on her cooking.

"Well, it looks so delicious but I really want to get out of here in one piece," I grinned, earning me a throaty laugh.

I winked flashing her a crooked smile, "Don't worry, I'll be back so soon you won't have time to miss me,"

She blushed, God I love those little flushes of color. "Fine. I'll walk you out."

She waited for me by the door as I dashed up stairs to drag on my shirt and shoes, and grab my back pack.

Seeing her there looking so beautiful waiting to be kissed good-bye was a sight for sore eyes. I had missed her so much. I grinned as I buried my hands in her hair and leaned in to kiss her softly. Wanting to deepen the kiss, I licked her lower lip and pushed further inside, my tongue taking control of hers. I really could just kiss her forever.

God, I wanted to take her right there against the door but I held back. I needed to get home and clear my head. Maybe we could give this a try and do it right

Maybe we could start over

Both of us.

Maybe.


	24. New start

**I know its been awhileee, im very sorry about it! **

**And im sorry for the spelling mistakes too! **

**Enjoy!**

**I HAVE TO GET MY LAZY butt to work on the final chapter I know! Next chap is last, cause I cant run stories anymore, and this story wasn't going anywhere anymore! **

**Edward's POV: **

Damn, I loved this. I could be in this Heaven forever.

Cause there was nothing better than Bella's body grinding on top of mine, while her mouth worked over mine.

It was delicious!

Clothes were still a problem, but not for too long.

My hands that were resting on top of her hips pulling her down to my groin moved up to work underneath her shirt, I moaned when she twirled her tongue in a teasing way, she smirked against my lips and before I could successfully work my way up her breasts the door of my bedroom was being opened wide.

Revealing; the bitch, the pixie, the bear and the basketcase.

Bella immediately jumped almost out of her skin pulling away at the sudden audience.

"Woow"

"Nice!"

Cheers and laughs.

I groaned in frustration not letting Bella pull away completely off of me, two words and they'll be gone for good.

"Get out!" I snapped, Bella blushed when they whistle and tried to pull off from me but I held her still giving her an annoying look, letting her know 'not/to/move'.

"Put some ice on" Emmet laughed earning a grin from Jasper.

"C'mon bitches get off bed" Alice clapped her hands excitedly.

"NOW!" I spat at them.

"Edward, get off!!" Bella whined trying to struggle with my grip.

"So are you guys back together for good?" Rosalie asked.

"You better be" Emmet said while eating his chips.

Bella gave me a look with crimson red burning in her cheeks while she harshly moved away from me and the bed, getting up uneasily and uncomfortably when Emmet and Jasper wouldn't stop grinning at her.

"I never took you for the leading type" Emmet quirked his eyebrows suggestively.

"I thought you were ignoring me!" she spat fervently earning a couple of 'Ohh's' from the crowd.

Well yes, after all the nasty break-up Emmet and Rosalie were the ones to stay by my side, it was only fair of him to support me.

"She got you there!" Jasper laughed. Emmet looked uneasy while he put the chips down.

"Im sorry about that" he said sincerely.

"Whipped" Rosalie snapped, looking over at Bella with disdain.

Bella sighed; they never got a long just well.

I found myself horny as hell and pissed. That's when I remembered I wanted all of them out of here.

"OUT!" I snapped after the awkward silence fell on the room.

"C'mon, spring break is here! and I do not intend to spend it home!" Alice said.

I sighed in annoyance.

"We're leaving in a couple of hours and you guys have stuck your butts on bed the whole day!" she whined.

"Im not really in the mood to go on that trip Al" Bella sighed laying over next to me, snuggling closer to me, I wrapped my arm around her while I glared at everyone.

"Well luckily for you, I made sure to make your bags and put them in the truck!" Alice ignored her comment while glaring at Bella.

"Im gonna get some beer and stakes" Jasper said going out of the room.

"I'll come with you" Emmet mumbled following Jasper behind.

"We're leaving tomorrow at 8!" Alice yelled while walking out of the room, I sighed as the door closed shot again.

"Im not in the mood for this" I sighed loudly, I just wanted peace, calm and quiet for this week, I didn't want to spend spring break stressed out.

"We wont win over her" Bella whined putting a kiss to my throat.

"Cant we just get lost?" I offered she laughed.

"C'mon, it should be fun!" I groaned once again and snuggled closer to her warm body, burying my head on her neck tickling her a little when my lips brushed her neck, she giggled while wrapping her arms around me and slugging one of her legs around me as we both fell asleep.

**************

I woke up to find I was alone in bed. I groaned and raise up to look around the room for Bella.

But she was not anywhere to be seen.

"Bells?"

Nothing.

Suddenly the door opened and Alice walked in.

"Edward, c'mon, move it! We're leaving in 5!"

What?

"Alice? Where's Bella?"

"I took her home, she had to take her bags and get ready"

I nodded as I finally stood up and walked over to the bathroom to get ready.

*****

"So is everybody ready?" Alice leapt down the stairs with a huge smile on her face. Emmet, Rosalie, Jasper and Alice we're leaving in Emmet's jeep and I was travelling alone with Bella on my Volvo.

"Im gonna pick up Bella" I exclaimed opening the door "We'll catch up with you on the gas station" they nodded and I was off to my car.

Just in time I got to her driveway and honked on my horn signaling for her I was already here, I didn't catch Charlie's cruiser so I guessed she was all alone.

When I looked up I saw she was talking with that douche-bag James.

I sighed and walked out to make my presence known.

"Hey" James nodded at me when he saw me, Bella turned around and smiled at me.

"Hey baby, I was just telling James to meet us up there, it should be fun" I cringed inside but nodded my head.

"I don't think it's a good idea" James stood back somehow embarrassed.

"C'mon!" she pushed laughing "You can invite Victoria" she sing-song, making him blush even more, that gave me a sense of relief inside.

"I'll see what I can do" he promised.

"Give us a call if you do, we'll be spending all week there" I said that brought him to look at me surprised and nodded.

"Yeah, sure, why not?" I nodded and took Bella's hand.

"We should go" I said, she nodded and finally said her goodbyes taking my hand firmly on hers.

Once we got to the car and I speed off she started to ramble.

"I hope he can make it, I knew Victoria and she's very nice besides he needs the vacation" I listened carefully and gave my two cents from time to time.

We meet everybody on the gas station and then we head off taking several routes.

After awhile Bella fell asleep on my shoulder and I continued driving the whole way, she didn't wake up as I heard her steady breathing.

We pulled up to eat something and she was still dead asleep, I shook her a little to wake her up.

"Baby?" I asked, she groaned in her sleep.

"You want to eat or drink something?" I mumbled giving her a kiss on the cheek, she mumbled something that I wasn't able to catch.

"Bella?" then she opened her eyes and stare at me.

"What?"

"You want to eat something?"

"Im fine" she said, I frowned.

"Are you okay?"

"Im fine, Im just tired" I brushed my hand on her cheek and I felt her all warm.

"Are you feeling sick?" she shook her head 'no' fervently.

"Im just tired Edward, I promise" she leaned her head back on the passenger seat while closing her eyes again.

I nodded and give her a peck on the lips.

I still brought her a cheese burger and fries with a coke, after another hour she ate something.

Another couple of hours and we arrived to the resort, when we checked in and took our keys we left off to sleep the night.

Everybody was dead tired and not up for anything.

"Girls in one bedroom and boys in another-" Alice squealed excitedly but was of course stopped by a set of giggles and laughs from everyone else.

"Right" I spat sarcastically smirking while pulling Bella closer to my body, she looked up at me and grinned.

"Yeah, you do that" Emmet laughed.

We opened the door to see a beautiful flat rented for all of us with a perfect view to the beach.

Bella plopped down onto the bed after we checked the rented apartment; it was big enough for all 6 of us and even more, so if the rest of Bella's guests were to come they had somewhere to stay.

I stayed with Emmet and Jasper to drink something and play some pool, the girls on the other hand were already spent and went to sleep.

"So what are the plans for tomorrow?" I asked.

"I guess we'll just go to the same old beach" Emmet shrugged.

"Yeah I don't think it might be the time to look for something new, we can just ask later to somebody which places we can go" Jasper said.

I took a drag of my cigarette as I offered Emmet and Jasper one, which only Jasper took.

"What's up with Bella? We haven't seen here around" Emmet asked, I let out a breath of smoke as I answered:

"She was tired, but im thinking she doesn't feel too well" I sighed, having a sick Bella right now would only add more fuel to get me out of here.

"Oh…" Emmet nodded "Im hoping that wont ruin the trip" he groaned.

I gave him a look.

"Im just waiting for her to throw up to get her out of here" I scoffed while they rolled their eyes at me.

"Dude, you barely spend any time with us, you barely let HER breathe!" Emmet shouted at me, I was not listening though.

"Whatever" I mumbled while I walked out of there throwing my cigarette out of the window to go and get some sleep, I will surely need it.

*****

When I woke up it was past nine in the morning, and somebody was shaking me to move.

"Edward! C'mon! Everybody's ready, we're waiting for you!" Bella said softly, like the way she knew to use whenever it came to wake me up, she will mumble softly on my ear while laying kisses all over my shoulder blades and neck.

I grumbled a little and turn back to my other side not in the mood to get up.

I heard her sigh but I was determinate not to leave this room.

"Edward, please" she pleaded with me softly in that voice she knew how to use so I wouldn't get mad but her insisting was slowly disturbing.

"Get out" I mumbled, she laughed.

"You're impossible!"

"Mhhm.."

"Well…we'll be leaving then, I guess you're not coming" she said not insisting anymore, I was a little mad at this, she would leave me here and go to the beach instead of staying with me.

"Let them go, we'll go later" I snapped turning back down and going back to sleep.

"Edward" she sighed "I can go with…-" I didn't let her finish.

"I said I'll take you later" I snapped a little bit more harshly then intended and this time went back to sleeping with no more interruptions.

Sadly when I woke up it was past noon, around 2 a clock, I guess that trip took the best of me.

"Shit!" I mumbled while taking the covers off of me and silently walking outside not bothering to wear anything but my boxers.

To my surprise I found Bella sitting on the coach with her feet on the coffee table and passing channels around looking none interested at all.

I sighed and walked over from behind, resting my elbows on the coach and leaning over to her, so my chin was resting on her shoulder.

"What are you watching?" I mumbled in a low voice.

"Nothing" she sighed, coughing a little, I furrowed my eyebrows worriedly.

"That doesn't sound good" I said, she shook her head.

"Im fine" she mumbled, she was keeping me away of something.

I sighed not really wanting to do this so early, I walked around and sat next to her nudging her arm to get her to look at me.

"Hey…look at me" I sighed when she wouldn't turn around, I tried to take her hands in mine but she refused brushing them off.

"Don't even start with me Edward!" she ordered turning back on her side to watch the TV.

I sighed and stayed put for awhile, maybe I should take a shower and get her to cool off so I wouldn't warm up, I knew my temper and she knew it perfectly well too.

So I waited refusing to leave this living room before talking to her, when she got up and said nothing to me I snapped.

"Where are you going?"

"To the bathroom! Is that okay with you?" she snapped finally slamming the door shot. I sighed one more time taking my hands in my face.

I should have let her go have fun on her spring break, but was it wrong I wanted her all to myself?

Bella came out of the bathroom after awhile looking dead tired, I frowned but said nothing, I wasn't her favorite person right now, I rested my elbows on my knees and took my head in my hands while I turned towards her, who was taking her bottle of water that was on the coffee table.

I took this opportunity to take her attention.

"Hey c'me here" I asked stretching my hand for her to take.

She sighed.

"Edward, please don't" she spat irritated.

"C'me here!" I said more persistently taking her hand and dragging her on my lap, not letting her go.

She stood quiet and said nothing looking to her palms resting on her lap.

"Im sorry about what happened" I mumbled rolling my eyes, im an extreme proud person and saying those words, it only aches every time.

"Edward! We've already had this talk, so I have nothing to say to you!" she snapped.

"I was tired Bella, I didn't feel like going anywhere" I excused myself more harshly then intended to, as I pulled her closer and put a hand on my face really tired of all this.

"But its not fair!" I cut her off.

"I know, im just not feeling like being here, I really want to go!" I whined. She rolled her eyes and got up.

"What shall we do now?" she sighed opening the fridge looking for something, I got up and followed her.

"I could think about one or two things" I grinned, she looked at me sternly, her face serious.

"Im too tired" she mocked me.

And that's how we spent the rest of the day moody and pissed at each other.

Later on we went to sleep with not much of a word to share.

Next morning I woke up and she was moving around the room collecting her stuff and putting them inside her bag, I got up and walked over to her wrapping my arms around her.

Didn't leave her much of a room to object either, simply pulled her closer and snuggled my face on her neck making her giggle.

"Im sorry about yesterday" I breathed groggily still tired from sleep, I was never a morning person and she knew it.

"Asshole" she elbowed me, and just like that I knew I was forgiven.

We went to the dining room only to find everybody up and ready to leave for the beach once again, reluctantly I followed behind, and once we got there things didn't get any better.

I didn't leave the boat with a pack of cigarettes and a cold beer in hand playing solitaire cause all the other pussys around found fun to dive under water while I was never a fun of the sea.

Bella would lay on her inflatable mattress and drink her lemonade, I heard little of her, she would occasionally climb in and jump in my lap after a make out session she would go back down to water.

Something was off with her though.

She was quiet the whole trip and wouldn't eat anything.

When I would ask her if she was okay she would nod her head and give me a kiss saying not to worry about it, she was just tired.

Finally we arrived to the flat where the girls started preparing tacos except for Bella who wrapped herself in a blanket and lay on the couch.

"Where are we going tomorrow night guys?" Rosalie asked having a bite of her sandwich and sitting over Emmet's lap.

"There's a club around here, hottest place in town they say; its called…" Alice began trying to remember the name of the club "Mmh…Honey Beach!" she said excitedly, while helping Jasper with the tacos.

I didn't pay much attention when I handed Emmet a cold bear and opening my own all the time making my way towards Bella's form on the couch sitting beside her and stroking my hand up and down her arm, she sighed and gave me a small weak smile.

"Bella are you okay hun?" Alice asked from the kitchen.

She was too weak to answer.

"I think she got sunstroke" I said softly with a sigh.

Bella sighed at me and shook her head.

"Don't start with that again, it was probably something I ate" she protested.

"You spent the whole day laying on that mattress!" I raised my voice.

"I used protection" she dared.

"You didn't use one that was strong enough for your skin!" she sighed and pushed me with her hand.

"Shut up, let me sleep" she whined.

I sighed and got up frustrated.

"Why do I bother"

So when I forced her to eat, she didn't. When I told her to take some medicine she refused. I threatened her to take her back to Forks on my shoulder if I have to and she simply snuggled on the couch and said nothing to me.

She was stubborn as I was.

Even worse.

Later when everybody was done eating we decided to go downstairs to the pool and enjoy the breeze of the ocean.

"Oh yes! I heard they had a deck!" Bella exclaimed excitedly as she got up eagerly off the couch, the blanket still wrapped around her and a pale white look on her face, I cringed at the thought of her going out this late and with the breeze hitting in her face she would only get sicker.

But I was not about to object with her anymore.

"So lets go!" Emmet clapped taking the little fridge in his hands and going out the door Bella following close behind them, I followed after her seeing the elevator was too tiny for more people the rest of the gang would follow after us.

Emmet jumped in first seeing he was so big the fridge and him took a lot of space, Bella would be wrapped around her blanket on the other side of the elevator and I was across from her watching her intently.

"We should totally check the pool table they got on the lobby" Emmet said I simply nodded.

"They have a piano also if you want to be a pansy" Emmet laughed at me, while I gave him a glare, Bella laughed softly and smiled at me.

"He's not a pansy, he's talented" she smiled I kept my intense eyes on her, watching her intently with no emotion.

"Whatever! He sings Celion Dion" I gave him a glare taking my eyes off of her.

"I DO NOT!" I protested.

"Im not feeling…"

"You do! And you write poetry too!"

"Very well"

"You're full of bullshit!" the door of the elevator opened and I was about to step outside when Bella slide down to the floor, I looked in shock at she slowly fell her blanket was making the landing slow as possible.

"BELLA!" I panicked, making my way to her, Emmet was unable to move with the fridge but jumped us both to get out of the way, I took Bella in my arms and shook her.

"Bella! Wake up!"

"I'll go call the girls!" Emmet said hurriedly running around.

"Love, wake up" I shook her and then she opened her eyes, coming around from her black out.

"What?"

"Are you okay?" I asked her very worried.

"Im fine" she whispered.

I scold her up in my arms and brought her outside sitting her in a bench.

"Love, you fainted" I took her face in my hands and looked into her eyes, she was very pale and her eyes were red.

Emmet came from the stairs bringing a glass of water with sugar.

"What happened!!?" Alice and Rosalie came in looking worried.

Then Bella moved her head out to the grass and threw up, I held her head in my hands and waited patiently till she was done, she took the glass out of my hands and drank.

"That's it! We're leaving first thing tomorrow"

"NO!" she protested out of breath when she was done drinking.

"Bella" I warned her.

"Edward its just a flu!" she protested.

Nobody dared to say anything but I had made up my mind along time ago.

"Flu or not ill take you home" she sighed but didn't say anything more after we got to the apartment was when she said.

"Its just a virus!" she shook my hands off of her and lay on the bed.

I got outside to talk to the guys and tell them I was leaving with Bella of course they tried to change my mind which didn't work out.

"Just wait for the morning, she'll feel better!" Emmet protested taking a zip of his drink.

"Edward don't be so drastic" Jasper agreed.

"Im not having that, im bringing her back to Forks, she needs to see a doctor" my overprotective mood snapped.

"Its just a stomach virus Edward, lets just wait till tomorrow, she'll feel better really" Alice promised me giving me a hug.

I sighed and took a cigarette out of my pocket, then I heard a laugh I looked up to glare coldly at Emmet.

"Dude, you're such a pansy whipped"

I didn't bother to correct him.


	25. Future with You

I am sooo sorry for the awful spelling and grammar , English isn't my first language and I've lost practice after so much time.

Im putting an end to this story cause I don't know how long ill be having internet and I still have a story to finish, so I don't have really the time to write all the time. And I want to finish both, and I was going nowhere with this one anymore, so please understand. Thanks for all the support you've given so far. You're wonderful. Enjoy.

Last Chapter.

That is no way to wake up someone…

When he first shook me I ignored it, i was too far asleep to tend to him or whatever it was that was keeping me away from my good needed sleep. Should of had guessed it was him the second time he shake me roughly trying to get me to get up. I groaned in my sleep not ready to open my eyes quite yet.

"Bella" I heard a faint voice calling my name. I groaned in response, not opening my eyes, my head was banging and my throat was aching i was in no mood to talk right now.

"Wake up" Edward ordered.

"Edward…let's talk about it tomorrow" I managed to whisper.

"No Bella, now!" i groaned when he sat me up on the head board to keep me straight.

"What is it?" i snapped harshly.

His eyebrows were close together just like he did when he was worried or angry, or confused. His lips were in a tight smile, and he looked kinda off like trying to focus on something.

"What!!??"

"Bella I need to ask you something and you better be completely honest about it!" i heard his words carefully even though he was trying to threaten me at last his voice sounded like it was breaking.

"Dont talk to me like that" i snapped not taking once his bullshit.

He ignored me when he shook his head and pulled my hands in his keeping them close tight together.

"Bella are you protecting yourself?" he asked nervously i almost laughed, clearly i wasnt, cause here i was in a bed in the middle of vacations with a throbbing stomach and a headache.

"I didn't took my vitamines…dad!" I snapped giving him a glare, his grip in my hands tightened and made me took careful notice in his eyes and take more seriously the moment.

"Im not talking about that kinda of protection Bella" he snapped with little bit of patience, i frowned my eyebrows together "Are you on the pills or not?" he sighed at last.

I widened my eyes in surprise.

And almost laughed at the thought of how badly he would take the news i was pregnant.

If i was, thats for sure.

And i almost told him that, to give him a heart attack and stop the madness, he was such a douche.

But i knew better than to even attempt escaping such words out of my mouth. God forbide me.

I could already picture the papers.

´Crazy guy hangs girl by the neck. No survivors'

Ha. No jokes, i told myself. I wanted to keep his record clear.

Besides we've already been through that. And it was not pretty.

_I cling my arms around my petit form protectively, my hands shaking and my body trembling, Edward was pacing around the room in giants steps, here and there__…_

_His breath was erratic and he growled once in awhile keeping his eyes in me, even if I wouldn__'__t__ give him any form of attention, I guess I was trying to keep attention away from me. I refused to cry cause it would only get me into trouble. _

_I already knew he thought this was my fault. It needs two, but whatever. Of course I didn__'__t__ dare to prove my point either. _

_I was safely sound in here, in the comfort of my bed. _

_Waiting. _

_30 minutes it was all it took for my day sentence. _

_Alice was waiting downstairs with Jasper cause she knew it would get ugly, she tried to get in the room a few times but gave up when Edward let her know he wouldn__'__t__ get tired of kicking her out the times it took for her to get the message. _

"_What are you thinking?__"__ Alice asked Jasper looking up from the table. _

_He hesitated a little. _

"_I don__'__t__ know__…__I guess__…__lets hope for the best, I don__'__t__ think he will__…__-__-"__he was cut of by a banging noise upstairs, Alice immediately jumped but when she was about to go upstairs Edward was coming down in a storm of pure anger, banging the walls to his right with his fist before walking out of her house slamming the door behind him. _

_Bella ran after him a little bit shaken and crying. _

"_EDWAR!__"__ she yelled. But he was gone. She sighed and sat on her steps. _

_Alice sat beside her and gripped Bella__'__s hand for reassurance. _

_Bella looked up at her with puffy eyes and nodded at her. _

"_Positive__"_

'Those things happen', was the only thing the doctor said, after explaining to me I was **not **pregnant.

I spaced out for a little and this seemed to put Edward on edge.

"Im not pregnant!"I said annoyed.

"Bella..-." he didn't seem confident.

"Edward!" I took his face in my hands.

"I am not …" his tone of voice overpowered my 'pregnant'

"You need to tell me the truth!"

"Im just sick, I have a small fever, nothing serious!"

"I don't want to-…"

"Edward! Seriously! Stop!"

"Im on the pills and I don't appreciate your input, what would you have to say to me otherwise? It takes two to tango! Be a man! Geez…!" I snapped cuddling back to sleep.

"Don't even start with that Bella, im trusting you!"

"Then trust me on this" I glared at him with my eyes, I was not taking any more of his bullshit as I drifted off to sleep ignoring his calls.

"We're leaving first thing tomorrow" he let me know.

Leaving actually sounded like a wonderful idea. Pretty much. I was not feeling well.

And I seriously was not about to argue with Edward on that one. But I was not about to inflate his ego even more.

And just like that when I woke up all my things were packed. I hesitated a little about leaving when I saw all my bags at my feet, maybe I was feeling better now?

I tried to stand but no…my sore legs would not do the job.

I sighed.

"Edward!" I called.

One minute later that mane of bronze crazy hair popped into the room walking in shirtless in that awful way he knew how to attract my attention.

He walked to me and gave me a peck on the lips muttering a 'good morning'

"Where's everybody?" I asked groggily.

"At the beach" he said like it was the most obvious thing. I realized now it was 11 am.

"Oh" why was I so damn tired?

"Walk me to the bathroom?" I asked like a child would to his father.

He smiled a little and didn't hesitate in holding me up in his arms bridal style and carrying me to the bathroom.

"Need some help?" he asked.

"Im okay" I nodded assuring him.

"Breakfast's on the table, we're leaving in 10" he simply said after closing the door behind him.

I quickly took a bath strong enough this time to rise up and do all my morning ritual, dressed, brushed my teeth and ate some proper breakfast, I was actually feeling better, still sore but at least could walk on my two feet.

"Carslile wants to check on you..-" he started to say once we were fully packed and ready to roll, but I cut him off knowing better.

"Edward once I step a foot on Forks im going home to see Charlie, I'll go finish my homework and then im going to sleep" I sentenced firmly, and he was not going to say anything about it.

"No you're not…!"

"Yes I am!"

"I know better!" he snapped "You need to see someone, you're not feeling…"

"You're overreacting like you always do!" I laughed.

Now, I knew overprotective people and then I knew Edward.

He sighed and I don't think it was exactly a defeated sigh.

But I was stubborn.

And I would have actually won this round if I hadn't fallen asleep in the car.

When I woke up I was on Edward's bed and Carslile and Edward were just walking in the room, I sighed while I sent daggers with my eyes to Edward.

Damn him.

'Hi bella' Carslile said politely.

"

"Hey" I answered with a small smile, being perfectly polite.

'Edward seems to be worried about something' Carslile gave me a look.

'Im fine, I just feel tired and sick, he's being an idiot like always, don't you know him already?' I practically ignored the fact he was standing there. Better listen douche!

He put his hands on his hips while giving me a look.

And of course he got away with what he wanted.

"'You have a small fever, and you've been feeling so tired because you're awfully stressed, but its nothing to worry about I already script some medications that would get your defenses up, and drink a lot of OJ Bella it would do you good. And for the stress part…'

'Dump Edward? Ha. I was about to get on it Doc.' I gave him a wide smile. Edward glared at me and grumped something under his breath. Carslile laughed and walked out of the room.

I gave him a stern look and he sighed walking over to me plopping his weight onto the bed hovering above me without crushing me entirely. I laughed under my breath when he hid his face on my neck, breathing my scent. I wrapped my arms around my neck pulling him even closer if it was possible.

"'Take me home'

'Mhh..mm..later..' he mumbled.

I laughed once more.

'Get up' I ordered smacking my hand on his shoulder he sighed but got up.

Wow. After all he was changing and I was aware of that. He was actually paying attention to me, that's a first, I had to hand it to the guy he was trying to put some effort out there these couple of days.

I was about to lose a bet.

"'Hey Bella' he called before I could get out of the car.

'Im sorry for what happen yesterday, it wont happen again' my eyebrows furrowed. He was apologizing.

I just lost a bet.

'Just don't ever put that on me again, the thought of having children sickens you but..-' he cut me off.

'Don't, its not that, its just not the time..' wooow….what was that?

'What?' he asked when I was starring crazy at him.

'You've been thinking about children in another time?' I asked incredulously.

He stumbled on his words.

'No..i mean, I just figured later on, when we're married...' WOOOW…what??

'Edward..' he blushed he actually blushed.

'Don't look at me like that!' he snapped furious. I laughed. He just got even pissed.

'Get out of my car'

'I love you' I smiled when I pulled him into a passionate kiss which he responded soon.

'I've always pictured you in my future' he whispered when we parted for air.

I smiled against his lips.

'I just guessed I was..'

'You're in my future alright' I nodded with a big smile.

I was fully recovered now.


End file.
